galaxy brainrot @thejgatsbykid - Tumblr Blog

importantcatpics

deoxoid

his wife has filled THEIR house with ANTIQUES. to AVOID DAMAGING HER VALUABLES i fuck him on the floor

lesvegas

passing in public makes me feel like white shrek

lesvegas

literally how it feels

welpnotagain

angelofthemornings-deactivated2

One thing I really like about Beverly Engel's book It Wasn't Your Fault, which is about PTSD-induced toxic shame, is that quite a bit of it deals with people who haven't broken The Cycle of Abuse (TM) and have gone on to hurt others. That's a really underserved and vulnerable patient population, and statistically, it's also MASSIVE. I don't think I've read a single other self-help type book on PTSD and self-loathing that confronts the possibility that you're exactly as bad as you think you are.

angelofthemornings-deactivated2

I felt better that it so much as mentioned that children can react to abuse with ungovernable rage. Everybody likes the image of PTSD patients as internalizing everything and becoming doormats, which does happen, and often, but it's not the only narrative. Personally I've always hated my abusers and have always wanted everyone who so much as breathed wrong in my direction from ages 0 to 18 to burn eternally in hell. I *never* thought any of it was my fault and ever since I was a toddler I was willing to make it everybody else's problem, and it's really relieving to read a clinical perspective that acknowledges that abuse victims can act that way too.

reasonablywittyatbest

It's wild to me that its such a neglected subset of abuse victims. Its really common. When I still lived with my parents and was still subjected to my father every fucking day I would lash out terribly at my mother, to the point when i went to visit them for years afterwards she was afraid I would lash out again. We've worked it out, I'm a much better person when I'm not regularly subjected to mental and emotional abuse, but like, its just so common.

I think it must be, at least partially, because, people hate the imperfect victim. Its easy for so many people to sympathize with someone who never lashed out. Less so for people to sympathize with people who are angry and lash out. Even though its a perfectly sensible reaction to being hurt over and over. I'm sure most people would like to think they would simply never.

I don't think this is the whole reason, but, I think it plays into it.

sunspotpony

Similarly, there’s a narrative of, you cannot experience grief over having fucked up. That if you are hurting because you caused harm, because you were the cause of harm, that you’re not allowed to grieve, because you “earned your sorrow. You deserve to bottle it up and to hurt for the bad things you have done,”

Which is punitive logic. It’s copthink. Which is bad.

angelofthemornings-deactivated2

important

In fact, you can actually give yourself trauma over fucking up too badly and doing, witnessing, or failing to prevent something evil that goes against your morals; for instance, if you steal your mother's life savings due to drug addiction, kill a civilian during a military operation (please do not join the military), or became abusive because you didn't have the tools and skills yet to handle BPD. In the field of psychology this is called "moral injury" or "perpetrator trauma."

noknowshame

resurrected dead wife watching her own montage: wow I looked so hot in that

justletmescrolll

what it’s like to own a black cat

sometiktoksarevalid

bigassbowlingballhead

you can make most fandom drama disappear with this one cool trick

bigassbowlingballhead

GET THE FUCK OFF TWITTER

crabussy

people online are on a mission to hold every single random person "accountable" in the same way as a thief in the middle ages who is about to be beheaded in the town square for stealing a tomato

crabussy

sometimes, if someone makes a cruddy mistake that hurt some feelings, you don't have to make a 10 page callout doc detailing every time they were sort of a dick to you. sometimes it's okay to just block someone and talk about the situation to a close friend instead of doing this whole "hear ye hear ye" thing

crabussy

you know the whole "this meeting could have been an email" thing? this callout doc could have been a difficult but rewarding private conversation