- and Louis stumbles into him, water going everywhere, and he buries his face in Niall’s neck and his breath is ragged and he says, what the fuck am i going to do with me when this goes wrong, and Niall thinks, I love– and he holds on, he holds on even though he doesn’t know if he’s holding Louis up or if Louis’s holding him up, because this wasn’t ever supposed to happen, this was supposed to be lads having a drink at festival and being mates after, this wasn’t supposed to be the sun and the moon and the fucking stars and the whole world expanding just to fit Louis alongside him, this wasn’t supposed to be him having to rediscover everything he’d thought he’d known about himself all this time– and Louis shudders in his arms and Niall thinks, I can’t, I can’t anymore, I’ll fucking explode with it, so he pushes Louis away and Louis’s face is caught in a weird half expression of bewilderment and fear, and Niall grabs him again, grabs him so that he’s pulling him in, one hand to his neck, another to his cheek, and then his mouth is on Louis’s and Louis’s kissing him and his heart’s going to rocket out of his chest as he kisses him back, as the world changes and he says, I’ve never– but Louis’s shaking his head, me neither, not ever, but his eyes are bright and he’s trembling, and smiling, and Niall says, not for the first time, I love– but this time he ends it with you.