Fluff Poisoned

26 | she/they | I write sometimes, find me on ao3 @stingerpicnic

[allegedly-human]

nothing is more tumblr than having a tumblr sexyman wiki and then warn you to not find some of those men sexy because it's problematic

[mari-monsta]

why is it that when im reading fanfic i feel like i have a fairly good metric for if something is characterized accurately but when im trying to write suddenly its like ive never seen this character in my life. would he say that. would he fucking say that. suddenly i have no idea

[pisshandkerchief]

being obsessed with a character is so fucking embarrassing like I'll be getting dressed in the morning like "I bet the 12th doctor would wear these socks" bitch shut the fuck up

[pisshandkerchief]

some of you MUST be making up guys.

[pisshandkerchief]

[willgrahamscock]

they want you to care more about 'job' than yaoi... don't fall for this scam

[arataka-reigen]

they want you to care more about 'job' than yuri... don't fall for this scam

[bluemuffin-draws]

Endurance runners

Part 2 of this

[buttered-toasty]

Another silly ass low effort phm comic bc I keep thinking of this post and just cracking up at the mirror pronouns also being another level of codependency. Rocky and his bestie.

[hppjmxrgosg]

"going out to get milk" is a common turn of phrase used to describe a man abandoning his family.

the "milkman" is a common figure in stories depicting a woman's infidelity and adulterous affair.

this implies that the ability to provide milk would both decrease the likelihood of a man abandoning his wife and children, as it would eliminate the need for leaving to get milk AND would secure that man's marriage, as his wife would have no need to seek milk from an extraneous source.

therefore, all men should produce milk, through various means such as:

- being a cow

- being an almond

- being a woman

- being a coconut

- being in the omegaverse

- being an oat

(list is exemplary and not finite)

in this essay, i will redefine the nuclear family and explain the seductive and inflammatory nature of the 1993 "Got Milk?" commercials.

[hppjmxrgosg]

you shut your mouth.

[to-proudly-go]

They haven't talked about this particular idiom yet

[kipzkitsch]

when you're feeling insecure about your limb difference, but your cool alien teacher has the same one, so it's actually awesome

[nondelphic]

writing is just sitting in front of a computer and making up problems for imaginary people while ignoring your own. fun and casual hobby.

[kit-screams-into-the-void]

statement statement

some extras i cut out from the comic + silly unrelated doodle based on what my friend said when i was drawing this comic on call:

[cute-catts]

[panickingavocado]

[im-a-goat-in-disguise]

Did you know? Tumblr DOES have a post length limit. Strangely, though, it's based on how many blocks of text you have. Supposedly this implies that you can have any length post so long as it's one block of text? Very strange, will have to investigate further.

[im-a-goat-in-disguise]

Two limits! You can have a maximum of 4,096,000 characters in 1 [one] tumblr post. I would work out how many combinations this is, but 26^6,000 is already considered to be "Infinity" by most calculators, and a program I wrote threw an error code.

26^95,000 is already over 134,000 characters long - which would take 33 different text blocks to convey via tumblr. Whenever somebody says we're running out of posts, don't forget that tumblr is needlessly designed for MASSIVE amounts of information [no matter how detrimental it may be for mobile phones].

There are SOME works of fanfiction which are lengthy enough that you couldn't fit the whole thing into one tumblr post, but this is enough to fit Hitchikers Guide To The Galaxy in it about 14 times over.

[im-a-goat-in-disguise]

Don't hide that in the tags

[thewolfofthestars]

The Lord of the Rings is generally my go-to measuring stick for "long-ass pieces of text", so I must additionally point out that, if written out optimally, about 2 full Lord of the Ringses would fit into one Tumblr post, apparently.

Though I'm not certain if that character count includes spaces, unfortunately, as I got that figure by googling "how many letters are in lord of the rings" and came upon a TikTok that counted the number of letter characters in LotR in order to figure out how many Spaghettios cans would be needed to re-write the entire thing, if one were to cut and paste each individual letter from the cans blackmail-letter style.

For those curious, the numbers are 2,261,081 letters in LotR, which calculates out to 8,795 cans of Spaghettios needed, which would cost about $12,225.

What a way to start my day. The internet truly is a beautiful place.

[jv]

Hey! Guy who programmed most of the core pieces of the editor here!

So, those are the theoretical limits, yeah. But in practice, the editor is not even close to be optimized to handle these kinds of huge posts: there is a point, far far away from the size of the lord of the rings, that your browser would just crash.

So if you are planning to post long fanfiction, or anything, you better work on something that's optimized for long form (locally, or some alternative to Google docs) and then post in chunks.

So no, Tumblr is not designed to support these massive posts. It's theoretically possible, but that never was a real scenario we were trying to support

[sztupy]

Editor crashes? No problem, I'm sure you can do that through the API though

[jv]

I'm honestly very curious of what it would happen if someone tries something like using the API to post the entire Lord Of The Rings. I would assume the request would timeout, but it would be a cool test to run. Anyway, if it works, anyone trying to reblog that post would just insta-kill their browser :D

[sztupy]

IT WORKED!

Post by @full-lotr-test

💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 0 · J. R. R. Tolkien — The Lord Of The Rings. (1/4) ----------------------------------------------- THE LORD OF THE RINGS by J.

(okay this is just the first book, let me see if I can do all three)

[jv]

oh yeah, almost a million characters, 365 text blocks, and the editor is handling it pretty well

Honestly, it works way better than I expected! I guess being plain text and not having to render any fancy formatting is enough for a modern browser to handle it well. Reblogging it took a few more seconds than usual, but went through too. Good job tumblr!

[sztupy]

Here's the entire one, all 3 books + appendices:

Post by @full-lotr-test

💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 0 · J. R. R. Tolkien — The Lord Of The Rings. (1/4) ----------------------------------------------- THE LORD OF THE RINGS by J.

The API did return a 500 when trying to upload BUT it actually did upload

[willcodehtmlforfood]

.

[yapping-migrant]

opening @full-lotr-test makes the app crash, I need to check on PC 👀

[jv]

I just tested on my Android phone and it froze the app for about 30 seconds, but when I thought it was going to finally crash, it actually loaded the blog and started working normally

[jv]

Btw, @sztupy, have you tried to edit the post? Does it work??

[sztupy]

Yes, someone asked me to add a tag so they can filter it out, and I tried that over from the web interface.

For the first post (first book only) there was no issue. Edit loaded, I could add the tag, press Save and done. Note: this was on a PC using Chrome

For the second post (all three books) it worked the same way as the API. I could load up the page and edit it, but when pressing save I'd get an error message. However the edit did go through actually and the tag is now there.

Haven't tried to edit the text itself, but don't think it would make a difference - if your browser can load it'd just work.

(On mobile on a low/mid-range Android the App could open up the post without problems, but haven't tried editing. Using a mobile browser - Firefox in my case - the page could load but it was super slow, and buggy, and it also did crash once)

Also as a public service announcement: if you want to filter the post out from your dash the tag is #full-lotr-test

Also if anyone is interested I loaded up the entire LOTR trilogy in TXT file, then wrote a code that split it out into NPF (Neue Post Format, you know the new PDF or whatever) blocks of at most 4000 characters, then simply called the Create Post API with the resulting NPF block. I believe there's around 900 blocks in the second post above, each block containing somewhere between 3000-4000 characters, so close to the theoretical limit

[jv]

That's interesting, opening it in the editor means that you don't only have the rendered html version, but also the JSON object containing all the blocks. I would expect it to at least stutter a little.

I tested it again from the android app, and scrolling through the post is really painful: it freezes the app for a few seconds every time you scroll an entire screen... So yeah, I think it would take hours to scroll through the entire thing . So anyone reblogging it is probably earning an unfollow from their beloved mutuals if they want to be able to use Tumblr at all that day 😁

[headspace-hotel]

Spell of "makes all your followers unfollow you"

surprisingly functional web site

[jv]

Actually, it's the polar opposite. We are throwing crazy shit at Tumblr here, and it's taking it as a champ. I can't understand how people are seeing this post and going "ooh, crappy Tumblr am I right?", when we haven't manage to break anything even while trying to go up to the theoretical limits.

Let me tell you: Tumblr codebase was the most tidy and well kept I've had worked with. While I was there, the front end had a 100% test coverage rule, which is bananas. And the backend is a marvel of optimization that works so well that's scary.

Does Tumblr have hiccups from time to time? Of course. Are there parts of the code that are so optimized the only a few folks actually understand what's going on there? Yup.

But that's web development in a nutshell. I know this is hard to believe if you don't work in the industry, but the internet is built by gluing together some tubes using chewing gum. Every site, every platform, once it reaches a certain threshold of complexity, includes a good bunch of hacks and a handful of corners where no one dares to change anything because no one entirely understands exactly what's going on there. Tumblr is not an exception, but if anything, it's remarkably well kept and works pretty flawlessly. As proven by the fact you can throw the entire Lords of the Ring trilogy at it and it swallows it as if it was nothing. All while having less engineers than what it would take to fill a minibus.

[mollybeenoel]

[felixfeliccis]

Preach I guess

[felixfeliccis]

OH I HAVE MISUNDERSTOOD

[fatsexybitch]

[nick-nonya]

[yr-tiktok-mom]

[syrnyj]

[summer-fruits-and-cream]