stormxblooded ( tris )
He doesn’t remember a time where he has felt so light, as though the burden he carries is finally shared with another. It should be a relief, but it brings with it its own concerns. There will come a day - perhaps soon, perhaps in the weeks to come - where he will have to let her go, let her replicate this charade they have created on more honest terms, and the most he shares with her, the harder it will hit when that day comes. He cannot share that burden with her, though. Not now, and not ever.
But when she laughs, it is easy to forget, easy to allow a chuckle to rumble from his own throat. “Oh, good,” he makes no attempt to hide the amusement in his voice. “Then there is no need for pretence. It couldn’t have happened to more deserving victims.” There’s something underneath his humour, a darker and more twisted feeling, an anger that he cannot name and cannot place. She has had her share of ill treatment, and that this should continue despite her liberation from Lord Royce is maddening.
“I did,” he confirms, calmly, no sense of shame or apologies in the words. Neither do the glares of others deter him. In the world of Tristan Vance, there’s little that matters outside of the two of them. “I am quaking in my boots, I am sure,” the glint in his eyes show that he is doing nothing of the sort, and he nudges her again. Gentle teasing, anything to keep that smile on her face.
Her question, however, pushes his mirth to one side, replaced by a thoughtful furrow of his brow as he considers that which she proposes. It is only then that he realises the one truth he has been repressing for far too long now - that despite his claims, he does care what she thinks. He cares very much indeed. “It’s different,” he responds after a beat. His eyes meet hers, and a heartbeat passes. Then another, and his tongue darts out to wet his lips, suddenly dry. “I do not want you to think ill of me,” he admits. “But I fear you may come to. At least you cannot say that I did not warn you myself.”
IT STRIKES HER IN AN INSTANT. A REVELATION . just as quickly as this easy companionship has come about , the laughter and the comfort that comes with it - - it can just as easily disappear . her father can figure out a one - sided ruse , or lord vance ( despite his brooding and protestations ) can , in fact find the one whose heart beats in tandem with his own . complicated and messy as he makes it seem . he is not hers , but she will lose him . eventually , she will lose him . she has suffered a great many heartbreaks , but none quite like this . none where the idea of the loss pains her .
she does not want to lose him , but feels that telling him such is foolish . it puts an unfair pressure on his shoulders . it is already his favor -- his sacrifice that he makes for his sake . why should he exert his kindness any further . not when he deserves love , especially , perhaps , because he thinks himself the most undeserving of it.
he teases her again , and she sees the light in his eyes & the smile on his lips , and thinks it perhaps it the most rare & beautiful thing she has ever seen . it falters upon her next inquiry , as she expected it might have , but she DOESN’T . she remains steadfast , resolute . she stands as tall as her stature will allow her . and , perhaps boldly , she takes one of his hands into both of her own , resting it just below her chin .
❛ do you know something , tristan vance ? ❜ she presses her cheek to his hand . the line is blurry - - between close friends , to false beloveds, to...something else entirely . ❛ you have secured my good opinion for years . ever since you first came to runestone . all it took was for you to look at me once and say what no one else would . that i was sad , that i was frightened , that i was alone. ❜ she does not mean to cry , but a single tear slips down her cheek and lands on her glove . ❛ you saw me for exactly what i was and expected nothing else , and still thought to make a friend of me . it takes a remarkable person to see someone so clearly , particularly when all i needed was for someone to see me . ❜ if there is yet to be propriety between them , she will blame it later on her status as a ruined woman . ❛ you saw me . you see me . without pretense or expectation . and that is a gift . ❜ it is why every letter he has ever written her is tucked carefully into a box, more precious to her than the gowns her father buys to try to restore her eligibility. cautiously , she presses her lips to his knuckles. ❛ and i think , that perhaps , i see you, too . so whatever ill may be said about you will have to fight me before it is granted audience. ❜











