Star Wars Pain Me

She/her | 35 | 🔞 | Ewan McGregor stan | Obi-Wan Kenobi shipper | Bottom!Obi-Wan connoisseur | Starpains (Koukaiaru) on AO3 MY ASKS ARE ALWAYS OPEN

[starpains]

Starpains Fanfic Masterlist

Most of these are Obikin, with one Obimaul exception. I starred 🌟 my faves and tagged 🎨 fics with embedded art. The list is alphabetical, except for the series, where it's chronological. A lot of these are my responses to various prompts I've received - if you want to prompt me, read this post first. You can see all the prompts I've received so far in my prompts tag.

I have also written some tumblr exclusive ficlets which you can find in this tag.

Chaptered Fics:

Inappropriate (Complete 8/8) 🌟 🎨 Obikin | Mature | 42,027 words | GFFA The one where Obi-Wan touches a holocron and sprouts wings, which are very sensitive to Anakin's presence. Additional scenes can be read here.

Not Your Average Pet (WIP 5/?) 🎨 Obikin | Explicit | ??k+ words | Modern/Werewolf AU The one where psychiatrist Ben unwittingly adopts a wolf in California, only to discover it's not a wolf at all.

The Narrative Effect (Complete 20/20) 🎨 Obikin | Explicit | 101,371 words | Modern AU The one where Anakin discovers Gay Erotica and is thrown into a sexual awakening.

The Velvet Cage (Complete 3/3) Obikin | Explicit | 35,221 words | GFFA My contribution to the 2025 Obikin Reverse Bang The one where Obi-Wan and Anakin are sent on a mission to find the abducted Senator Chuchi on a planet reminiscent of Earth in the 1930s.

Your Mite (WIP 4/6) 🎨 Obimaul | Explicit | 40k+ words | Modern AU The one where Maul is the captain of a highly specialized recon team, whose life changes drastically after an IED explosion forces the field surgeon Obi-Wan to amputate both his legs.

Touch Series: 🌟

Touch, Tug, Tangle (Oneshot) Obikin | Explicit | 13,695 words | Modern AU The one where a racing journalist, Anakin, meets his favourite movie star, Ben Kenobi, and realizes he's very into his hands. Also, Ben is apparently very into him.

Trace, Tease, Take (Oneshot) 🎨 | Sequel to TTT Obikin | Explicit | 16,571 words | Modern AU The one where they decide to do a public coming out after a year and a half of dating and have to face all that entails.

All I Want Series:

All I Want for Christmas (Is a Dildo) (Oneshot) Obikin | Teen and Up Audiences | 5,312 Words | Modern AU The one where Anakin is a mall Santa and there is one guy in the line, who does not seem like he belongs there.

All I Want for New Year's (Is the Real Thing) (Oneshot) Obikin | Explicit | 6,360 Words | Modern AU The one where Ben gets the Christmas gift that mall Santa promised him with a week's delay.

Feel Human Series:

Make You Feel Human (Oneshot) Obikin | Explicit | 6,949 words | GFFA The one where Anakin decides to use the Force to make Obi-Wan squirm during the Jedi Council meetings.

Feel Human Yet? (Oneshot) Obikin | Explicit | 2,830 words | GFFA The one where Anakin decides to use the Force while they're 69-ing.

Other Fics:

A Gift to the Self (Oneshot) 🌟 Obikin | Explicit | 9,164 words | GFFA The one where Kenobi-show Era Ben travels back in time and meets The Phantom Menace-Era Obi-Wan, has sex with himself and thus saves the galaxy and makes Obikin happen thanks to it.

Knobs and Nerves (Oneshot) Obikin | Explicit | 3,546 words | Modern AU The one where Obi-Wan goes to IKEA and gets a new perspective on bedposts. He has some fun with a bedpost when he gets back home, unaware that he is being watched through binoculars by his neighbor, Anakin.

More than a Shadow, More than a Dream (Oneshot) 🌟 Obikin | Mature | 2,408 words | GFFA Companion piece to AsteroidMiyoko's Even as a Shadow, Even as a Dream The one where Anakin Skywalker gets transported into a future where Obi-Wan is mourning his loss.

More than Words (Oneshot) Obikin | Teen and Up Audiences | 3,957 words | GFFA The one where they end up almost drowning after a viscious aerial chase.

The Only Language Left (Oneshot) Obikin | Explicit | 3,610 words | GFFA The one where Obi-Wan and Anakin don't know how to talk about what happened on Kadavo and find a different language entirely.

Through the Cellar Door (Oneshot) 🌟 🎨 Obikin | Explicit | 5,037 words | Modern AU The one where a kilt-wearing corporate bigwig Ben gets buggered in his wife's wine cellar by his son's mercurial best friend.

Trick or Treat, Muffin Man (Oneshot) Obikin | Teen and Up Audiences | 3,146 words | Modern AU The one where Obi-Wan keeps feeding Anakin muffins every Halloween for over a decade.

Unrestrained (Oneshot) Obikin | Explicit | 10,537 words | GFFA The one where Obi-Wan stumbles upon some pollen which temporarily turns him into a Sith. Apparently, that means he wants to fuck his former padawan.

[starpains]

Anakin as a Paralympic gold medal winner getting invited to participate in Dancing with the Stars. Obi-Wan as one of the judges on the show. The taboo of that gets me all tingly. Of course nothing could happen when the show’s on, just a lot of heated stares and secret pining.

Also, because fate has a sense of humor, he’d get paired with Padmé, who wins almost every season. So he stays on the show till the end, torturing both himself and Obi-Wan, while the fans keep pushing him and Padmé together, even though they only vibe as friends.

Anakin is such a brat that he’d rage about Obi-Wan giving him lower marks, certain Obi-Wan is punishing him for something. Meanwhile, Obi-Wan only gives him lower marks because he’s convinced the whole world can see him barely managing to keep his inappropriate crush hidden, and he thinks this will stop people from noticing.

[brownskinandlemon]

no honestly on mustafar obi-wan should have heard anakin out and been like:

“yes, sweetheart, let’s team up and defeat palpatine and steal his empire. yeah for sure. okay, and we should get padmé to a hospital right? yeah, let’s do that cause she’s definitely gonna come around to those fascist ideas of yours—heh, i know i did. no yeah, you’re the sith lord boss, my dear. ahah. okay, and should we get some food and sleep in our system too? yeah good idea my sweet anakin i mean lord vader. after you. :)”

and then once he kinda calmed down been like ok… so this plan to kill palp? totally. like immediately after that though? we’re gonna have a serious talk sweetie but don’t worry about that just yet.

[bouchelangelo]

kiss

[anarchistmemedistro]

[girlboss-revan]

was messing with some new brushes and so. i have this now

[beauteesleep]

In the Halls of Healing

[starpains]

Finally got my hands on Son of Dathomir and Obi-Wan crying mid-battle is apparently confirmed canon.

[vielens]

[starpains]

If you're still taking kiss prompts, what about this one ? 👀

"The silent kiss where words would ruin it, where they know and don’t need to say a damn thing."

Hi, so... I know it's been like 8 months since you've sent me this prompt, babe. I promised back then that I would write it, and so, here I am, strutting in on my horse, late as fuck, wondering where everyone's gone to xD.

Anyway, since it ended up beng almost 4k, I decided to post it on AO3, and not in the reply here.

More than Words

The canyon walls are too narrow, the river is too close, and the droid tri-fighters behind them are gaining.

Anakin can feel Obi-Wan beside him, can hear the panic breaking through his voice, can sense the shape of an impossible way out just ahead.

All he has to do is fly straight at the wall.

[beauteesleep]

[alilyhn]

dream brother, my killer, my lover

[velveteencigarette]

i am having Thoughts

[starpains]

Hi, good day! Hope you are doing ok! I came to say I really love your writting, its beautiful, every time I am feeling down or want to have a good read, I came back to your fics.

"Inappropriate" is one of my favorite Obikin fanfics ever, and I was wondering if there's a chance you'd give me permission to bind that story for my personal use.

I hope I'm not being too inconvenient, because I truly appreciate all your talent and the stories you have written for the Obikin fandom.

Thank you and hope you have a good day! 😁😁

Awh 🥹. This is such a lovely message. I’m so happy you enjoy my work this much. Also thank you for asking if I’m ok with binding. That’s very considerate. Bind away 🥰🥰.

[starpains]

On the Em Dash and AI

Apparently we’ve reached the stage of internet literacy where seeing an em dash in prose is now considered forensic proof of AI.

Genuine question. Do you guys know grammar. Like. At all.

I’m asking as a non-native speaker because I honestly don’t know what the baseline is in English-speaking countries anymore.

I started learning English when I was three. Yes, three. My parents found the only kindergarten in our entire district that had English on the schedule in the 90s in a post-communist country and tossed me in there. I’m pretty sure the teacher herself was operating on vibes and a phrasebook, but it was enough for my child brain to latch onto the language like a white tablecloth latching onto pinot noir.

(Literally nothing better at three than learning that pies is dog and kot is cat.)

And I loved it. Capital L loved it in the way other kids love dinosaurs or Peppa Pig. I was obsessed with words. With structure. With how sentences could work.

I literally prefer English to Polish so much that I sometimes have to use the translator to find words in Polish when I write a fuckin’ work email. My brain is half this half that when offline. I am just glad my hubs is the same, because he doesn’t double take when my sentences end up bilingual.

I learned half of my vocabulary reading Harry Potter pornfic on FF.net (yes, do the math). This was before the second-to-last instalment even came out. Insane. But I wasn’t there for the porn. I genuinely could not have cared less about what was going on in those scenes. I was there for the new words. The sentence structures. The pauses that conveyed emotion. The ellipses. The broken words. The punctuation I didn’t fully understand yet. The grammar that made my head spin in the best possible way.

I’ll never forget my British Council teacher asking us to list sentence connectors in class, and me saying “albeit” because I’d just encountered it the previous day. “Did you just say ‘albeit’,” asked the freckled, ginger-haired, ginger-bearded man—the epitome of Ireland, except from Tennessee.

I took notes on the difference between hyphens, en dashes, and em dashes when I was fifteen. I made flashcards for punctuation rules. Entire lessons of literature classes were spent discussing when to use a colon, when a semicolon actually strengthens a sentence, when a dash introduces interruption versus expansion.

And now I’m on the precipice of thirty-six, being told that using an em dash makes my writing look like ChatGPT.

Also, as implied before, I am Polish. The em dash as it’s used rhetorically inside English prose doesn’t really exist in Polish writing in the same way. Our punctuation rules are entirely different, to the point that we format dialogue differently, using what looks like an em dash at the start of a line to indicate that a character is speaking.

So yeah, my use of the em dash is entirely learned. Taught as a stylistic tool in English prose by English literature enthusiasts.

Foreign speakers often have to learn these conventions consciously.

And now apparently using them correctly is suspicious.

Fuck this.

[asteroidstarfield]

My post for the @obikin-valentine-exchange !!

@bird-prince-art and I were talking about Go Go Gadget Sailor Moon Obikin months ago, and I finally drew it XD

[bloodorangeblackhole]

Red string Padawan braid of fate.