i s i t b a l s a m i c ?

* squish *

[dankmemeuniversity]

[talksoprettymoves-deactivated20]

CALM Titles + First Lines @5sos

[possessive-suggestions]

…They did what… to you? No. I will make them pay. You’re fucking mine. And nobody, nobody, lays a goddamn finger on you.

[trainthief]

Me when I get my car back from the mechanics and the adjustment on my seat is all wrong

[child-of-midas]

YouTubers when they hit a subscriber milestone:

Jenna Marbles when she hits a subscriber milestone:

[homoslovenc]

she's been carrying youtube on her back for a decade she fucking deserves several naps

[roseyblushess]

yes she does

[funibunniiie]

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I found Hozier’s “Let’s Play” YouTube channel and it was just him playing Minecraft and trying to befriend the creepers but he always ended up dying.

[iticaboopsyou]

I cannot tell you how disappointed I am that this is only a dream.

[amvs]

[such-justice-wow]

It sure was

[leosuncancervenus]

I just think you should sing no matter what you sound like and draw or paint no matter what it looks like

[rodrickheffeley]

best songs of the decade

1. whatever that feral church guy sings for his lover

2.

[outcastsuggestion]

it’s easier to say “im tired” than “im so sad and lonely i feel like there’s a weight in my chest and my body is so heavy i have no energy emotionally, physically or mentally to even move from my bed”

[rainberrycurses-archive-deactiv]

5SOS things to remember from this decade:

Luke's obsession with penguins

"Michael, you are YeLLinG."

"It's a volcano! Ah ah ah ah!"

"Oh, that's great! I'd love to sleep with you! Oh no, that sounds bad."

The tour vlogs

"Okay, thank you."

"Oh it’s blood… I mean EW BLOOD"

"Quiff it BABY! Ow!"

"Stop being a baby. Your hair is unquiffable"

"UNQUIFFABLE Ah! *flinches at hairspray*"

"Tadpoles are baby mosquitoes aren’t they?"

"It’s a COW luke!"

"So you go down this cliff." "I go down this cliff."

"I’m sorry, I didn’t invite you to this BBQ so why are you all up in my grill?"

Malum with the megaphones

"I’ll kill you with your own lemon tree."

"What’s a mattababy?"

"Fake betch"

The keeks

"Roberto"

Ketchup, the dog

"Sell the kids for food."

"iT sOUndS a BiT LoUd fOr An aCOusTiC seT, CaLum."

"You giant don't stop."

"_______, let's fucking dance!"

All of them dressed as 80s "sexy" rockstars for Halloween

Calum's pink glittery G-string

"Ashton, my best friend..."

The video where they dressed as retirees

"Let's play titanic. You'll be iceberg and I'll go down."

Their emo hairstyles

"Pretend I'm a girl!"

Ashton's Shaggy hair

"Valntyne"

Them calling Ashton the "dad" of the band

"I'm Calum Hood, I play BASS."

The Cocktail Chats

"Why can't we choose em'?" and "mA hEArt!"

Calum's pink "X" bass

"tHe TrUTh"

Them playing 5 Second Rule with Ellen

"I wanna be a jedi!" "You'll never be a jedi, you're an idiot."

Their obsession with Will Smith

"What kind of dog do you have?" "He has a fat one."

Smash, Mike-Ro-Wave, Dr. Fluke and Cal-Pal

Mint Michael

"I'm Michael, i-i play the triangle."

"Press my cheek against the glass... Glass? Gloss? I don't know who I am."

Luke's constant identity crisis

"Oh my God I just seen Calum's penis."

Ashton in oversized sweaters

"dO My bALLs!"

"I wear heels bigger than your dick."

Ashton's red hair

"iT's A ChOcoLAte miLK PaRTy!"

Calum buying a role of fabric to use as a blanket

"ALrigHT, LoS aNGeLes!!!"

Ashton's Late Late Show tattoo

"This one looks like it's gonna piss me off"

"You nasty, you little nasty!"

That Rolling Stone cover

"We are 5 Seconds of Summer. Summer? SummAh?"

"Fuck you, guys! I'm leaving too!"

"Heyyy, don't swear!"

"I do what I want! I'm punk rock!"

"No, you're not... yOU hAvE piNK HaiRrR."

"Because I like cheesesteaks"

Luke's lip ring

"You had me wrapped around your fucking finger."

Calum's curls

"I am often the hype man on stage, much like Lil Wayne."

Youngblood Era Ashton

"We like polka dots!"

"We like white shirts and leather jackets!"

"Hey man, go fuck yourself."

Luke's quiff

"Twist, bro!" "I'm twisting, mate!"

Calum's blonde streak hair

"We're having fun!"

Michael's red hair

"Is that you? "No, he's awful"

"Fuck me at a quarter to three"

500 Years of Winter - Pizza Song

"DoN't GEt bEtwEEn mE anD mY tEQuila!"

Bandana era Ashton

"I don't know who I am."

Luke in plaid shirts

"You guys are such cunts today."

All of them in black ripped skinny jeans

"I don't like people, I'm not a people person."

"These are my parents." "What happened to them?"

The Buzzfeed video where they read thirsty tweets

"You wanna know where it is? It's at your mom's house."

Their cover of I Miss You

"bUt iS iT baLSamic?"

"Pure fuego."

"It's like you don't even know me sometimes."

Ashton not drinking the pig blood

"Michael, wHat DiD sHe sAy???" and all of Michael's answers to it

"Youngbleh, sayuami, sayuami, out yolaif."

Calum's "Empathy" hoodie

Ashton in glasses

"ThE BoDaCiOUs, tHe CAaaLUm hOOd!"

Literally all of MYT Live

"That's cRaZY."

Their cover of American Idiot

Their tank tops

"Is that marijuana?"

Ashton drinking from that boot

[that-phat-chic-deactivated20200]

This is the Baby Money Yoda, reblog in the next 60 seconds of seeing this to receive a blessing from our green bean prince.

[darillium-night]

Update from the man himself

[holdtightposts]

The Porn Guy aka The Nice Guy aka The Canadian side of Pornhub aka SFW Pornhub’s REAL NAME is Ryan Creamer. No joke, that is legit his real name.

Also this.

Which led him to this.

Bless this man.

[the-nightman783]

[lynati]

I can appreciate him and the service he’s providing independently of the shitshow that is the platform he’s hosted on.

[gottasleepgottastudy]

I wish I could like… download languages into my brain.

[heavensickness]

The fact that people actually listened to Greek philosophers is crazy. Imagine living in 300 B.C or something, sniffing bay leaves & this old dude comes to you and says "We are not living in the real world... This is just a Shadow World" and you say "aight"

[lecataste]

[showerponderings]

“Chainsaw companies not using horror movies as advertisement is a missed opportunity”

— http://ifttt.com/missing_link?1575616761