Evading the Inevitable

Welcome to AvPD hell If you need somewhere to hide while avoiding your Avoidant Personality Disorder, you've come to the right place! This is a venting blog and will also have things relating to bipolar, PTSD, misophonia, and psychosis at times too.

[philosophomoric]

“the ways you have learned to survive may not be the ways you wish to continue to live“

[slow-drowned-angels]

“Do it scared” but please realize that, if you Do It Scared too much and don’t let yourself rest + relax + have fun in between, you will fuck yourself up. If you “do it scared” all day every day, you will burn out badly and quickly. Sometimes this is temporarily necessary but please keep this in mind.

[barnables]

When you “do it scared” eventually you’re supposed to be less scared, eventually doing it scared is supposed to teach you the worst won’t happen, or it won’t be as bad as you think it is, or that the best outcomes are worth it, or you’re more capable than you thought you were. If you do it scared over and over and you’re still scared and you’re always scared, maybe it was never about pushing yourself, maybe something bigger is going on and what you really need is to be kind to yourself while you figure out what that is.

[konoko]

[blueberryratz-deactivated202512]

[spoonie-living]

Extreme heat can be dangerous for people taking psychiatric medication

Psychiatric medications can interfere with the body's ability to regulate temperature, and most patients don't know, experts say.

Just a little PSA for all our mental health (and chronic pain*) spoonies out there! A lot of doctors neglect to mention this little side effect, which means a lot of us are suffering extra from the heat without knowing why.

*Many psych meds are used to treat chronic pain as well, if you didn’t know!

[spooniestrong]

[murderandjam]

What?!

[roachie-paradise]

JUMPSCARE, main blog post

brb creature emojis for you and your fellow avoidants, free to use, credit is nice but just dont claim it as your own >_<

inspired by @/mindmojis emoji post!!! (link)

[officialgaryoak]

cool self isolation bro now what if the people you’re hiding from truly love you and want to care for you

[puppygirl-hornyposting2]

[scuffledig]

if u take zoloft and/or spironolactone be careful in the hot months u will dehydrate and be prone to overheating. drink. Water

[evildietcoke]

Like the bottom text next to the asterisk says, there are more medications that cause this problem than listed. Please search for any medications you take if they cause heat problems <3

[ashitomarisu]

Note: Brintellix -> Trintellix for those who didn’t know this brand changed trademark names.

[elldritch-horror]

Spicy-brained friends, I would like to propose an update to the very useful ‘if you hate everyone, eat, if everyone hates you, sleep, and if you hate yourself, shower’ mantra to live by

Have you suddenly become a petty, hateful little gremlin who thinks people should face the firing squad for (checks notes) leaving teabags on the counter, breathing loudly, or daring to exist in the same space as you? Perhaps mundane and reasonable requests like ‘hey, we agreed to hang out now, let’s hang out’ make you want to scream and move to a yurt in the woods.

You. Are. Overstimulated.

People talk a lot about being overstimulated, and the physical/mental effects of it. What I haven’t seen is people talking about what it does emotionally, and it took me an embarassingly long time to link up those nitpicky, resentful emotions with the state of overstimulation/meltdown/shutdown.

These feelings do not mean that you’re a bad person! They probably aren’t how you actually feel about the people around you. They probably do mean that your nervous system is at its absolute limit and any request/demand/stimulus is Too Much and taking you into fight or flight territory.

Go lie down in a dark room for an hour, or find somewhere safe and familiar to stim for a bit. If it’s happening a lot, schedule yourself regular low-stimulation shutdown time

Signed: someone who moved in with their nearest and dearest only to have a massive crisis of faith about Suddenly Hating All of Them. I don’t hate them, it’s just overstimulating living with people. If I can spare anyone else a similar 9 months of suspecting that they may actually be a bit of a shit person, then this post is worth it!

[itseattherich]

Weirdly specific symptoms of AvPD:

- Not sharing new hobbies or impulse buys with close friends or family or partners, keeping "unecessary" things secret, people might accuse you of being too secretive

- Impulse to delete social media updates after publishing them

- Impulse to delete comments on social media platforms when they "preform" badly

- "Paralyzis" in social settings - you have an idea of what to say, but it feels physically impossible, and when it's too late and people have moved on from the topic you give up

- Immediate, self destructive, and violent regret after saying something, anything

- Ghosting people when the immediate high of someone giving you attention falter, not because you don't like them anymore, but because you forget you can interact with people when it's not "extraordinary"

- Being overly generous to make sure people like you, paying for things, giving gifts etc

- Forced proximity and/or enemies to lovers seems the only way that someone can fall in love with you

- Secondhand embarrasment from TV or other media is unbearably painful, even if it's a "bad" character doing something wrong

- You spend hours on thinking how people percieve you, and it's both thrilling and terrifying

- Saving/screenshotting funny things you think of sharing with a friend, but you change your mind and only keep them to yourself

Feel free to add more❤️

@tavpdfw ✨

[tortiefrancis]

people with personality disorders are still capable of love, affection and caring about others, but it's okay to struggle with those things.

you aren't evil for not feeling love, hating showing or receiving affection or not caring. it doesn't make you a bad person, or less deserving of respect.

[stolligaseptember]

god my brain is so hardwired to feel ashamed after any social interaction that even after there's objectively nothing to feel ashamed over i still feel terrible

[probablyavpd]

Not many people talk about how deep emotional neglect hurts you.

I’m afraid to want things. I’m afraid to ask for help. I’m afraid to tell someone something if they seem in a bad mood. I can’t process when someone is nice to me. I can’t handle rejection, but my brain literally short circuits if someone gives me a compliment to the point where sometimes the rejection is better.

There are lots of overlap with emotional abuse, but emotional neglect hurts just as much. And it’s even worse that it usually goes undetected, so a lot of people can’t tell they’re being neglected until it’s too late.

[speakingofpsychosis]

[izzycodes]

I like this a lot.

[naamahdarling]

Brb replacing "I should" with "I have the option/opportunity to" in my internal monologue re: beating myself up over shit that needs doing. Let's see if that works.

[naamahdarling]

It actually really did help and I did the laundry and cat boxes. Guess I'll keep trying that one.

[paleograffiti]

My psychiatrist told me this early on working with him. Every time I said "I should" he would be horrified and urge me to replace it with "I could." It took a lot of practice but my life is so much better for it because it replaces the pressure of external obligations with my own agency.

[aphony-cree]

Sometimes it helps to replace “I have to” with “I get to”

Thinking “I have to water my houseplants” makes it a chore. But thinking “I get water my houseplants” reminds you that you keep houseplants for a reason and you can enjoy the time you spend with them

[thesixthstar]

every time i'm caught on a "should" i try to reframe it as "if I want [a certain result], then doing [thing] can help me get there". It does double duty of taking the guilt out of the "should" while still reinforcing the motivation of WHY my brain pinged "should" in the first place. Or it even works to make me realize that i care less about the result than i think i'm """meant""" to and I can safely de-prioritize it

[justcaytlin]

When I start getting too deep into the "I should"s, my therapist says "don't should yourself." It's dumb, it's silly, and it sticks with me haha

[mockiatoh]

You can’t deserve a person’s love. You’ll drive yourself crazy thinking like that. They either love you, or they don’t. That doesn’t mean you weren’t good enough for them to love you, because love isn’t something you earn by being good enough. It isn’t something that can be quantified or doled out. Don’t blame yourself for not being loved how you need to, just teach yourself how to look for love where love lives.

[mockiatoh]

This isn’t just about romantic love, or even skewed towards romantic love, although it does apply there too. One of the hardest things I’ve ever had to accept is that my mother simply wasn’t someone who was capable of loving me, and there is no version of me that I could have ever been that would have earned that love. But with acceptance came healing. I was able to love myself more instead of resenting myself for not being more than any one person could be.

[mockiatoh]

Are you listening? Even love for yourself isn’t earned. It is a kindness you give yourself.