Itās easy to forget that consent isnāt just breached by assholes. Normal, nice people do it too. Whether out of ignorance or selfish interest, people who consider themselves āgoodā sidestep consent all the time.
It actually drives me wild. Iāve been sexually active for 4 years now, so new to the game, but Iāve had a very fair share of sexual partners. I have never had sex with a condom. Not a single fucking time.
This isnāt because I havenāt asked directly. I maintain the expectation in my dating profile bios, in chats before I meet people, in boundary discussions before sex, HELL Iāve asked during sex. Every single time thereās a sidestep.
āI wonāt be able to stay hard with a condomā āyou wouldnāt actually like condomsā āthey make me uncomfortableā āIāll pull outā āIām not gonna cum in youā OR THEY JUST FUCKING IGNORE ME
Some of these people were assholes. Some of them were rude and showed their colors in other ways. Most. Of. Them. Were. Nice. People.
Nice people hurt people all the time.
I really need to learn how to stand up for myself more in bed
