www.creedthoughts.gov.www/creedthoughts

Art. Humor. Feminism. Animals. Politics. Film. Television. Tattoos. General Badassery.

[tropconnu]

99% sure my soulmate is a piece of bread

[baetology]

Describe your perfect date in detail.

[sonypraystation]

ideal date: it happens

[bibliotechno]

What is my perfect date? I break into Tiffany’s at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It’s priceless. As I’m taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It’s her father’s business. She’s Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don’t trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he’s the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris, by the Trocadero. She’s been waiting for me all these years; she’s never taken another lover. I don’t care, I don’t show up. I go to Berlin. That’s where I stashed the chandelier.

[s1urpee]

I’m not a person I’m just 3 mental illness stacked on top of each other wearing a trench coat

[iwantcupcakes]

The Mermaid (2016).

[thievinggenius]

Tattoo done by Jack GOKS Pearce.

[nintendette]

Everytime a Florida Man is arrested, the spirit of Florida leaves his body and possesses another.

[mashable]

[tsunamiwavesurfing]

the hotter it gets the more i realize i only fuck with the summer superficially and in concept

[fdsfjdsfjkf93723679267-deactiva]

Due to unfortunate circumstances, I am awake.

[thebestoftumbling]

Cat ownership in a nutshell. (x)

[boredpanda]

Furbonacci Sequence Proves That Cats Are Purrfect

[geeksquadgangbang-deactivated20]

Check It Out! with Dr. Steve Brule S3, Ep2

[pussysista-deactivated20170521]

[marypickfords]

What We Do in the Shadows (2014)

[itsvondell-deactivated20180104]

you can take one man’s trash to another man’s treasure but you can’t make it drink

[stack--trace]

Fun fact: the blending of idioms or cliches is called a malaphor.

My personal favorite is “We’ll burn that bridge when we get to it.”

[chromalogue]

I’m rather fond of “It’s not rocket surgery” and “not the sharpest egg in the attic,” but my all-time favourite is, “…until the cows freeze over.”

[mathionalist]

More, more!

[hosekisama]

Don’t count your chickens before you break a few eggs. Actions speak louder than the sword. What’s good for the goose is the enemy of the good. Let sleeping dogs bark up the wrong tree.

[spermicidalmaniac]

Don't throw your baby out before it's hatched.

[90srunway]

[whatyouloves]

[bringoutthebling]

😍😍😍