okay i'm in the middle of getting cleaned up after a long play session but i just remembered a post i've been wanting to make (ty post nut clarity lmao) so here's a rushed and kinda sleepy version of it:
please for all my everyone's out there, please remember to give yourself aftercare if you're someone engaging with kink online. especially if the content you're engaging in usually touches/exacerbates any real-world emotional stuff for you. whether it's cnc or degradation or anything, just because it's content you're consuming online doesn't mean you're immune to needing aftercare once the sexy part is over.
i feel like aftercare is something we often think of as being a thing that happens between partners after sex, and obviously yes that's a big chunk of it, just because you're playing solo doesn't negate the wacky stuff the chemicals in your brain can do, nor that there aren't things you can do for yourself to help ease out of it!
i know i personally tend get subdrop quite frequently, maybe 60-70% of the time, not counting basic "jorkin it to a generically sexy thought/image simply for maintenance/insomnia purposes", and that shit sucks (and also importantly this does not apply to just subs!! doms have feelings and deserve aftercare and gentleness i just personally happen to only get subdrop so that's why i'm using it for reference).
anyway, yeah. obviously. feeling bad or guilty or unclean or broken after sex sucks. it's stupid and i wish nobody had to deal with it, but brains are weird and bodies are weird and it's okay and it's normal and it will pass, and also:
there are things you can do to mitigate it (you hopefully definitely don't need me to tell you that) and you can still do a lot of those things alone (you maybe potentially might have needed me to remind you of that?)
so anyway yeah! here are some things off the top of my head that help me personally reduce bad feelings after sex but also you are a whole different person so you may have different things that help but i am just making this post to encourage you to incorporate Something and your something might be different than my something and that's okay and beautiful etc etc.
ANYWAY list time:
shower/bath/etc (for to get clean physically but also for to relax)
drink some water! i know you are dehydrated!! drink!!!!!
eat something also!! is good. whether that is a chocolate bar or a huge bowl of stew with thick slices buttered bread is your choice
stretch! gently! joint pain is terrible and i know because i Get It a lot and doing some light stretches Will help
put on something. whether that's a comfort show or an audio or some music or like. funny wolf videos compilation #32 or whatever.
perfumes/scented balms are nice if you like sensory stuff.
breathing exercises good to help bring you down if it's been an intense session
also just like. go hug a plushie. i know you have one.
arhkbgh end of list i am too tired to think of anything else.
POINT IS there is lots you can do to take care of yourself BY yourself and you deserve to feel good and this will help maybe hopefully i think. i've been historically bad with doing self aftercare and i'm getting Better at it and i think it's a good thing to have in your toolbelt for a generally more comfortable sex life
anyway yeahhhh i'm signing off. i've got a shower to take and a bag of chips to eat and a podcast to listen to and Sleep to get. good night stay safe ily mwah
If you have ever known anyone with a kink for being hit, or beat up, or raped and you're okay with them, you also gotta be okay with the people who's kink it is to do the hitting, the beating, or the raping. At the end of the day, we're adults playing pretend, and that's it.
protip if ur messing around with someone and you suddenly want to stop, you need to verbally tell them. mildly changing your whimpering and whining to subtle crying and sad whimpering is not good enough. it will take them too long to notice. speak up. because you're uncomfortable, having a not good time, but also because you've now put the other person in the position of doing harm to you without their knowledge.
it makes you feel like they're hurting you when they should stop (despite you not speaking up) and it makes them feel like a sexual assaulter. thanks for coming to my ted talk.
I love brown nipples, I love happy trails, I love hairy forearms, I love hairy armpits, I love hairy bush, I love big areolas, I love stretch marks, I love big noses, I love thick eyebrows, I could go on and on. Free yourself from overly curated (and often times white cis heteronormative) erotica
As a young adult, I used to think what messed me up as a kid was having completely unfiltered access to things I wasn’t ready for, like NSFW content, gore, heavy discourse, and the existence of predatory adults online. But now that I’m older, I see it differently.
The problem wasn’t what I had access to. It was that I didn’t have access to a safe adult I could actually talk to; someone I could trust to help me without immediately cutting me off from everything and everyone. I remember getting messages from strangers on Skype. I didn’t even respond. But when my parents found out, they banned me from using it entirely. That meant losing most of my contact with friends outside of school. So what did I do? I went behind their backs. And once I was hiding, I couldn’t tell them when something actually dangerous was happening, like when I started being groomed. By the time things escalated, I was already alone with it.
I think about an episode of Scared Straight where a girl was dragged through a prison because she’d been talking to adult men online. She wasn’t doing that because she was reckless or malicious; she was lonely. Her parents weren’t present, she was being bullied at school, and these men gave her attention, told her she was pretty, told her she mattered. She was already being harmed. And the adults in her life responded by terrorizing her. Humiliating her. Calling her a slut. Telling her she deserved it. Breaking her to pieces.
What lesson does that actually teach? Not “this is dangerous, come to us.” It teaches: If you get hurt, we will hurt you more. Do you really think that makes her stop, or does it just make the predators look safer by comparison? They might as well have driven her straight into the jaws of those predators with torches and pitchforks. Because when every path back to safety is lined with punishment, kids don’t run away from danger. They run deeper into it.
If you want kids to be safe, stop treating them like problems to control and start treating them like people worth protecting. Stop ripping away their autonomy the second they make a mistake or encounter something risky. Stop teaching them that honesty will cost them everything.
Be the person they can come to without fear of losing their entire world. Because safety isn’t built through control, it’s built through trust. And if you aren’t safe for them to tell the truth to, then you aren’t keeping them safe at all.
Idk I think it’s very hot when someone tells you exactly what they were thinking about while they were touching themselves. Like yes please tell me how you were thinking about fucking me senseless while you touched yourself. That is so so hot good god
fuck, I just realized that if I spend my life being too intimidated to make art then that means I don't even get to make bad art. I end up making NO art. that's way worse
i need to be called a dumb fucking dog while my mouth is stuffed with cock. grab my hair and fuck my mouth while i grind my leaky cunt on ur foot plssssss i'll be so good plsplspls :((
kaledo-art
theartofmadeline
dailybridgerton
tangentwithtanner
kianamaiart
yousharknotpass
ellievsbear
