MODERN GUY

they/he • 25 • creature of want

[bl4z33467]

Please use it we miss him

[grimeclown]

I got a job at a gas station across from a casino and a guy keeps coming in to buy whole cartons of cigarettes and talks in the third person calling himself "snake eyes pete" and every time I tell him his total hes like "tell ya what if old Pete rolls a snake eyes why dont you give it to him for free?" and he rolls the same set of loaded dice on the counter and it does not matter how many times he rolls snake eyes I will not give him the cartons for free he gets so mad

[grimeclown]

Snakeyes Pete is from Toronto he gave me a button once that said "Canadians have the best luck" and i said i thought that was the Irish and he said "I fucking hate the irish" and i said okay

[adonischildsupportcase]

[ask-pacman]

Met this perpeller hat dip shit on crypto networking he was tacky as fuck and horibly ugly but i needed $7 so i took him to the half bath, pulled a total vacum on his shit and he like fell over knocked his head on the orante copper toilet seat dude was laying there for weeks lol

[dogpuppy]

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

hey girl. you can call me taylor farms lettuce. cause i'm trying to blow that ass out from coast to coast

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

hey girl. you can call me taylor farms lettuce. cause i wanna make you squirt in all 50 states

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

hey girl. you can call me taylor farms lettuce. because literally everybody has heard by now that i'm not allowed back at taco bell

[factbot]

Clint Eastwood is co creator of the board game puffin

[snoopylovessoup]

[muntzerism-diggerism]

Best part of following this account is that there's a new Ogre Blowjob Hell once every two months

[gerardwayjigglephysics]

"how will you ever love yourself?" 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️

[ill-serve-it-in-draag]

YOU MUST FIRST DIE UNTO YOURSELF 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️

[buddwyer]

ultra rare ice cream flavor: shoplifted and defallonated

[buddwyer]

[captain-price-returns]

Interesting things happening on Reddit right now

[sandmandaddy69]

[dogpuppy]

[artist-magritte-deactivated2020]

The month of the grape harvest, 1959, Rene Magritte

Medium: oil,canvas

[swordoftheberserkgutsrage]

come on dude come outside its the month of the grape harvest.

[neuro-light]

Don’t usually go on Facebook because it’s fucking stupid but this. Was too funny.

[carrotssss]