// only locals //

hello, hello! independent, selective, private multi-muse blog , featuring muses from The league of gentlemen. written & loved by kaddie. est. oct 2017. what's all this shouting? multi-everything & 18+. please read rules before interacting! we'll have no trouble here! this is a local shop for local people. there's nothing for you HERE.

[spookyvasey]

                                welcome to royston vasey                                                                                         you’ll never leave

                                                                     independent, selective, && private                                                                 multi-muse ; written && loved by kadi                                                          feat. muses from the league of gentlemen                                                                                           18+ && nsfw present                                                                                                 promo credit ( x )

[spookyvasey]

Ѡ - Hilary @ Geoff

send us some good shiet // @spookakimbo ( hilary briss )

(  ✉ → H. Briss ) AW WHAT THE FUCK MAN?!(  ✉ → H. Briss ) WHEN I SAID I WANTED SOME SAUSAGES, THIS IS NOT WHAT I MEANT.(  ✉ → H. Briss ) FUCKING HELL. IS THAT A STEAK COVERING YOUR WILLY?

[spookyvasey]

when u wanna rp but like lmao what are icons doe

[alannasroleplaymemes-moved]

REBLOG IF YOUR MUSE IS A HOT MOM

[aukives]

Stella is my favourite wife in all of Vasey.

[brittsmemes]

WIFE / HUSBAND APPLICATION:

Name: 

Age: 

How well do we know each other?: 

Do you have a pet name for me?: 

Do I have a pet name for you?: 

Are you attracted to me?: 

Why do you want to marry me?: 

Big wedding or Small wedding?: 

Do you see children in our future?: 

[mayoade]

[droqo]

[enstorie]

send one to see how my muse reacts  /  rough ( some nsfw ) edition.

[ press ] to roughly push my muse against the wall.

[ guide ] to roughly grab my muse and pull them into a passionate kiss.

[ yank ] to roughly grab my muses arm preventing them from leaving after an argument.

[ pin ] to roughly grab my muses wrists.

[ tug ] to roughly grab my muses hair.

[ rip ] or [ rip + name clothing piece ]  to roughly rip a piece of clothing off my muse.

[ spank ] to spank my muse.

[ choke ] to choke my muse. 

[ push ] to roughly push my muse onto a bed.

[ofmymuses]

a ship where muse a is big, rough and hot-headed but when it comes to muse b, they would die for them – they make muse a all blushy and happy

ヽ (✿◠‿◠) ノ.･ﾟ*｡･+☆ ヽ (◠‿◠ ✿ ) ノ

[vaememes]

SCOOBY  -  DOO  SENTENCE  STARTERS  !

❝ It looks like a mystery to me. ❞

❝ I can already taste those chocolate-covered hotdogs. ❞

❝ I’ll wait here and when you find out, send me a telegram. ❞

❝ Can I help it if my first toy was a garbage disposal? ❞

❝ I’m so scared I wish I had a ham sandwich. ❞

❝ It sure would help if we could find another clue. . ❞

❝ Well, we saw a very strange character running around out there. ❞

❝ Besides us there is no one else on this island. ❞

❝ We know we didn’t imagine all those kooky things that happened. ❞

❝ Maybe the moonlight was playing tricks on you. ❞

❝ You shouldn’t believe everything you read. ❞

❝ Soap? I hardly use it myself, but why not? ❞

❝ Creeps and Crawls! They sure picked the right lawyers for this job. ❞

❝ Come on, ______. Where’s your sense of humour? ❞

❝ I’m beginning to think that following ghosts is safer than following you two! ❞

❝ Another mystery bites the dust. ❞

❝ I have to figure out why my trap didn’t work. ❞

❝ Oh, good gracious! What is that? ❞

❝ Why do you need more money? ❞

❝ What about this locket we found where you were digging? ❞

❝ Well, guess we owe you kids thanks. ❞

❝ Like, uh-uh– Like, who–who is this? ❞

❝ The real mystery has just begun.. ❞

❝ You don’t know what you’ve uncovered. ❞

❝ You should never have brought that locket out of the cave. ❞

❝ Gang, we have a mystery on our hands! ❞

❝ Think you could come and get us? ❞

❝ I guess we’re here for the whole night. ❞

❝ I left a few pages blank, you know, for future traps. ❞

❝ Rule number two: stay in your rooms, no matter what you hear. ❞

❝ I’m starting to smell a little… funky. ❞

❝ Like, I’ve got a bad feeling we’re gonna find out. ❞

❝ Are you trying to set me up with - him/her/them? ❞

❝ Anyone with hair that perfect has to be guilty of something. ❞

❝ Does this mean you finally accept what I want to do with my life? ❞

❝ Wow, who are you trying to impress? ❞

❝ Like, what can I say? Junk food and me have a very special relationship. ❞

❝ I have no idea what you’re talking about.  ❞

❝ You promised me you were going to start caring more about your appearance. ❞

❝ What in the name of whole wheat toast is going on? ❞

❝ I didn’t know this year’s prom theme was terror and pandemonium. ❞

❝ I need to tell you something and I need you to listen. ❞

❝ Isn’t it obvious? My looks are starting to fade. ❞

❝ But what are you doing here? Why have you been sneaking out? ❞

❝ Like, you don’t hear many monsters from other dimensions scream for help. ❞

❝ Why can’t anything in this town ever turn out to be real? ❞

❝ Hooray! Hip hip hooray! Hip hip hooray! ❞

❝ Hey, little muffin, how ‘bout you and me go for a moonlight ride? ❞

❝ All I know is, since my dad owns the place, we get free refills. ❞

❝ Did you break into the armory and steal a rocket launcher? ❞

❝ Don’t be so hard on yourself. You tried to do a very brave thing. ❞

❝ I’m going to have to let out an unearthly howl and destroy you. ❞

❝ I would have gotten away with it if it wasn’t for you meddling– ❞

❝ Zoinks! ❞

[spookyvasey]

{ @spookakimbo } // { @ashesri }

[spookyvasey]

to-do :

Add : Pauline, David, Lisgoe

[iamthesindarinkingofmirkwood-de]

Send an “Ѡ” for my muse’s reaction to being sent accidental nudes.

[littlelovelymemes]

✰ * º ❛   more popular text posts starters   ❜

‘  i’m what the kids call full of anxiety  ’ ‘  life has truly been meaningless without vine. nothing’s funny anymore. i haven’t laughed in months, not even a chuckle.  ’ ‘  no offense but….. release your inhibitions, feel the rain on you skin  ’ ‘  people are always like ‘are you a morning person or a night person’ and i’m just like buddy i’m barely even a person  ’ ‘  i’m such a fall bitch i wish it was october  ’ ‘  i might be a bit fucked up but i swear i have a good heart  ’ ‘  nothing will ruin your 20′s more than thinking you should have your life together  ’ ‘  not dating me? sad. tragic. for you at least  ’ ‘  nothing feels better than winning monopoly. not love. not sex. not free pizza. nothing  ’ ‘  it makes my whole day better to see you  ’ ‘  do u ever get those days where u actually look kinda ok and u take 400 selfies bc this day may never come again  ’ ‘  uhh!! i need a gif, a vacation, a bowl of fruit, and $40,000  ’ ‘  i just want my heart to stop hurting  ’ ‘  how do you get undepressed  ’ ‘  yeah i be sad sometimes, but don’t get it twisted i ain’t weak, bitch  ’ ‘  how do i become easier to love  ’ ‘  (not so) Breaking News: i’m sad again and everyone’s tired of hearing about it  ’ ‘  self care is rolling over and going back to sleep  ’ ‘  plot twist: you let someone in and they don’t fuck you over. now that sounds lit.  ’ ‘  i’m gonna hire someone to stand behind me and say swag whenever i pause between words  ’ ‘  i’m fluent in talking shit  ’ ‘  is ‘no’ an emotion because i feel it  ’ ‘  why doesn’t anyone appreciate my sarcasm and bitterness as much as i do  ’ ‘  who needs ghosts? haunt your own house. wander around your own living room wailing and crying  ’ ‘  i wanna be in love but also yikes  ’ ‘  i thought the stars were beautiful, but then i looked into your eyes  ’ ‘  i love people who get excited about stars  ’ ‘  i wonder if someone has ever thought of me so much at night that they couldn’t sleep  ’ ‘  i feel at home when i look at you  ’ ‘  i want to be kind and gentle and loving and i want people to see me and smile and i just want to make people happy  ’ ‘  grandad built this house with his bare hands, kids. most people use bricks but not grandad. he thought hands were bricks.  ’ ‘  the gorilla could have died and been done with in like a week but none of you know how to be normal  ’ ‘  i break my heart three times per day  ’ ‘  i’m tired, but i’m not sure what i’m tired of yet  ’ ‘  making me laugh is the key to my heart  ’ ‘  i stay alive for like 3 people lol  ’ ‘  sometimes u just wanna bash your fucking head in  ’ ‘  highest form of art: girls  ’ ‘  i don’t want to look ‘pretty’ i want to look otherworldly and vaguely threatening  ’ ‘  the best kind of alcohol is a lot  ’ ‘  yoU THINK YOU’RE REAL CUTE, DON’T YOU???? REAL FUCKING CUTE, RIGHT???? i think so too  ’ ‘  and when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while, because you’re evil and you smiling like that generally doesn’t indicate anything good. i wouldn’t even call that smiling, it’s more like smirking.  ’ ‘  i love drunk me but i don’t trust her  ’ ‘  mood: i’ll wait in the car  ’ ‘  napping together is an important part of a relationship  ’ ‘  write ‘nothing is set in stone’ on my grave both as a witty joke and a subtle warning that i will be back  ’ ‘  if ur gonna date me u gotta be comfortable with a lot of casual silence bc i just never fucking talk  ’ ‘  current mood: angrily bisexual  ’ ‘  have you ever just stopped and realized if you haven’t met a certain person in your life, your life would be completely different  ’ ‘  are those feelings??? get them away from me  ’ ‘  i hope that i’m ok in a few years  ’ ‘  what a beautiful day to mind ya damn business  ’ ‘  i may seem like an angry person on the surface but deep inside i’m actually angrier  ’ ‘  my life is just a collection of poorly made decisions with alternative music playing in the background  ’ ‘  you can’t spell school without ‘i want to stab myself’  ’ ‘  i’m too cute for 90% of the shit i go through  ’ ‘  the first step to any murder is to have fun and be yourself  ’ ‘  do i like him or is he just tall  ’ ‘  i hate perfect people… which is why i hate myself  ’ ‘  becoming a cold hearted bitch wasn’t really what i planned to do with my life but here i am  ’ ‘  hi i’m here to ruin everything  ’ ‘  oh sorry i was thinking about myself. did you want something?  ’ ‘  how do you politely tell someone that you want them naked on top of you  ’ ‘  i’m not even sassy i’m just an asshole  ’ ‘  i use hun not hon because you are not my honey, you are my fierce warrior  ’ ‘  no mom i already have a job it’s called being hardcore  ’ ‘  the best revenge is to look good  ’ ‘  it’s raining but it’s not men so what’s the point  ’ ‘  there’s always that one weak bitch in the group that isn’t down with murder  ’ ‘  sometimes being a person is very overwhelming  ’ ‘  i came out to attack people and i’m honestly having such a good time right now  ’ ‘  imagine a bag of trash with the words ‘handle with care’ and ‘fragile’ written on it. that would be me.  ’ ‘  the first step to murder is to have fun and be yourself  ’ ‘  i always wear black just to remind you that i’m always ready for your funeral  ’ ‘  i’m single by choice. it’s just not my choice.  ’ ‘  wanna know how punk i am?????? *punches a wall* drive me to the hospital  ’ ‘  idk what i’m doing w/ my life but i know i’m doing it wrong  ’ ‘  and on your left, you can see me, ruining everything  ’ ‘  i know i have friends but i feel like i have no one to talk to about the shit that goes on in my head  ’ ‘  do you ever just realize how lucky you are that you did the weird thing that led to you being friends with the people are friends with?  ’ ‘  holding hands is so nice and should be done more  ’ ‘  things i don’t have time for: this shit  ’ ‘  i swear if one more adult asks me what i’m going to do with the rest of my life i’m going to fly into the sun  ’ ‘  my whole life consists of wondering whether or not to make the bitchy comment  ’ ‘  i live in a constant state of feminist rage  ’ ‘  i may legally be an adult but don’t be fooled, i have no idea what the hell i’m doing  ’ ‘  just straight things #16: not me  ’ ‘  why do ppl get so mad when girls like themselves  ’ ‘  girls get made of fun of for everything. might as well do what you want lol  ’ ‘  i wanna be hot enough to make people question their sexual orientation  ’ ‘  i stopped caring when i was like 3  ’ ‘  say no to kids, drugs  ’ ‘  i’m not crying there’s just overpriced college education in my eye  ’ ‘  i live in constant fear of being shit on by a bird  ’ ‘  if i go to hell i’m gonna torture everyone by continuously asking if it’s hot in here or if it’s just me  ’ ‘  drug dealer? no man. hug dealer. come here  ’ ‘  i’ll kiss you so hard don’t fuck w me  ’ ‘  hi good morning touch me inappropriately  ’ ‘  are we gonna fuckin hold hands tonight or what bitch  ’ ‘  yeah i think u cute.. so what?? wanna kiss about it??  ’ ‘  i don’t know what i’m feeling but there’s a lot of it  ’ ‘  why can’t stuffing my face with pizza make me attractive?  ’ ‘  i wish i could download clothes  ’ ‘  i don’t like your clothes take them off  ’ ‘  my favorite flavor of cake is more  ’ ‘  is that dick gluten free  ’ ‘  lactose and no tolerance for yo bitch ass  ’ ‘  i want someone who will light a fire in me  ’ ‘  i want someone who will light me on fire  ’ ‘  napping together is an important part of a relationship  ’ ‘  pros and cons of being my friend – cons: i’m an asshole, pros: i’m your asshole  ’ ‘  do you have those people that you’d go anywhere with unconditionally, like they could say ‘let’s go check out that dumpster’ and you’d be like ‘i’m in’  ’ ‘  what, with all due respect, the absolute fuck  ’ ‘  if u listen closely u can hear me not caring  ’ ‘  no logical decisions. we die like horror movie protagonists  ’ ‘  whenever you’re feeling suddenly calm it’s because i took your voodoo doll out for a picnic on a grassy hill  ’ ‘  90% of my day is being nervous  ’ ‘  50% idk 50% idc  ’ ‘  who wants to roadtrip w me we’ll hit as many ufo and paranormal hotspots  ’ ‘  will u still snapchat me when i am no longer young and beautiful  ’ ‘  just rolled my eyes so hard they fell off my head and now they’re rolling down the street  ’ ‘  houston i have so many problems  ’ ‘  today i’m feeling cloudy with a chance of sarcastic  ’ ‘  imho = in my hoe opinion  ’

[thecarnival-deactivated20210119]

@spookyvasey              ↳  * /  ℋilary  &&  𝓖eoff

JUST   HIS   LUCK  !!

 stuck,  with  one  of  the  biggest  idiots  in  vasey,  with  no  way  home.  was  this  gods  way  of  punishing  him  for  past  sins  ??   to  say  he  was  unhappy  would  be  the  understatement  of  the  century.  surely  they  wouldn’t  leave  them  there.  while  he  would  have  no  trouble  locking  the  door  on  some  poor  sod,  hilary  hoped  someone  had  the  common  sense  to  avoid  what  wrath  he  would  exact  on  vasey  should  he  be  left  in  hadfield.

 the  butcher  paced.  teeth  worrying  thumbnail  as  long  strides  were  taken  in  the  church  basement.   ‘  you  had  to  give  the  keys  to  the  fucking  german.  ’     he  growled  out,  narrowed  glare  being  cast  toward  the  shorter  man.     ‘  if  they  don’t  come  back  for  us,  it’s  you  who  PAYS  THE  PRICE.  ’ 

[spookyvasey]

    ACCIDENTS HAPPEN  . That’s what his mum always told him —— but that would NEVER be a suitable excuse for Hilary Briss. No , Geoff knew he was in the doghouse for this ; in fact , he’d like to kick his own ass right about now. He’d much rather be damned to an eternity in Vasey , with all of its  QUIRKS AND MISFORTUNES  , than whatever the fuck this place was.

    NORMALCY NEVER SUITED GEOFF. He’d learned this long ago. Now , he just wanted to get as FAR AWAY from Hadfield as possible , to a place he ( somewhat ) belonged in. And , with the way the butcher was looking at him , he’d like to get far away from Hilary as well.

    “  I’M FUCKIN’ SORRY, alright ? ” he said , tone full of exasperation , and , dare he say it , REMORSE . “ I didn’t think the bloody fool’d just lock us out like that ! ‘sides , I’m sure they’ve noticed we’re missing , and they’re on their way to bring us back RIGHT NOW . ”

    AS IF EITHER OF THEM were important enough for THAT.

[spookyvasey]

@spookakimbo​ ( papa lazarou ) // cont from x

TLOG STARTERS - ACCEPTING || @spookyvasey

               blank,   near   deadpan,   stare   was   given   in   response.   that   was  JIBBERISH,   even   for   him.   the   light   CLACK   of   gold   against   gold   could   be   heard   as   the   traveling   man   rubbed   dirt   clad   hands   together,   only   to   wave   left   hand   in   half   circular   motion   a   second   later.    ‘  can   you   repeat   that,   DAVE  ?? ’    spoken   in   unusually   gritty   voice,   papa   lazarou   only   leaned   in   CLOSER   to   his   future   wife,   pitch   black   eyes   boring   into   her   own.

     “  I SAID —— oh , never mind. ” DEFEATED , Pam assumed her normal demeanor : timid and quiet, with closed posture, as if she was trying to protect herself. She could only hold his gaze for a moment before INTIMIDATION ( or was it  FEAR ? ) took its toll , her head and eyes lowering as brows furrowed. “ My name isn’t  DAVE  , ” she mumbled , working hard not to crumble beneath his stare. “ I’m Pam Doove. I was in a commercial recently, for Greenwoods Orange Juice. Everyone else seems content to quote me, so I thought I might as well play along... Have you seen it, sir ? ”

[spookyvasey]

‘ some people call this “theatre in education”. I call it "AIDS in a van". ’ - Bernice to Pam

the league of gentlemen starters // @spookakimbo ( bernice woodall )

     “  OH , IT CAN’T BE THAT BAD , can it Reverend ? ” Soft-spoken as ever , she stood beside Bernice , watching as the familiar white van pulled into the parking lot. Count on Pam to be present any place  OPPORTUNITY  might knock —— even if LEGZ AKIMBO was relatively small and unheard of. One had to start SOMEWHERE , right ? Well , assuming she could make some semblance of a GOOD impression... “ If anything, it gets the kids off your hands for a while , doesn’t it ? ”