a constellation of self

mid20s they/it/he/etc+ ~a place to drop our thoughts, watch the ripples, a journal of sorts~ --im gonna drop the filter sometimes.-- Under 18? Move along. *gonna be a freak, gonna put raw poetry, maybe weird writings, art, more* -might tag for mature content, might not?- *we're going to write from several different places in our soul*

[stardust-and--bones]

hmmhmm~

Dunno what to feel. Many things resurfacing, many things sweeping under. a disaster beast, the bird chirps.

trying our best, chirps another.

all the birds lined up on a wire, singing their songs in hopes of breaking through all the road noise.

The dogs prowl in the forest. Its wild in there. Monsters and men. Beasts that say your name. Bite at them raw and fierce, bend the space to your will and take the space that is yours.

nothing is yours.

no nothing. know nothing.

ramble your mind. scribbles on the wall.

Carve it in your skull like a spell. Protect within. Breathe it out. Bend and mend when you break.

How does one feel when they have been dead? How does one feel when they have been alive? How does one feel?

[stardust-and--bones]

dreams. Dreams... sometimes real, sometimes an idea.

sometimes a memory.

I'm so angry with you. Hah.. how funny, i learned how to be angry with you. That's all i was for so long.

even when we were more...

i was anger. Now im not always sure... but deep in my soul? That fire still rages...

i had a dream about you. you enraged me so much, i had to make sure they seemed.. safe. Knowing you, even the look of it does nothing. But i can't pull them out of your fucked up land.

... i dreamed you were going to seek therapy. i hope you did. i hope you found even a semblance of cure to that anger.. the anger you gave me. The anger i had to change.

i tire of you. i want to miss you. and my heart wont let me. im glad. fuck you.

[stardust-and--bones]

found a cute lil puppy.

Think im gonna have to bite her. Lick her clit a lil..

mutts gotta help out pups and other cute dogs however they need it, thats what they're there for.

[stardust-and--bones]

changing. changing.

As it does. Time changes all that allow it. And even those that do not.

how will we change as time goes?

oh what a beauty it will be to witness when finally there.

what a beauty that stardust formed and collected to get to this moment,

the moment before change. the moment of change. the moment after change.

[mindpalce0fmine]

Listen, I don’t make the rules but every needy puppy boy should have his soft tummy full of strap right now. Again, I don’t make the rules but cute mutts should be bred until their legs are shaking and their dumb puppy brain can’t focus on anything else but how good it feels to be stuffed and fucked

[mindpalce0fmine]

Listen, I don’t make the rules but every needy puppy boy should have his soft tummy full of strap right now. Again, I don’t make the rules but cute mutts should be bred until their legs are shaking and their dumb puppy brain can’t focus on anything else but how good it feels to be stuffed and fucked

[stardust-and--bones]

Thinkin late night thoughts. Need to go to bed.need to get the thoughts out

Purple Dragon and bunny.

Skeletons in our closet.

Something monstrous.

Something flighty.

A flock of birds.

Leaves on the wind.

thought it'd be hot, if our partner locked and sold us. wanna suck a lot. And be pretty. And handsome. Wanna be a good pet, good for use.. i like that feel. Or at least the idea of it.. maybe will have to explore with them sometime.

[stardust-and--bones]

bein odd. lettin it be okay.

flirtin with girls. lettin it be okay.

lovin my baby. lettin it be okay.

existing as me, in all my ways, in all my space. lettin it be okay.

[stardust-and--bones]

we had a thought recently that we wanted to put on here, maybe, if we wrote it in our journal we'll come back and put it here...

alas, for now, tis gone~

[radicalgraff]

"War crimes don't hide sex crimes"

Spotted in Ventura, California

[stardust-and--bones]

knot.

[stardust-and--bones]

rough draft *

how confusing... the world.

us.

how odd. that nothing will ever quite be easy to tell .

changing. that is nature . but how beautiful. that moment, when it shines .

light glints off it. a sparkling prism. color. and for a moment, things settle, solidify, meld.

i want you to know. i don't want to doubt. i don't believe i'm an imposter. or so wrong. i think i might belong. unrecognizable as i am. something odd . something confusing.

i reach... please grab on.

i want us to go, not one, together.

no one left behind. not anymore.

[stardust-and--bones]

had our first group therapy session today, along side the usual solo therapy. hah, to be honest i was going to write this up sooner but I fell down a rabbit hole of sorts... i keep doin that lately.

my new goal from solo therapy is to just do some stretches or mindful activities like laying for a bit or something. I decided to do a bit of stretching today, like we used to for dance and flag.

we're trying to reduce responding to situations both internal and otherwise with judgement. it doesn't help if we beat ourself up over what we said years ago or hours ago.. i feel foolish. frequently. i question the way i perceive and live and function.

How odd, how things have changed. How I've changed and yet I frequently forget that i'm no longer who I was. Sometimes I need to be reminded, remind myself even, that i'm no longer in the place i thought was a home. i'm in something that i would call home. no longer around those who made home unsafe.

... we've been going for so long and i'm tired. i worry i'm deluding myself. waking up every day, i convince myself to make it through while dreading the idea of doing this for so long... as if i sometimes don't recognize the death that will come my way, for i've blurred that concept with my own image of death, the one i've been for so long.

my bones ache. long lasting frustration. unanswered pain. the death of passion, of self, of past belief.

sometimes, its so beautiful. this image of reality i get to watch. sometimes, its nothing but gray blur. do i need to know what's real? or do i need to accept real will never be one thing.

[wordslikesilver]

I’m so tired of algorithms. I’m so tired of advertising. I’m so tired of clickbait. I’m so tired of microtransactions. I’m so tired of subscriptions. I’m so tired of the death of passion. I’m so tired of LLMs. I’m so tired of corporate morality. I’m so tired of being a number. I’m so tired of manufactured scarcity. I’m so tired of slop. I’m so tired of Omelas.

I hate how it feels to live under capitalism. I hate how empty and hollow and dead it makes me feel as an animal. Get out of me. Give me back my world. Give me back the future. Get out of my body. Stop killing us all you filthy, evil, wicked people.

When will you die so that we can all be free of you? I think I wouldn’t be so tired anymore if you all just dropped dead tomorrow.

[stardust-and--bones]

His teeth tore through their flesh and blood.   iron heat drenched his maw .  Their rib cage cracked open and he was drunk  off the    inside    of their  heart and soul . 

Oh to so sweetly hold them,  to ensure that no one else would ever get this chance,  to know them so deeply.   Personally.       To feel everything they were slip away inside himself.              what intimacy. 

if only he could return the feeling to them..  maybe in another time ,   they're grinding his bones and breathing him in . Pressing his broken soul into jewels to adorn their skin. weaving him into them.

May  time   be ever so kind, to force  the stardust of two into one next time..   let them twist amongst each other like the muscles he tore through to get here.  Let them into one another  ,  blending, mixing…    to gether .