PTSD diaries

I am a literature student living in France trying to navigate college life and PTSD. I hope this blog will remind my fellow survivors that they're not alone. No sensitive topics will be discussed without a trigger warning beforehand.

[studentlifewithptsd]

Early weekend.

Thursday, November 10th.

Train drivers in my city are going on a general strike today, and as a commuter living one hour away from college campus, this means I can't go to class today. Tomorrow is also a national holiday in my country, which means no class either.. So I get to stay home until monday. Yay giant weekend :)

I still have quite a lot of work to do, though. But I was feeling a bit anxious this morning so even though I woke up at 6 am, I didn't feel like diving straight into studying.. So instead I got up, grabbed a cup of herbal tea and a novel, only to go straight back under the covers and spend two hours reading lol.

I have three midterms coming up next week, which is the worst possible timing because I am currently on new medication and my body and mind are not doing well ; my doctors told me I should expect for it to continue until at least next week.. so, not-yay :(

I finally got up at 8 am, and decided to go grocery shopping. I bought a lot of healthy food in preparation for next week, because it is going to be hard and I want to go easy on my body.

The shopping itself was exhausting so I took a nap after coming back home.

Lunch was delicious rice with curcuma, tomato sauce and bell peppers that my SO prepped for me yesterday, which I am immensely grateful for ♥

After eating, I got to work, aka studying for my upcoming midterms.. There was a notion in one chapter I could not understand at all, so I emailed my professor about it. I am bit nervous now, I hope she will not find my question stupid.. but it is better than not understanding the material at all, right ?

My boyfriend is usually in charge of making dinner, but he was exhausted when he came home this evening, so I took care of it. I made us some ramen with eggs and homemade chicken broth.

The rest of the evening was the same as usual, bath, body care and fun readings.

Peace & love and may the end of your week be peaceful ♥

[studentlifewithptsd]

Night routine ♦ Self care for a student with mental illness

Since most of my panic attacks happen at night, building and maintaining a strong night routine is one of the most important aspects of my healing journey.

My routine starts two hours before my set bedtime, which is 10 pm. I have to wake up everyday at 5 am, so in theory that gives me seven hours of sleep.

I make a point to make some time, everyday, to do something distracting and relaxing that will help me unwind a little and get in the mood for sleeping. My go-to activity is reading, and to make sure what I'm reading does not contain triggering or anxiety-inducing content, I usually pick children's books, or books that I have already read ♥ This is only a personal preference though, this tip works with whatever activity is safe and distracting for you.

I read until 9 pm, and then hop into the shower. To me, showering is sensory heaven. The hot water on my skin and face soothes my muscles and feels like a long warm hug. I am the type of person who craves physical affection and dreads it at the same time.. Anyways.. The scent of soap and shampoo are relaxing, as well. My favorite scents are rose, apple and mint :) This moment is a huge help on making me feel physically soothed, it's like my reward for managing to make it through the day hehe.

After showering, I apply some perfume on my wrists. Even when I am not going anywhere, I love putting on perfume, as a little treat for my nose~ The one I currently use was gifted to me almost a year ago, and despite using it everyday I still haven't run out of it.. It is rose scented too of course.

After body care comes teeth care, which is a bit more complicated because my gums and teeth are very sensitive and tend to hurt easily while being brushed. I have to use a pharmacy-bought toothpaste in order of it to be painless. If you have some sensory issues when it comes to brushing your teeth, I do recommend sharing your concerns with a pharmacist, it was a life changer for me ♥

Before going to bed, I pack my bag for the morning. If I wait until the morning to do it, I know I will be too groggy to do it properly and end up forgetting a few things, so I make sure to do it before sleeping. My essentials are usually a notebook and a pen, some highlighters, lunch money, and whatever textbook is required for class.

And my routine ends here. If I have some energy left, I will continue my reading, if I am too tired, I will go straight under the blankets.