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please reblog this if it is okay to anonymously confess something to you.

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a ver…

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‘The Sun and the Moon’ David Shannon

profeminist

Cartoon by https://www.instagram.com/vulgadrawings

AGGRIEVED ENTITLEMENT

looks like this:

[The single panel comic has a pink background. A white man with short brown hair wearing a white collared shirt and black pants is sitting on one end of a wide wooden bench. His arms are crossed and he is staring straight ahead, his legs splayed out to either side wider than his hips. To his right stands a woman with dark hair and brown skin wearing a green vest over a lilac long-sleeved shirt and black shirt. She is gesturing with one hand at the bench, smiling as she looks sideways at it.]

Woman: I THINK I DESERVE TO SIT ON THIS BENCH TOO!

[Below the first drawing, the woman is now sitting on the opposite end of the bench, her hands on her closed knees. She is looking sideways apprehensively at the man who has fallen onto the ground. His arms are flung out and he looks horrified.]

White man: OH MY GOD I'VE BEEN PUSHED OFF! THERE'S NO ROOM FOR ME ON [Underlined text.] MY [End underlined text.] BENCH ANYMORE!

See also: human conversation.

"Men perceived the discussion as being equal when women talked only 15% of the time, and the discussion as being dominated by women if they talked only 30% of the time."

anxious-bisexual-0

UPON CLOSER INSPECTION

IT IS HIS MIDDLE AND RING FINGER HE DOESN’T USE

Kinda blurry but

HE USES HIS THUMB TO PULL THE DRESS UP AND POINTER FINGER TO MOVE THE HAIR

COLIN DID IN FACT SPIDER-MAN HER

THE RING. THE RIIIIIIIIIING.

( @dollypopup you inspired me to investigate…)

dollypopup

WAIT WAIT WAIT!!!

But I am also almost CERTAIN that he was going in with his thumb on her clit so maybe he's only half a gentleman ahahaha okay but seriously, wouldn't his ring be more askew if he was going Spiderman instead of Bunny Ears? Plus, he wouldn't be able to be in as deep, and from her reactions, he was going for gold.

I argue that his pinky was doing most of the work in pulling that dress up and he mostly just hooked his thumb on the underside (which makes sense because dresses were very hard to launder back in the day, we love a considerate king) and then he was okay with brushing her hair back with his index finger because she can more easily wash it.

I maintain that Colin Bridgerton went cum hither knuckles deep in Penelope with his first two fingers!!!!

anxious-bisexual-0

While I do agree that his thumb was definitely going at it, I have come to another conclusion. HE ONLY USED HIS MIDDLE FINGER.

Remember, Penelope is a virgin. Like extra virgin.

lol olive joke

After further consideration, would he really have been able to get two in the pink if this was her absolute first time?

If his middle finger goes in, like IIIIIIN, and he uses the heel of his palm on her clit and sometimes his thumb, woo boy that’s impressive

I’m just glad we agree that the middle finger was certainly “going for gold,” as you so eloquently stated.

dollypopup

My friend, you are so big brained. My immediate first thought is that I completely agree with you!!! Colin is too much of a considerate man to go spelunking in her secret passageway with two fingers, however, upon rewatching the scene, there are definitely two '*OH!*' moments from her, indicating that I believe he STARTED with his middle finger and then got assistance from another!

I argue the wingman was his index finger

Evidence 1:

Enough said

Evidence 2:

His index and middle finger are much closer in size and length than his index and ring finger. In proper cave diving, it is important for equipment to be consistent! His ring also maintains the same orientation pre-fingering as post-fingering, and with how heavy they were going at it

that thang would have been on backwards by the time he was done

However, you are so right-- he was using the heel of his palm to rub her off whilst he was (heavy) petting her from the inside out!!! Which is why he feels alright to adjust her dress with his thumb. He literally had her in the palm of his hand.

The two in the pink are his index and middle. Penelope is a woman who wants it all and he's giving it to her!

anxious-bisexual-0

My esteemed colleague, you have convinced me.

I believe this is when digit 2 went in. Cause he’s also absolutely entranced. Besotted. Going crazy at the fact that he is KNUCKLES DEEP in his best friend and he loves it.

While I think ol’ ringy DEFINITELY saw some action, middle finger did the most and pointer was the assist.

Luke Newton the man that you are, you fantastic actor you.

@dollypopup I truly appreciate this conversation, I applaud your debating skills, well done.

dollypopup

My soldier in arms, this has been a phenomenal conversation, and I believe you have fully clocked the exact moment digit 2 went in alongside his middle finger. Not only is she reacting to that double dip, but he'd definitely going 'here kitty kitty' about it and he's *reveling* in making her feel good. He certainly did oil his way right in. Luke Newton, the man you are.

Bravo.

It has been an honor discussing this with you and coming (ha) to a conclusion.