“Best Food Opinions” Record Holder

American/Male/23 I’m like if a cartoon character was a real person. I also make a the drawings.

[spicyhamsamson]

Someone reblogged one of my posts and tagged with with #swearing and honestly that’s one of the greatest honors I’ve ever received

[spicyhamsamson]

I think it’s so cool

[spicyhamsamson]

I love pissing my friends off by talking about food and posting pictures of yummy food I eat

[spicyhamsamson]

I didn’t even need to say anything this time

[spicyhamsamson]

I’m like, the most awesomest epic badass to ever do it, if you really think about it

[spicyhamsamson]

Shoutout to my completely useless blinds

[spicyhamsamson]

Me, stubbing my toe: Yowie! That really hurt!

The fujoshi that lives under my sink crawling out and making eye contact with me: Say that again.

[spicyhamsamson]

Shoutout to these light switches in my apartment that connect to absolutely fucking nothing

[spicyhamsamson]

Y’know how there’s the Herald of Galactus?

I think The Woman Who Points and Says “It’s Spider-Man!” is the Herald of Spider-Man

[spicyhamsamson]

I think the world would be a better place if I specifically could use ki blasts

[spicyhamsamson]

Whenever I have negative thoughts, I psychically project an image of Spider-Man or Sonic the Hedgehog into my mind as a calming mechanism.

[spicyhamsamson]

My beautiful daughter is starting kindergarten tomorrow, I’m so proud of her.

[spicyhamsamson]

Strongly considering buying a rubber chicken.

[spicyhamsamson]

Think I might be the first person to beat the secret boss of Deltarune Chapter 3 in under 10 tries while suffering from kidney stones. So uh

Put that in your fuckin’ history book, why don’t you

[spicyhamsamson]

While walking home today, I saw a cool old guy with a cowboy hat and black overcoat leaning against a wall stoically, and my first thought was “Bro, that’s The Mentor™, he can teach me incredible combat skills.”

[spicyhamsamson]

I love pissing my friends off by talking about food and posting pictures of yummy food I eat

[spicyhamsamson]

Bro, more people gotta start drawing characters eating a big bowl of spaghetti together and then eating the same noodle and kissing like that one scene in Lady in the Tramp

[spicyhamsamson]

The way you tag your posts is Insane. Please never stop

I got a big smile on my face