"im sorry i yelled at you" + Joel Miller pls baby🫶congrats btw!
content warnings: fem!reader, argument prior to the scene, apologies, joel is soft on r
you don’t know when the tears started. not definitively, anyway. you remember what started as a disagreement escalating beyond either of your control; you remember a scrambling attempt to reel your feelings in, a tugging in your chest telling you that this is going too far. joel was yelling in a way he doesn’t very often, loud and sharp, cutting through your quieter voice like a knife.
he knows he’s fucked up the second you turn away. you stifle a hiccuping sob with the back of your hand, eyes squeezed shut and back rounding like an armadillo as you scold yourself for being so sensitive. you wouldn’t be under different circumstances, but it’s been a hard week and you’re tired.
you think maybe he’d be better off without you. you almost say it.
joel’s voice is suddenly closer; his hand scrubs a huge circle across the expanse of your back and your heart ticks, loud and booming in your own ears.
“i’m sorry i yelled at you.”
“it’s okay. i deserved it,” you say— quiet, voice congested where another bout of tears is stuck in your throat.
you shrug and swipe a cruel palm across your stuffy nose. you’re moving against your better judgement, shoulders tilting until you’re facing joel again. he looks sorry in a sort of frustrated way, brows pinched above his deep set eyes, lips pursed, partially obscured by his scruff, peppered with grey.
“i didn’t mean for it to go as far as it did,” you mumble, lip trembling.
his hand cups the back of your neck and you let him draw you up until your noses are almost touching. his thumb rubs your cheek, just beneath your ear.
“i never meant to yell. i never want to raise my voice at you.” sweetheart, he wants to say; he thinks the pet name is maybe too much. “i’ll never do it again.”
you close your eyes and sag against his firm hold on your top half.
“come here,” he murmurs. you do as he says without thinking, though you’re not sure you can get much closer. his palm is cool against your hot cheeks. “get some rest, okay?”
you sigh and push yourself up towards your sleeping bag, a ways away from ellie’s sleeping figure. to your delight, joel follows.
“you comin’ with me?” you ask. you try not to sound too excited.
he rolls his eyes but settles next to you on the woodland floor anyway. branches crunch beneath your body as you try to get comfortable. once you’re manoeuvred into joel’s lap, your head against his thigh, you’re already half asleep.
you’re not sure why he’s so soft on you, but you’re not going to protest.
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