I could write three long metas about his toxicity and why I dislike him but I don't want to tire my fingers for him. 😑
Maybe because of his slut-shaming behaviour?
Oh and what is this? Ah yes, Mal being angry that Alina found happiness away from him:
I'm so sorry Mal that Alina wasn't tortured so you could feel okay. I'm so sorry that she didn't feel insecure enough to run back in your arms, needing you and depending on you like you always wanted for her.
You know, that's the thing with Mal. He did nothing to Alina.
Not when his "friend" was mocking her appearance (and yes this is serious for me because I too have a very thin body and people from my own family have mocked me for it. So it's no joke).
Not when she was apparently sad that he fucked around girls knowing that she knew.
He did literally nothing until Alina wanted to fuck the Darkling and showed interest for him.
(slut shaming her even here)
From then on he ✨magically✨ noticed her out of nowhere and he said that "now I see you".
BULLSHIT!!
According to Mal, it's okay if he fucks girls every other night but it's not okay when Alina wants to do it with a man that....I don't know. Supported her power and abilities maybe?
And he seems constantly so concerned that she has fucked him that he apparently doesn't care if she's truly okay.
What a normal person would say to Alina: "Are you okay? Did he hurt you? I'm sorry you had to go through this."
What Mal said to Alina: "FUCK TORTURE! DID HE FUCK YOU BY ANY CHANCE?!?!"
He's so unserious FR
That's his only concern. If Alina likes or fucked the Darkling (sometimes I wish she had done the latter just so I could see Mal's face after it).
Also! He's an extraordinary bad influence for Alina and her confidence! 😍
A few minutes ago, Alina decided to return to the Little Palace to lead. To do the right thing and stand in this war.
And now we have Mal threaten her: "If you go, I might not follow!!"
And that shattered Alina's confidence. Now she feels ashamed ("maybe he doesn't want me", "maybe he'll leave me") and after that passage when Mal exits the tent, Alina starts thinking "What am I doing? I'm no soldier, or Saint. How will I make it?"
Mal is an influence that constantly wears her down emotionally by making her doubt herself, making her have guilts and making her thoughts come back to him constantly ('cause he's always "What about me?? Think of me!! Look at how shit I feel!!").
Again, he makes the whole matter revolve around him.
There is a civil war ongoing and Mal is like "Okay, but what about me, Alina??!!?!"
LIKE BRO NOBODY GIVES TWO SHITS ABOUT YOU!! THERE ARE PEOPLE DYING HERE!!
And another toxic trait of his. Apparently, if a woman says "no" to him, it's unacceptable:
(The first passage is when Mal tried to kiss her but Alina saw the Darkling behind his back and the second one is when Alina saw Mal kissing Zoya, btw)
He gets angry for the fact that Alina withdrew from his attempted kiss. And apparently he "knows what that means" because every girl he had ever kissed was willing to him.
I'm sorry, Mal, for the fact that a girl changed her mind at the last minute.
If a girl changes her mind, then you must respect that. Not shout at her. NO MEANS NO, MAL.
Mal is that type of guy that throws you in bed, you kiss him and all, and at the last minute when you change your mind and don't want to go for it (for whatever reason the girl might have of course) he gets angry and says "BUT YOU SAID "YES" TWO MINUTES AGO!!!"
He gives me the ick for real, guys.
And, of course, his fury for Alina's power and status. Because, since she gained them, she's no longer depended on him.
Yes, people. Mal wanted to take out a piece of her soul essentially, so he could have her! Romantic!! 🤩🤩
Also, the fact that he was constantly looking like shit in S&S because he was drunk every night is also selfish of him. Mal was Alina's personal guard and protector. One of her three closest ones. By doing this, by having this behaviour, he gives a VERY bad image to Alina.
Imagine what the nobles would think if they saw him this way. The power of image is everything. Nikolai knew it. The Darkling knew it. Even Alina came to know it. By having one of your protectors drinking heavily all night, get into fights and look like shit makes Alina feel embarrassed for the image she gives to the other people. And she was actually in a very delicate position at that time, because she had to gain the trust of the King, his counselors and nobles. Mal should know better than embarrassing her.
Imagine if you were in a high position for the first time in your life, trying to make an impression so everything could go alright and, in the meanwhile, your guardian walks around drunk.
This is not good. In today's world, they fire such people from their work.
And all these bullshit from him in R&R saying "I told stories of you from your childhood so they could see the real Alina" is also bullshit. Bitch, if you wanted to do something good, look respectable for the part. If you want to cry and drink kvas 24/7 then resign, lock yourself up and do it. Don't embarrass your boss.
Also, Bardugo had said that after S&S she received a lot of negative comments about Mal's character. So it's no wonder she made him suddenly all "good" in R&R. She wanted to give reasons to the readers to like him and support his eventual marriage with Alina.
Anyways, I know people will say that the Darkling was no better but, guys...
This is not a competition. Of who is better or worse.
And just like another person had once said in this fandom "The Darkling represents a fairytale character while Mal reminds you of every jerk you've met in your life"
And it's a perfect quote to describe them.
The Darkling is the type of guy we all fall in love in fiction. A fantastical character that does bad deeds but still you swoon over.
While Mal is that asshole you met in high school treating you like shit. That boy you were seeing in corridors flirting with every girl he saw and being a fuckboy. That relationship you had that undermined your value.
Mal is a character that hits very close at home for the readers (with his actions and personality).
This post about him and M*lina explains my thoughts perfectly.
Go read it when you can, guys. It's an incredible mini meta.
“There was darkness inside me. He had put it there, and I would no longer deny it. The volcra, the nichevo’ya, they were my monsters, all of them. And he was my monster, too.”
Just finished the Once Upon a Broken Heart series.
Every once in a while, I have the misfortune of fixating upon the "wrong" love interest when reading a series with a love triangle.
Sometimes it's not really "wrong" because a good love triangle should--theoretically--offer two enticing options to your lady lead. But oftentimes, the narrative drops hints about who the endgame is going to be. Sometimes those hints are present, but subtle.
In the case of OUaBH, it's a sledgehammer. Jacks is the actual love interest. Apollo is a plot device. There are lots of warning signs that, as a reader, you'd best NOT get attached to Apollo because he is ONLY a plot device.
I did not mind the sledgehammer red flags. I drove right past all of them. But I had my reasons.
First off, as I began reading, I quickly gathered this was a Bad Boy Love Story. Because Jacks is a Bad Boy. This caused me to dust off my "Bad Boy Romance" goggles. When you wear these goggles, you are braced to forgive all kinds of terrible things that a male lead might do for Joy of a Romantic Drama Roller Coaster.
He's gonna do terrible things for love. And to his love. Like lie to her. Or manipulate her. Or even turn her into a person who manipulates others. He might grab a random innocent to use as a sacrificial snack to a vampire to ensure her life is secured. He might murder a little more. (He'll tell himself it can't be helped. But it can.)He might even do something that violates his lady's very sanctity of self like… erase her history via tampering with the space/time continuum.
The point is, if I'm gonna be in the headspace where I let all that shit go, and give Jacks the benefit of being a Complicated Guy… I'm gonna extend that same courtesy to Apollo too.
And here's my problem: Apollo's tropes appeal to me MORE.
Yes, you're cured of the love spell. But there are side affects. The main side effect? You're still kind of in love with the target of your old love spell. But hey, at least you got your agency and personality back. Kind of. … It's not my first time seeing that trope, but it's JUICY.
When Evangeline kissed the love spell off of Apollo, and he flinched away from her, I was ready for several chapters worth of drama as Evangeline had to deal with being publicly (and maybe even magically still) tied to a man who's only thought was how to divorce her despite such a public wedding chock-full of royal obligations and stipulations. (Not to mention, he would need to schedule a VERY discreet tattoo cover-up job.)
My jaw dropped all the way to to the floor when he "died." Because WHY would an author pass up the opportunity to milk that drama? Then the Tiberius murder who-dunnit plotline happened, and I enjoyed it very much. Then the suspended animation bargaining chip plotline happened, and I enjoyed THAT very much.
So when this happened…
This was not the same prince she had married. That prince had a charmed existence. He'd been protected by guards, sought after by subjects, and more than a little in love with himself. When they'd first met, she would have described him as gallant, and picture-perfect. But now Apollo had a past: a love spell had upended his world, another curse had almost taken his life. He'd somehow fought against the second curse and triumphed, but from the look on his face, it still haunted him.
Apollo took a deep breath, looking torn as he said, "I don't know how much time I have, but I want you to know, I heard you. Every day that you came to my chamber--I heard your voice through the fog asking me to try."
-- The Ballad of Never After, Chapter 8. (pg 68-69)
Man. It hit. It just hit in a tingly way. Because this is a guy who's had a chance to reflect after some suffering. And I love that the guy who had no intention of choosing a bride at the Nocta Neverending decides that even though this woman has hurt him, he still cares and actually, he's a Wife Guy now. And yeah, I KNOW he goes all rotten in book 3, but it really feels to me like Stephanie Garber made him a better person before she decided to make him a worse person.
And I'm really into Better, Genuinely Gallant Apollo.
There's also a theme dear to my heart that the series only briefly plays with, but could have explored more: Love is both a a feeling and an action. I can't stop chewing over the fact that Eva took vows and marriage so seriously, that she hoped to open up her heart to Apollo and love him as an Action before she realized that she had Feelings of love for Jacks. EVEN THO her wedding to Apollo was the result of manipulation.
I dig that her holding his hand and talking to him when he was in stasis was an act of compassion bc she remembered how much any touch or whispered word helped her when she was turned to stone. It's the sort of thing that doesn't have to be inherently romantic, but makes for a compelling building block to a love story.
I know, story-wise, it wasn't gonna happen. The book constantly reinforces that she is Majorly Attracted to Jacks, and only finds the other handsome male characters lovely in an objective sort of way. But like Evangeline, I love to play with the story's endless possibilities in my head.
So here's the current "I can Fix Him" plot bunny particles in my head:
Apollo realizes he fucked up when he stole her memories, and tells her it's his fault from like, chapter 1. (Yes, I know stealing her memories is the rape analogy that kicks off his descent into Final Boss Villainy, but I'm just going for Better Person, not full on Great Guy yet. And Amnesia is so much fun as a trope, that I would never remove it from the gameboard lightly.)
Because he's more honest with her from the start, there is less Snow Ball of Lies with Evangeline. But he still lies to the kingdom to control the PR.
This makes for a Hunger Games-esque whiplash where Apollo holds her close in public, but gives her more space in private. And also tells her the truer, more traumatic version of an event in private.
This shakes off Evangeline's "Too Good to be True" vibe off of the situation. Because she gets to see Apollo's trauma and confessions
Since Apollo tells her upfront about Aurora, Eva is able to bring up the suggestion that maybe Aurora should not be trusted. Apollo considers it.
When the council pesters him about an heir, he calls Byron out for suggesting he put her aside or force himself on her to make her pregnant "Does anyone here have a suggestion actually befitting a married man, and not a BEAST?"
after a beat, Apollo tells them that he will be responsible and secure the line of succession by officially pardoning his brother and inviting him to come the fuck back home.
Because you CANNOT tell me--after Tiberius collapsed into a sobbing mess on that floor--that those brothers don't love each other.
Tiberius comes back.But he's also nervous as hell.
Apollo tells Ti that he forgives his bro for poisoning him. He may also EVENTUALLY forgive him for trying to poison Evangeline. Because he understands why he did it: he thought Eva had put him under a love spell.
Apollo decides there is ONE lie he's going to tell his lil' bro: He implies that he was already in love with Evangeline when he got put under the love spell. That the point of the love spell was to impair his judgement, so that he wouldn't question any suggestions Eva was manipulated into giving him.
Yes, Jacks remains the villain in Apollo's version of events for Quite a While. Bc the guy has reason to think of him that way. So Apollo still sees everything bad that Eva did to him as a manipulation from Jacks.
This is ALSO, however, how Eva eventually gets him to a more nuanced view of Jacks: "You saw some good in me, despite all I did to you. Is it so strange to think I may have found some good in him too?"
Tiberius becomes the practical voice on his shoulder, further countering the influence of Aurora
Tiberius also notices Apollo's new murder tendencies and pulls him back from the ledge.
some healer diagnoses Apollo with Post-Curse Murder Tendencies. (not bc this absolves him of shit, but bc I need it for my own reckoning of his personality changes. And the diagnosis puts Ti and Eva on lookout, so Apollo commits less murder. AKA the guards don't die, and the artist kid doesn't either.)
Because of Apollos Lil' white Lie about already being in love with Eva, Tiberius lets go of some of his suspicions of Eva, and even offers her a degree of support amidst her amnesia instead.
IDK exactly where this would go. This would riddle the plot of book 3 with holes, but ah well.
I realize I have become THAT fan, who's getting fixated on a rather OOC version of a character, but IDK I just needed to play in the sandbox a bit and get some of the thoughts out of my head.
AU where Alina let’s go of the dead weight and joins the Darkling. They’re hunting Mal—who had promised to “save” her when she made her choice—when they stumble upon him bleeding out, and Ivan standing beside him. It’s up to Alina to finish the job.
baratheonpilled
romaincrisis
amandla
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
