empathogen by lannistarks on AO3
- follows ginny miller, marcus baker, abby littman, and max baker living in new york and attending grand army high school
- explores the four characters above and their relationships with each other, their families, and peers
- dives deeper into some of the supporting characters who don't get a lot of personal shine in canon such as austin, norah, padma, bracia, hunter, wolfe, sophie, tris, and silver. even the random one-offs like riley, scott, and kate.
- explores fun teen shenanigans (because those are very important !!)
‘I’ve been meaning to say hi,’ he says, massaging the knuckles on his right middle finger. ‘Just haven't had the chance. I met your mom, though.’
She fights the urge to roll her eyes, instead offering a tight smile. ‘She can be really friendly.’
He tilts his head. ‘She wasn’t that friendly,’ he hums. ‘Asked me for weed, actually.’
‘Yeah, well, she can also be kind of a bitch.’ Jesus, Ginny. The words slip out faster than she can process them—it’s just natural, thinking that her mother is a bitch. ‘Do you wanna be reimbursed or something?’
He lets out another small smile. ‘I just wanted to say hey.’
‘I wanna be not here,’ she whispers. Closes her eyes. ‘I wanna be Donna.’
Donna Sheridan, of course, sans pregnancy. She wants to just pack a suitcase and fuck off to somewhere far away. Find her own Kalokairi. She wants friends she’ll be excited to see well into her forties, friends she’ll do dance routines with and laugh with and have forever. She wants love. Pure and white-hot and dizzying. A love that tastes like summer rain.
Eyes still closed, she hears a sharp intake of breath from Abby.
‘I wanna live. Be alive.’
Max furrows her brows. ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’
‘Let’s see: I’ve got a deaf husband, a delinquent son—’ Marcus lets out a disapproving ‘Hey!’ on that note, ‘—and a lesbian daughter. They’re really religious people, honey, and I respect it, but I’m not sure I’d feel safe, and I most certainly don’t want to deal with their judgment.’
‘Don’t put words in my mouth, Maxine,’ Ellen warns. She doesn’t have a stern bone in her body, though, so it comes out all light and wobbly. ‘Feeling judged is not the same thing as feeling ashamed. I’m not ashamed of my family. But are you telling me that you’re one hundred percent comfortable when you’re there? Do they even know you’re gay?’
Max gulps. Gently places her fork on her plate. ‘I don’t see why they’d need to know.’
Abby lets out a yawn. ‘I had cheesecake at Ginny’s yesterday.’
‘Oh, yeah, your new mystery friend,’ Nancy hums. ‘Toss that nutmeg in there.’ Abby does as she says.
‘She’s not a mystery friend. You’ve literally met her.’
‘Briefly, and fleetingly,’ she emphasises. ‘You dragged her away so fast I didn’t even get her last name.’
‘You’ve just been spending a lot of time with her lately. I never even hear about Max and Norah anymore, which is weird because according to Bev, Norah and Max are still close.’
‘Mom,’ she groans. ‘It’s not a big deal, okay? People change. Friends move on.’
Her heart does this little thunder in her chest. Roaring like something’s trying to come out.
People had called it the perfect role for her, and it was only in the eighth grade that she realised they meant that she was spoiled and aggressive and generally unpleasant to those who weren’t her best friends or something. Yeah, well, maybe you guys just don’t know what real passion looks like, she’d wanted to go back in time and scream in their faces. Chin up, Maxi, Abby had said in the spinning teacups when Ellen and Clint had taken them all to Coney Island to cheer her up, and they’d shared an ice cream sandwich as Norah chose an old-fashioned corndog because Bev doesn’t like it when she has dessert before dinner.
He takes a moment to compose himself. Thinks of cold water and grey rainclouds and, God, he’s such a douche—he thinks of Padma. Pretty, super understanding and forgiving Padma who’ll write the greatest heartbreak songs of all time about him and when she’s famous she’ll tell her fans not to hunt down her loser ex but they’ll find him and give him dirty looks, anyway, and maybe a tomato will be thrown his way and he’ll probably deserve it. He looks up at Ginny, and her brown eyes seem to brim with tears.
empathogen by lannistarks on AO3 !!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/78782206
yousharknotpass
romaincrisis
gummygunk
origamiaround