Source: #mosesontheplain on 小红书 (and thanks to @pleasantcowboywhispers for reposting here)
Did anyone order an unnecessarily detailed overanalysis of Max shamelessly fondling George's back/waist on the podium??? Yes???? Okay well let's get on with it because I have been slowly losing my last remaining crumbs of sanity about it and so should you
First of all in the beginning, you can see Max is holding something in his hands, which he decides on holding in his right hand where Carlos will be (so that his left is free to grip onto George for dear life, of course)
The grip itself is already damning enough (hand around the whoooole waist, mind you) but not only does he hold George like they're getting ready for a wedding photoshoot, he then gives his waist not one but TWO little itsy bitsy squeezes. Then he is suddenly struck by a bout of self-awareness (wait, fuck, is he going to call HR on me? Am I taking advantage of a sick victorian child who is probably about to cough a lung out? Shit.) and decides that his cap is actually not really properly placed and needs some adjustment right about now, gives George yet another pat before taking his hand off.
(Before that though, in another angle of this you can see him try to shuffle his shoulder to be under George's arm, also moving his hips/leg awkwardly around (??? too close??? not close enough??? erm. help.))
When Max decides that he'd rather be touching his cap actually, George spontaneously decides that it's a great moment to wave vaguely to the crowd. Of course, this is not worth reading too much into and probably something he would've done anyway, but this is f1blr and this is gax so allow me to be Insane and say George in this moment feels a bit awkward and is looking for something to do with the arm that was until now occupied caging Max's hand-on-waist in. (maybe we're still not Fine after all? we're still akward?? I get it haha yeah no it's fine really oh hiiii crowd!) and then Max because he can't help himself decides that his cap is a lot less fun to fondle than George's back and he would rather go back to doing that, actually. Instant devilish grin on his face. He knows what he's doing.
Then when his hand lands back on George's back, he realizes that it's not quite his waist and he would need to move it a bit further down if he wants to actually be gripping onto George's waist for dear life. For whatever reason. Very necessary, for the, erm. Something.
So what does he do to fix this? You know, when you need to reposition your hand on someone's body and you two aren't really that close, the safest course of action is usually to take the hand off and relocate it at the desired spot. Which of course Max doesn't do, going instead for the "sliding my hand down your side platonically while taking a platonic group picture" technique, a widely used trick in many Getting Called to the HR Office speedruns any%. Max Verstappen is of course a man of many talents, and was attempting his first run while in the midst of taking podium pictures. Truly a generational multitasker.
However, he runs into an unexpected bug known as "George is actually into it to a degree that is embarrassing", as can be observed by the way George's lip twitches trying to repress a doe-eyed besotted grin and only half-succeeding, and the way he immediately pulls his arm back down after deciding that he has waved to the crowd enough. He then proceeds to give Max's shoulder a squeeze (you can see it in the other angle), completely derailing any of Max's HR speedrun attempts and instead fully turning this into a weirdly intimate PDA session with the grace of someone torn between the appeal of plausible deniability and the overwhelming urge to get on his knees and put 4-time f1 world champion dick in his mouth.
When it's done, Max gives George's back a final pat and goes to change the thing he was holding in his left hand to his right. Because that's his preferred hand to hold things, you know. He must have forgotten, with all the photographers crowding around them, how silly of him!
Anyway yes this is a completely reasonable amount of words to type about 15 seconds of footage wdym
