Strange New Quotes

Incorrect quotes for Strange New Worlds and The Original Series.

[strange-new-quotes]

Jim: *sucking on a popsicle* Sam: Pfft, you practicing for when Spock gets here? Jim: *takes a huge ass bite out of the popsicle* Sam: *Concern*

[strange-new-quotes]

Jim: Hey Sam, can you give me the opposite of these words? Jim: Always, Coming, From, Take, Me, Down. Sam: Never, Going, To, Give, You- Sam: The fucking satisfaction.

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Jim: You didn’t cry when bambi’s mother died?! Spock, sarcastically: Yes, it was very sad when the guy stopped drawing the deer.

[alligator-gothic]

The Trouble with Trabubus

[suekay]

Kate Mulgrew and Melissa Navia have both shared this meme now, and that really puts a smile on my face 😁

[strange-new-quotes]

Jim: If I say I love you, will you say it back? Spock: Yes. Jim: I love you. Spock: It back. *Later* Sam: Why is Jim crying face-down on the floor?

[strange-new-quotes]

Sam: look Spock, I'm not slut shaming you but... Sam: Actually yeah, I'm TOTALLY slut shaming you.

[strange-new-quotes]

Spock: Just one minute. I need to go and take out the trash. Kirk: Oh. We're going out? Spock: Wh...

[strange-new-quotes]

Sam: If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're impressed. Spock: But you do know better.

[strange-new-quotes]

Spock: Lieutenant Kirk, I mustache you a question Sam:

[nymphoutofwater]

fuuuuck that is my circus. are those…? yep… those are my monkeys….. goddammit.

[managerie76]

[suekay]

Captains and Away Missions

TOS

Jim: I’m going to lead the landing party

Spock: Of course, captain

Bones: What are you stupid? It could be dangerous!

Jim: Bones…Did you see the way the magistrate’s daughter looked at me?

Bones: Okay, fine. Go.

Bones: …Maybe I’ll beam down too.

TNG

Picard: Maybe I’ll just-

Riker: No

Picard: But I didn’t-

Riker: No… It’s my sworn duty as your First Officer to mollycoddle you at all times and I take that duty very seriously indeed

Picard: But… but I just wanted to do some archaeology and stuff

Riker, grumbling: Fine. Riker to Worf. Meet the away team in Transporter Room 3. You’re on babysitting duty.

DS9

Sisko: I think I’m going to go a camping trip on an unexplored planet in the Gamma Quadrant with my teenaged son

Kira: Sounds like a good idea sir, have fun!

VOY

Janeway: You, you and you…yeah you. Go down to that planet and do science stuff.

Chakotay: Captain…You’re a scientist and you’ve not been off the ship in a while. You might enjoy joining the away team and getting some fresh air.

Janeway: Nah… I’m going to the holodeck to do fun shit then I’m going to go and wind up Seven

Chakotay: ...Understood Captain

Tuvok: *dislocates his neck trying not to roll his eyes and sigh out loud*

ENT

Archer: That looks like a mighty fine planet

Trip: Yeah Captain it sure does!

Archer: Think we should go down there?

Trip: Sounds like fun sir!

T’Pol: We’d be best letting the survey team finish their work. There could be toxins or dangerous animals or-

Archer: Well that sounds a little boring. I’m gonna go get Porthos. Who wants to bet he’ll puke up alien grass all over my bed again tonight!

[suekay]

SNW

Pike: Okay kids, who wants to go on a field trip? And I'll make pack lunches for everyone!

Everyone: Me, me! Pick me sir!

Pike: We'll all go, and let's make it fancy dress!

Pike: except you Ortegas, you fly the ship.

Ortegas: But, but... I already have this really cute hat!

[suekay]

Describing the Star Trek shows (disclaimer - I love Star Trek, don't come at me)

Enterprise - A group of idiots with no business being in space go into space while being babysat by a Vulcan who has Had. Enough.

Discovery- A group of idiots get high on shrooms then go time travelling

Short Treks- An Idiot Anthology

Strange New Worlds - A very handsome idiot takes a group of younger idiots on an interstellar roadtrip, while teaching them to cook. Singing is involved.

TOS - A vulcan and a doctor accompany a man known as a galactic fuckboy around the galaxy. Galactic fuckboy isn't really a fuckboy but more of a philosopher who's totally in love with the vulcan.

TAS - Galactic not-a-fuckboy and friends in 2D.

TNG - A group of educated idiots accompany a gentleman scholar around the galaxy. He's more of a fuckboy than the last captain but we keep forgetting this because his first officer is That Slut.

DS9 - A group of fucked-up idiots move to a space station with their space dad and add trauma and war crimes to their pre-existing traumas. And the universe hates on an Irish guy.

Voyager - A group of clueless idiots get lost while looking for angry idiots who got lost first. They then adopt a hitchhiker who seems intent on poisoning them.

Lower Decks - An idiot captain refuses to acknowledge that her ship is full of idiots, but she sure does treat them like they are

Prodigy - A group of kids want to boldly go and join Starfleet. Unfortunately they're borderline competent, jeopardising their chances.

Picard - An elderly idiot finds out retirement sucks and takes a group of unwitting victims along on merry adventures that will mentally and physically scar them all for life.

[strange-new-quotes]

Jim: Look, I know you think my judgement's clouded because I like Spock a little bit. Bones, holding Jim's notepad: You doodled your wedding invitation. Jim: No, that's our joint tombstone. Bones: My mistake.

[strange-new-quotes]

Spock: It is cold outside.. would you like to hold hands? We should stay close. Jim, blushing: Okay. Sam: It's fucking summer.

[strange-new-quotes]

Jim to Bones: Turn that frown upside-down! *a little while later* Jim: What are you doing? Bones, trying to do a handstand: You told me to “turn that frown upside-down” but it’s not working .

[strange-new-quotes]

Jim: I just want someone to take me out. Spock: On a date? Bones: With a sniper gun? Sam: Both if you're not a coward.