Lore Blog

I put my Dnd and writing stuff here.

[urie]

stop calling it a girl dinner and call it by its formal name: Fend For Yourself dinner in an ingredients household

[homunculus-argument]

The important part of making horrible kitchen concotions is to give them properly horrid names. I have discovered a new dish: The Blended Devil.

It's like deviled eggs, but instead of taking the yolks out of the eggs, you just mash the entire boiled eggs into mush with a fork and mix the rest of the ingredients in there. Eaten from a bowl, with a fork or a spoon depending on the consistency. Or go at it labrador style with your face down in the bowl if you're like that. Not up to me.

[thenotme]

That already has a name. It's called egg salad T-T

[homunculus-argument]

How is a concotion of eggs, mayo, mustard, and seasonings to taste a salad? It contains zero leafy green or vegetable.

[what-even-is-thiss]

A salad can just be a chopped mix of things. That’s egg salad alright. I put it on sandwiches. You can also put pickle relish and/or chopped onion in it.

[homunculus-argument]

If we go by the definition that any chopped mess of random bullshit counts as a salad, then I guess I'm a salad.

[what-even-is-thiss]

If that’s what you feel in your heart I won’t tell you that you’re wrong

[stillfuckingtired]

Uh-oh, coming down with a case of “what-if-a-bunch-of-other-people-experience-these-symptoms-as-bad-as-I-do-but-they-suck-it-up-and-work-anyway-and-I’m-just-being-a-little-bitch”-itis

[daveedmee]

explosion at health potion factory 0 dead 0 injured

[lleyksie]

brown bears ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ

[monstermonger]

He's worried about stepping on flowers. He loves nature. - (ref)

[titsay]

[littlecofiegirl]

I dreamed I met a new dnd group and someone already made Hail Mary's Rocky into a playable race.

[probablyfunrpgideas]

Eridians (Small Aberration [earth]) +2 Strength, -2 Dexterity Eridians cannot see, but they have Blindsight out to 60 feet as long as they can still hear. They get a +4 racial bonus to Listen checks. Perfect Memory: Eridians never forget. Choose one Knowledge skill at first level. Your character may always take 10 on this, even when under pressure. Sleep Cycle: Eridians are dazed for 3d4 minutes upon awakening from sleep, but they have a +2 racial bonus on saves against fatigue or exhaustion. Radial Symmetry: Eridians are not subject to flanking unless 3 or more enemies are involved. All five of their limbs are suitable for movement or manipulation. +1 Level Adjustment

Eridians speak their own tonal language, but adventurers among them often learn to understand some other languages. Their translator devices convey the proper register.

Thanks for the idea! It's been a while since I read the book, but hopefully this is a playable set of abilities for your little alien PCs. Let me know if you update it into other editions (shouldn't be too much work).

[teaboot]

The only downside to talking to small children like they’re normal people and treating them like normal people (as per my mom) is that as they develop into bigger children they are viscerally aware of every single moment in which they are pandered to like stupid little accessories (as per my dad, my teacher, the special ed aide, every adult in my middle school) and you end up getting a lot of phone calls from people reporting your kid for (checks notes) “undermining authority”, “disrupting the classroom environment”, “disobeying elder peers”, and “unionizing the grade eleven gym class with intent to incite a mutiny” (as per me) and you end up with a Grown Adult who will absolutely encourage and enable other people’s children to fuck the sustem

[teaboot]

Anyhow the most empowering shit you can say to a kid in my experience has to be

“Wow that adult was being a jerk”

“That sounds really frustrating”

”Good job handling that, I would have lost my mind”

“It’s cool, I don’t expect you to remember me”

“You don’t have to hug me if you don’t want to”

“Yeah sometimes (authority figure you can’t avoid) doesn’t know what they’re talking about, it’s not your fault, just do your best”

“I don’t totally understand what you mean but I get that you’re upset, is there anything I can do?”

”Wanna go yell and break stuff with me?”

“You don’t need to be friends with that kid as long as you can still be polite”

“If an adult tells you to do something that will get you hurt, you don’t have to listen.”

“My number one goal is to keep you safe, but I don’t know everything and sometimes I’m wrong, so let me know if I make a mistake.”

“Man. Today sucked.”

“Yeah I also kinda wanna cry right now”

“Whoops, yeah, my bad”

“I don’t know the answer to that but we can probably figure it out”

[targetedknowledge]

[euphorictruths]

[probablyfunrpgideas]

(Image ID: a person’s hand, clenched in a fist. They are wearing an item similar to bulky brass knuckles, but made out of a silvery metal and clear crystals.)

Thanks @fleshwizard for sharing this with me! Rather than making stats for it in D&D 5e, here’s an idea based on the aeon stones of Pathfinder and Starfinder:

Aeon stones are remnants of the old Azlanti Empire. Typically, mages with an interest in history will have these items floating around their heads, and they provide various benefits depending on the type of gem or stone used. However, the Aspis Consortium recently found a magical bowl that enhances the crystalline growth of aeon stones, and in their experiments this weapon was produced from a clear spindle stone.

A clear spindle provides life support, with more powerful versions that take care of the need to drink, eat, breathe or survive in space. As a weapon, the “crystal knuckles” deal 1d4 piercing damage, and when they hit there is a flash of white light. The target must make a Fortitude save (DC 14) or be levitated 5 feet, as the spell.

[probablyfunrpgideas]

Other aeon crystal knuckles:

Pale Ruby Trillion - Target becomes magically silenced, and can make a Will save (DC 13) to end the effect at the end of each turn.

Magenta Prism - Target takes 1 point of damage to its highest ability score.

Thorny Silver - The weapon launches its wielder into an unoccupied space on the other side of the target.

Lavender and Green Ellipsoid - The target must make a Will save (DC 17) or lose a spell/spell slot of level 2 or lower.

[dailycatsblog]

[probablygoodrpgideas]

Celestial warlock patron soul ransom program. The celestial makes deals with evil mortals to claim their souls after their death, and then trades those souls at a 2:1 rate with devils for all the good and neutral mortal souls *they* bought through faustian deals.

The celestial is essentially taking souls away from hell with their pacts and using them as a kind of prisoner exchange to free good and neutral people who ended up in hell. It's unorthodox, because it means giving power to evil people, but being able to legally rescue the innocent from hell is worth it in the celestial's eyes.

[catchymemes]

[parakeet]

if you go looking for doom and gloom all you will see is doom and gloom. if you go looking for reduced items at the grocery store you may find a littol treat

[probablybadrpgideas]

Wyverns, drakes and leviathans are the three life stages of the same dragon species. Wyverns are juveniles who eventually grow too heavy to fly and become terrestrial drakes, which then continue growing until they are too heavy to support their weight on land and become fully aquatic leviathans. When the time comes for them to breed, they lay eggs close to shore that wash up on the beach and hatch into tiny wyverns, starting the cycle over.

*realm of the elderlings intensifies*

[only-cat-memes]