Despite the poker face she had managed to work out of experience, she could not hide from herself the JEALOUSY she felt towards women with s t a b i l i t y ––a life extremely different from her own. Had Jolene asked her if she has ever felt such rage before, she would have nodded her headshamelessly; but for a MAN ? Annabelle became visibly thoughtful ( and slightly annoyed ) at having to remember if she has ever felt jealous for a man, and yet, finding none…She knew there must beat least one of many heartbreaks where she has experienced that jealousy, but the only thing in her memory were the TEARS she shed and the FURY in eyes, but she could not say the same thing about t h e f e e l i n g ( because she doesn’t FEEL anymore ) A heartlessly chuckle came out of her sealed lips; it was no mockery, just simple IRONY
“Why should I feel jealous about a man who doesn’t bother to feel the same way about me ? Jolene dear, you should know MEN are only wearing wings in one’s mind if desired…which is why it will take a man out of this world to make me feel jealous about him.”
“But, Annabelle, sometimes you just can’t HELP it! He makes you care, he makes you sick at the thought of him being sweet on anyone else, because he did those same things with you! Ohhh, I’m beside myself, Annabelle, I really am. I’ve felt this way before, back home you know, but I was just a girl then. It’s been years since I’ve gone cold just thinking about a man with some other woman!”
Distraught reigned in her expression suddenly, a dancer’s hand moving quickly through her blonde satin hair and causing it just the slightest of frizz ----- truly she was descending into drunken misery, a transfiguration of beauty contorted into sour dismay. The Merlot in her glass took her attention only briefly as she swirled it in a small, dark vortex, ceasing this motion to look back into the other woman’s face with trouble brewing in her glimmering azure stare. Pink lips set into a concerned, rosebud pucker.
“I can’t help myself, it’s like an obsession ---- I can’t stop thinking about it. And.. and I’m SCARED, scared of.. what this will mean for me.” She stopped, not too abruptly, but obviously didn’t elaborate on what she meant by this. Silly girl soon felt a tension of saying too much. She didn’t know how much Annabelle knew about her and her men, but it had to be hot gossip in circles when she was not near. Surely the darker haired woman knew about her and Andrew Ryan, aware of how her status only soared after taking as his mistress. And as Annabelle had to know this, it made her other secret all the more precious to keep.
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