HOLY SHIT GUYS I'M MARRIEDDDD🥹😭😭😭🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂
@xavierfrogprincess
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Today's Document

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣

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@sylusbigapples
HOLY SHIT GUYS I'M MARRIEDDDD🥹😭😭😭🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂
@xavierfrogprincess
THINGS HE DOES THAT ARE SO ATTRACTIVE !
abstract: your boyfriend just does things that makes your heart flutter and your panties dampen <3
ft. rafayel, sylus, zayne, xavier, caleb
cw: insp by the tiktok trend ; fluff + smut; body worship, somno, riding, fingering | [implied short reader with caleb + chubby reader w/ rafayel; implied yandere! caleb] - unedited <3
⊹ ࣪ ˖ rafayel qi ; the way he’s so clingy
whenever rafayel manages to get some time with you, of course he's going to be clingy. his arms are going to be glued around your plush tummy for the whole time he's lounging around with you. his head resting on your shoulder while doing any task with you in front of him. even when he paints, he'd have you sitting between his legs or on his lap, one hand caressing and rubbing circles on your love handles or plush thighs, while the other focuses on the canvas in front of him.
but of course, his clinginess isn't only limited outside the bedroom. and that alone, gets you so turned on.
"shh, don't run away. stay w'me..." he'd whine, an arm wrapped around your tummy and only tightening the more you arched your back away from him. it was tortuous—absolutely insane. normally, he'd be sassy with it, still having a little bit of a joking tone, but when he's fucking you, holding your leg up while he bullies his cock inside you from the side, he turns so needy and clingy, and you fucking love it.
"so pretty... so gorgeous... c'mon, i like it when you're close to me..."
⊹ ࣪ ˖ sylus qin ; the way he moves you gently by your waist
even though you're at a stage in your relationship where you're comfortable with everything sylus does, you still find your heart beat faster every time sylus gently moves you by your waist to get you out of his way.
"move, sweetheart." he'd speak so smoothly while he just moves you so gently, so . of course you'd be acting all shy and flustered. but oh, even when you two have sex, his touches just hold so much weight.
he’d be sitting on one of his elaborate chairs, with you propped up on his lap grinding against his cock before he could ever be inside you. then, even when you try to sink down on him, sylus would have his hands on your hips, slowly pushing you down and helping while you cried out.
“don’t cry, pretty girl. shhh, don’t cry…” you’d be clinging onto him, arms wrapped around him while you could feel him fill you up—and not even being able to take all of him. you would be struggling, but of course, he’d help you. he'd angle his own hips, slightly slouch while keeping the hold on you firm while slowly slamming you onto him. and then when you choose to move your hips all sensually in figure-8s, his light touches would continue and he would rub circles on your skin—a contrast to how he'd move you.
"shit...yeah, sweetheart. keep moving those hips like that."
⊹ ࣪ ˖ zayne li ; the way he lifts his sleeves up + holds eye contact
you know that zayne gets busy as a doctor. but you can't help but just stare at he way he lifts his sleeves up whenever he has a demanding task. you really can't help but stare at the way his arms. the way that the veins on his forearms would be more evident every time he flexed without even knowing how that affected you.
"you know, some people try to be more subtle when they stare." he’d say something like that, because of course zayne pays attention to how you’d stare. he'd notice how you'd look away or how your expression would falter every time he held eye contact with you. you just got flustered over everything.
oh and it's especially even hotter when he enacts on his observations.
"so impatient for me, aren't you?"
he’d roll up his sleeves, crouching down while you’d sit on his desk, panties pulled down while he played with your pussy. he would be rubbing on your clit with one hand and thrusting his pretty fingers with the other; a slightly flustered expression would grace his face. but god, every time he did so, every time he would do that, he would look up at you and hold eye contact, wanting to see your cute little reactions as he ruined you on his desk.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ xavier shen ; the way his voice gets when he wakes up
there's something about the way that xavier's voice gets every time he wakes up beside you. maybe it's the way that it's much quieter and deeper than usual, or that hot vocal fry that adds onto his usually meek voice. he can get quite clingy, especially in the morning, but the way he says things when he barely wakes up—the way he speaks so gently, makes you so flustered.
"shh... just 3 more minutes. let me just hold you for a bit more." he'd snuggle up against you, muttering some weak pleas on how he doesn't want to get out of this position with you just yet. and same thing for morning sex…
“don’t wanna get out of this position…” he’d have you in pronebone, with his arms caging you and yours wrapped around his neck while he’d slowly fuck you, his body and weight pressed against you. the both of you would still be half asleep, clinging onto each other under the covers.
maybe if you were in a hurry, you’d yelp a little ‘we have to get up!’, but your pleas would fall upon deaf ears.
“mmm..not yet.”
⊹ ࣪ ˖ caleb xia ; the way he would condescendingly tease you
the nickname he's implaced upon you being 'pipsqueak' is teasing and condescending enough, but sometimes when he's feeling really sassy, caleb just keeps going with that. it's bad enough that he's taller than you, but he would just crouch down—a smile etched on his face and speak with a tone that was laced with playful malice.
"mhm? yeah? how nice." and of course, even with that dark tone and accompanying mocking smile, your heart just does a little leap in your chest; you can't help it, despite him doing so just to mess with you. something is too high up? he'd mess with you with a 'awh, can't reach up and get it?'
but when you have sex, that condescending tone gets worse; his teasing overall gets worse. "awh, pips. can't take it, huh? c'mon sweet girl... you can do it, can't you?"
even in the most basic position like missionary, it's hard to get away from whatever remarks he might make, but regardless, it was still hot. just the way he would slam into you, pressing your tummy bulge hard with his free hand while he held your hand with his other, tangling your fingers together.
oh god... he was mean. you would be crying and he’d have such a dark look on his face, relishing in the fact that he’s the only one to have you like this.
because he knows damn well you like that.
-
-
-
a/n: first lads post ever... what do we think...? (i'm so fucking scared i'm a baby lads fan i'm not that seasoned yet...)
masterlist <3 — check out my recent lads work !
Happy Birthday babyyyyyyyy🤭❤️ Thank you so much for being born, my love.... I hope you have a wonderful day ahead and be prepared for the surprise I prepared for you, hehe~😊💜✨
Btw, this is out of context, but-
Lebieeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Would you hate me, even if I love cilantro so much that I want it in every meal of the day! (Given, the dish is savoury like Indian food, that is.)
I promise that you might just come to like cilantro after I cook the chicken recipe I learnt from my mom the other day....
You just need to be brave enough to try🥹🫂~
'kay, bye! Ily 3k!😘🥰
--- Moonie🌛
*Caleb sings* Happy birthday to me happy birthday to me happy birthday to meeeee, I love my pipsqueak next to me :)
I don't mind if you have cilantro *caleb chuckles* I just... won't be kissin' ya until you wash up after a meal. I've tried! I can't do it.
Hiii, Sy!
Jaan, I'm sorry for my inconsistency in replying to your messages last week (cuz of the mission...), but I'm back now! So forgive me this time, pls😭🤧. And pls just give me my hugs!!!!🥹❤️
---Moonie🌛✨ (the cuddle monster)
You’re late. Mission or not, you disappeared.
Forgiveness, sure. Hugs? I’ll think about it.
And Moonie?
Welcome back.
First thing you see after you zoom in is how you die
How you dying 👀
𝐕𝐎𝐖𝐒 | TWO
Zayne Li x Fem!Reader
You didn't know what you were expecting when you agreed to marry Dr. Zayne, but it surely wasn't love.
A man still haunted by the voice of his late, first love, you knew you'd never be able to replace her. Yet, knowing can't always result in acceptance. And when your heart begins to yearn for more than just to be a responsibility to your cold husband—what are you supposed to do with these unwanted feelings?
Tropes: Arranged Marriage, Angst, Unrequited Love.
Warnings: Toxic family dynamics, slutshaming, blackmail (not to reader), implied abuse of authority, emotional trauma, mentions of the following - blood, accident, defamation, death. (7.4k wc)
A/N: I just wanna thank everyone for showing so much love in the last chapter. I was so overwhelmed by the response that it motivated me to pump out chapter two iejdidjs happy reading! Comments and reblogs are appreciated <3
<Series Masterlist> | Chapter 1
Meeting Zayne wasn't a push from fate.
Like every occurrence in your life, contrived after meticulously weighing the pros and cons it'd reflect on your family name—this too, was an arrangement.
You remember the day vividly; as if it was just yesterday.
𝐕𝐎𝐖𝐒 | TWO
Zayne Li x Fem!Reader
You didn't know what you were expecting when you agreed to marry Dr. Zayne, but it surely wasn't love.
A man still haunted by the voice of his late, first love, you knew you'd never be able to replace her. Yet, knowing can't always result in acceptance. And when your heart begins to yearn for more than just to be a responsibility to your cold husband—what are you supposed to do with these unwanted feelings?
Tropes: Arranged Marriage, Angst, Unrequited Love.
Warnings: Toxic family dynamics, slutshaming, blackmail (not to reader), implied abuse of authority, emotional trauma, mentions of the following - blood, accident, defamation, death. (7.4k wc)
A/N: I just wanna thank everyone for showing so much love in the last chapter. I was so overwhelmed by the response that it motivated me to pump out chapter two iejdidjs happy reading! Comments and reblogs are appreciated <3
<Series Masterlist> | Chapter 1
Meeting Zayne wasn't a push from fate.
Like every occurrence in your life, contrived after meticulously weighing the pros and cons it'd reflect on your family name—this too, was an arrangement.
You remember the day vividly; as if it was just yesterday.
BEFORE WE TURN TO ICE ୧ .ᐟ ft. zayne li.
summary. you were each other’s home, your addiction, your downfall—and in the end, the only way to survive was to say goodbye.
word count. 2,5k
disclaimer. angst in capital letters (brace yourselves y’all), first-person pov, unhealthy relationship, cursing, mentions of sex but nothing explicit, both reader and zayne are emotionally unstable reader and zayne. this is completely inspired by ugetsu and akihiko’s relationship from the anime “given”.
nic’s notes ♡ this is maybe the most precious piece of writing i’ve created, and i’m utterly proud of it. i know smutty one-shots tend to get the most attention, but please give this one a chance <3 also, i recommend listening to this playlist i created while reading!
i loved him.
i loved him truly. purely. sincerely.
but it was each other’s presence that drowned us. that silenced us.
that kept us together even when the pain was unbearable.
it was the destiny’s greatest mystery for us to have met. him as a cardiac surgeon, me as a hunter. every day’s danger was the excuse for meeting each other, for gracing him with my presence—and vice versa.
the chilly ambience of the hospital almost lulled me to sleep. with my back pressed against the back of a rather uncomfortable chair, i sat in the middle of a hospital corridor.
never thought it’d now become a place i’d curse at. it didn’t matter if i were bleeding to death.
don’t save me.
don’t let him save me.
Polaris
Synopsis: You made the biggest mistake of your life: a drunken one night stand with the man you loved... who happened to also be hopelessly pinning after someone else. In an ironic way you two were in the exact same shoes, but when the alcohol wore off and you woke up to the sight of him naked beside you, the only thing you could think of was to RUN. (Lyrics from "Merry Christmas, Please Don't Call" by the Bleachers)
Warning(s): Angst, Hurt/Comfort, if you don't want comfort only read the first part LOL. No fancy evol shenanigans, Zayne is just an imperfect man.
8.2k words
A/N: GUESS WHO'S A PHD CANDIDATE NOW?! In my first poll, y'all wanted Zayne + hidden child trope, so I HAVE COME TO DELIVER. I will always go feral for pining and (un)requited loves. also tumblr formatting is legitimately driving me crazy. I will fix the large vs small font slowly.
Last Words of a Dying Star
is it over now? | zayne.
✩ synopsis: you run to reddit for advice when it comes to your unsteady relationship with zayne. ✩ pairing: zayne x non!mc reader / wc: 4034 ✩ cw/tags: slight angst, hurt/comfort, misunderstanding ✩ crossposted in my ao3 ✩ a/n: written in second pov but will be in first pov with the reddit posts. not proofread, first time writing in a while pls be kind !
r/relationship_advice
u/cheesecake_plushie73 ∙ 12h
I (25F) feel like my boyfriend (27M) is falling out of love with me, and I don’t know what to do.
As the title states. For additional context, I (25F) am your average girl. I work at a fairly well-known company in the personnel division, doing the most mundane tasks you could think of. Aside from that, I am often one of the faces of the division as I deal with the people in our company everyday so I’ve memorized all of their quirks and personalities–but that’s about it when it comes to me. On the other hand, my boyfriend (27M) is a profound professional in the medical field. He (quite literally) saves lives every day, and he is very well-known in his line of work. If I add more context as to his career, you would immediately find out who he is–the stark difference between us already says a lot.
We met a few years back through a common friend who is also a professional in the medical field and his close colleague at the hospital where he works. Throughout the relationship, he has been everything that I asked for. However, all of this started when last month, I was notified by my boss that I wasn’t promoted to the position I was vying for. It was heartbreaking. And naturally, I thought of seeking refuge with my boyfriend. When I messaged him, asking him to meet later that evening, he turned it down, saying he was finally meeting with his childhood best friend (24F). If it were any other day, I would’ve been ecstatic, as this was the same friend he mentioned to me that he had lost contact with. But that night, I felt as though it was the cruelest timing of the universe, especially how he described to me with earnest fervor everything about his best friend. How she was a rising hunter, and she found contact with him through a magazine article about him (yes, he’s that famous). However, I couldn’t bring myself to ruin his evening. And so, initially, I understood the situation since I don’t want to seem an overbearing, controlling partner. And so, I thought it would be best if I instead sat with my feelings first and sought comfort from him in the following days.
But those days did not come. Instead, I was always greeted by his cold exterior, oftentimes he would be too busy to respond to me as he was in the midst of his hospital shifts, and once he did become free, he either was too exhausted to converse properly or would spend his time with anyone else other than me. Mostly, his best friend too.
While I am aware that his best friend is also in a relationship (with their other childhood friend, it seems), I still can’t help but feel uneasy about the situation.
It has been a month since I noticed this behavior, and I’m not sure whether this was already occurring before, as my boyfriend could come off as nonchalant at times and stoic.
Usually, I’m not the one to jump to conclusions, but from the situation itself, it seems that my boyfriend has been drifting apart from me. I really love him and adore him, but with each day that we spend apart, it further breaks my heart as it feels like he no longer acknowledges our relationship. Is this worth fighting for, or is our relationship beyond saving at this point?
EDIT: Please do not post this on other social media sites, I’m afraid he might see.
⬆️1,304 💬252
u/linkonsfinest ∙ 12h
first off, i’m so sorry to hear about your career rejection. i’m sure it will redirect you to greener pastures, OP. anyway, about your relationship, this sounds like a classic case of sitting down and talking about your feelings with him. have you tried that, OP?
also, whether you like it or not, he is bound to see this post since it’s public, after all.
⬆️482
u/cheesecake_plushie73 ∙ 12h Thank you for your kind words. But I would have if he had given me just a few minutes of his time. EDIT: What’s with the downvotes? ⬇️-167
u/starbunny ∙ 11h Ignore them, OP. It’s reddit after all lol. My advice is that U try and think abt what what matters most for U. Ur relationship with him or ur peace. The meeting with the bestfriend part may seem sketchy but U know ur boyfriend best than compared to us strangers on the internet. ⬆️254
u/fishie_painter307 ∙ 11h
Seems to me that you have hidden insecurities, OP. There was a tendency to look down on yourself in the paragraphs you have written, while you write about your boyfriend as if he had discovered the cure to the protocore syndrome. But it sounds like you’re just as amazing and as hardworking as he is. But I didn’t come here to give you free therapy sessions lol. I fear the only way we can find an end to this is to sit down with him and talk about the icky, uncomfortable thing called feelings. For now, try assessing what you have right now, and consider talking with him as soon as his schedule clears up. Better yet, just barge into his office and demand some answers lol, since he seems like he isn’t the type to care until the last minute.
⬆️393
u/cheesecake_plushie73 ∙ 10h The last comment seemed unnecessary, but it felt like cold water splashing me. Maybe it’s the truth. Thanks. ⬆️146
u/evil_overlord901 ∙ 10h
Since he’s a doctor, you should just pretend you’re on the verge of death to make him worry and as revenge for his neglect, hahaha.
⬇️-673
u/cheesecake_plushie73 ∙ 10h I’m not that crazy enough. ⬆️206
Zayne has been staring at his phone for what seems like hours. But really, it has only been twenty minutes since Greyson hurled open his office doors with a frown etched unusually on his face.
“What have you done to my friend?” Greyson asked, brows knit together. “Pardon?” Zayne could only reply.
Greyson scoffs, running a hand through his hair, “They were right, you really don’t seem to care.”
“What is going on?” Zayne asks, finally setting down the pen he has in between his fingers. “Is there something the matter?”
The younger man holds back a grumble under his breath, “Just see for yourself.” He then set his phone across Zayne as the latter read the title.
I (25F) feel like my boyfriend (27M) is falling out of love with me, and I don’t know what to do.
“What is this supposed to be, Greyson?” Zayne asks, “Is this what the staff are gossiping about in the hallway today?”
He recalls the way the nurses and doctors hushed murmurs in the hallways, sneaking glances towards Zayne as he waltzes through the bleak corridors. He paid no mind to it as he knew it wasn’t his business to pry into whatever they were gossiping about.
“They were gossiping about you, Dr. Zayne.”
“What?”
The conversation seemed like it was going nowhere, so Greyson just sighed defeatedly while retrieving his phone. A resounding ping! echoed from Zayne’s phone.
“I sent you the link to the post. Make sure to read every single word and tell me that isn’t you.”
That was twenty minutes ago, and Zayne was sure that every word was tattooed on the crevices of his brain at this point. But what else should he do now that he’s memorized it? He’s sure at this point that user cheesecake_plushie73 is most definitely you. There’s no denying it, with the way you described the circumstances and your impeccable writing style that mimics his. Yes, he’s certain it’s you.
But now what?
Smoke curls from the teacup you’ve set down seconds ago as you inhale the autumn breeze from your balcony. Your phone is on temporary do not disturb from the hundreds of Reddit notifications you received since last night. You observe the sky-high buildings and rigid architecture of the city, eyes fixated on nothing and everything all at once. It has been a month since you received the news, the words of your boss linger at the back of your mind, and the rejection email sits heavily on your phone, tucked away from the thousands of junk mail you receive. The nonacceptance of your promotion still gnaws at your chest despite the long time you’ve spent trying to accept it. Nevertheless, you have slowly come to terms with the rejection, chanting the line that the redditor told you in your post–that it’s just redirection. However, you can’t help but feel that the redirection that the rejection launched in your way also involved your relationship with Zayne.
You’re sure you’ve told Zayne about the promotion, how you applied for it, and how the chances of getting in seemed highly possible. And yet, you can’t seem to recall whether Zayne was supportive of it or if he had said anything at all. Your mind has been all muddled and cloudy with all of the heartbreaking scenarios you’ve made up since you received his message that he was meeting his childhood friend.
It was silly, and since then, you’ve felt perpetually stupid for thinking horrendously of your boyfriend. You know he wouldn’t cause such a scene like that, to see another woman behind your back–it was preposterous! The thought still makes you gag to the point where you couldn’t believe you actually went and logged into an online forum just to seek advice. The idea alone was enough to make you physically convulse and cringe because you knew that if he wanted out of your relationship, he would’ve already done so.
Which somehow makes you hurt more.
You’ve gone uncharacteristically by posting at an online forum just to seek advice from some stranger on the internet to tell you what to do. But how could you blame yourself? You’re just trying to make the situation better for you. But what is it going to take just to feel okay? Is it hope? Is it love? Do you talk? Or is it therapy?
You sigh for the umpteenth time of the day, watching the glow of the sun turn orange and pink as it continues to slowly illuminate your space. For some reason, despite being on a (fake) sick leave, you couldn’t bring yourself to stay inside your house.
It just felt… emptier.
The doom and gloom of the space makes the apartment stuffier than usual, and no matter how much you’ve dusted the space, you’ve felt like going through different stages of your chest tightening. Perhaps it’s because of the memories that it carries, the way the air permeates Zayne’s faint perfume, or his touch that lingers in your skin when you settle on the couch, remembering how he used to tightly hold you on Friday evenings while watching something.
You just couldn’t take it.
The apartment feels heavier, and you couldn’t bring yourself to go back inside. And so, as a remedy, you find yourself tucked away on the balcony with a book you’ve forgotten the plot to, sitting idly on the table beside you. Your mind races a thousand thoughts, all of which contain the same wish. How you wish that everything would just end soon and that tomorrow the sun will rise again, and you can try again.
But what could be said for a new day when your chest is unwillingly clenching every time you think of Zayne? You want to be angry at him for neglecting you just like that one Reddit user said. You want to do something impulsive, irrational, and unmistakably stupid just to see him come running and say what you’ve been wanting to hear for the past month.
And yet, what is that something that you want to hear from him?
How are you?
I missed you?
I’m sorry?
…Let’s break up?
And what were you going to respond anyway?
I’m okay?
I missed you, too?
I understand?
…Is it her?
Oh dear heavens. You think to yourself, burying your face in your hands. You feel ridiculous and helpless. The Reddit users were right. You should talk to him soon, lest you lose your mind over all of this.
Succumbing to the most vile thoughts you have ever conceived, you didn’t notice the indisputable beeps of your keypad door lock echoing in your apartment. Neither the loud swinging of the door nor the frantic removing of shoes by the doorway, nor the heavy padding throughout the dim space.
Your head only whips in attention when you hear the door frame to the balcony rattling behind you.
“There you are.”
Oh.
“I’ve gone to your work, and they told me you were sick… Are you okay?”
Oh.
You sit upright, smiling meekly at Zayne. “You surprised me.”
Zayne closes the glass door behind him and carefully takes the vacant seat beside the table. You dart your gaze from him and settle on your now cold tea, “Would you like some tea?” You offered. To which he shakes his head.
Silence envelops the two of you. And for once, after all the daydreaming of possibilities of when he will arrive, you don’t know what to do.
“Why would I surprise you?” He asks.
“I dunno… It’s been a while since you’ve come here. And it’s unlike you to drop by unannounced,” you say with a faint chuckle.
“Oh. I’ve left a text. But your notifications were silenced.”
“Oh.”
You picked up your phone and went to your messages, and lo and behold, he did send a message just twenty minutes ago.
“Twenty minutes ago?” You say out loud before you can even stop yourself.
“...Is there a problem?”
You sheepishly rub the back of your head before setting your phone back down, “Nothing…” You begin hesitantly, “You usually just give me a heads up at least hours prior. But it’s no big deal. I’m not complaining!” You defend.
Zayne nods at you promptly, and once again, silence wraps the two of you. You refuse to look at Zayne for a second longer than you should, afraid that the waterworks might come unwarranted.
“I see.”
You only let out a grunt of approval, eyes drifting back to the buildings across from you two. Your refusal to look at him for a second longer warranted you to miss two things:
Zayne’s usually perfect hair seemed unkempt, like he had been running his fingers through it numerous times.
He refuses to look away from you even for a second.
And yet now that he occupies your space, you don’t know how to act. Why was he here anyway? You couldn’t bring yourself to act. Not when you caught a whiff of his perfume once again, making you want to both hurl in anxiety and lunge forward at him, wrapping your arms around his waist and just burying yourself in the comforts of his chest.
Zayne wasn’t doing much better either. The moment he read the comment from user evil_overlord901, he thought about how you’d go to terrifying lengths just to gather his attention. While he knows you won’t go that far, the thought still gnaws at his brain like a pesky pest. To the point where he might’ve broken a few traffic rules just to get to your place.
The silence hangs in the air, and Zayne doesn’t seem to know what to do now that he’s seen you all safe and sound. A thousand questions were running around in his brain, but he didn’t know where to start.
Nevertheless, he kept his eyes locked on your figure. Your elbow is propped on the table, your chin resting on the palm of your hand, and your glassy eyes sporting that distant look. He didn’t miss the swell of your eyelids nor the heavy bags starting to form. And for some reason, he hates himself for it. He hates how he barely noticed anything about you for the past month, how he felt utterly selfish for casting you aside.
He loathes it.
And yet, he couldn’t throw himself a pity party when all he wants right now is to take you within his comfort.
After a couple more minutes of silence between you two, Zayne inhales. “...Cheesecake_plushie73?”
“...What?” You turn your head towards him mechanically, blinking slowly at his words.
“Does that…phrase ring a bell to you?”
You chuckle nervously in response, “...I suppose?”
You see Zayne and his usual pensive expression written across his features. “You suppose…” He parrots.
“Why? What’s that about?” You ask, your voice a bit smaller.
“Nothing… Greyson just showed me this post from a forum that seems eerily like you.”
Like us.
“Oh. I see.”
“...Have I been neglecting you?”
“What?”
“I have, haven’t I?”
You attempt to school your expression into something neutral, but you couldn’t deny the wild thumping of your chest when you see the way his eyes bore into yours with such intensity that you were certain you could melt from it. Zayne reaches out from his seat, clasping both of your hands with his much bigger ones. You hold back a flinch, startled from the sudden contact after being deprived of one for way too long. His hands were warm, you note, much warmer than your freezing ones.
Before you could even respond, he abruptly stands up, which makes the chair almost tilt back, and immediately, he kneels across you. Your eyes widen, wanting to scramble and make him rise from the cramped space of your balcony, but before you could even do anything, his lips ghost over your fingers, and you feel electricity coursing through your veins.
“I’m sorry,” was all Zayne could murmur, “Your heart must be heavy from the weight of carrying our burdens.”
Your breathing constricts, and you feel your eyes well from his words alone. “It was foolish of me not to notice how you were going through such a terrible time, and I am so sorry for letting you go through that without me,” he continues, pressing chaste kisses on each of your fingers.
“Zayne, it’s nothing–”
“Please do not belittle yourself any further. I can’t stand seeing you speak so lowly of yourself, my love,” he says with finality that makes you clamp your mouth shut. He then turns his gaze back to you, his eyes soft and glassy, and you don’t miss the way his lips tremble. He then tightens his hold on your hands, pressing them onto his chest, “Do you feel how my heart only beats for you? How its pace quickens when I catch just a sight of your silhouette in the crowd?”
And you do.
The way his heart rapidly pounds in his chest, even when you lie on top of him as you snuggle, or even as mundane as fleeting embraces, when it’s time to say goodbye.
You always feel it.
“Only you have that effect on me, my love. And I despise myself for having you doubt my love for you. I have done poorly recently, so it seems,” Zayne continues, his hands still clutched tightly against yours. “There’s absolutely no one else that could make me feel this way. Only you.”
“Zayne…” Your lips wobble from the declaration of his love.
“Please forgive me for being such a terrible lover, my dear. There was no excuse to it,” he says, almost pleadingly.
You feel a lump forming in your throat, and before you know it, Zayne already unclasps his hand from yours, and you feel his warm thumb gently caressing the salty tears from your cheeks.
“It was just unfair, Zayne. How… how I felt so alone and miserable without having you by my side, while it felt like you were doing more than okay,” you mumble through fits of your tears.
“I was a fool, my love. Please don’t cry, it hurts me more than you know,” he whispers, inching closer to you.
You shake your head, “I’ve soon come to terms with the rejection, but I couldn’t accept how I was so lonely throughout the process. I just wanted you. But you had other plans. Other people to meet. Other people who seemed more important than I am, and I h-hated that…!”
The knot in your chest tightens as you finally let the damn burst wide open.
With no words left to say, Zayne rises from the floor and engulfs you in his tight embrace, letting your tears damp his shirt. He strokes your head carefully, humming to you as he tries his damndest not to cry with you.
The sight alone makes him physically ache as he continues to wallow in his regret and pity. For the first time in his life, Zayne feels helpless. He could only bring himself to hush you with comforting words like, “It’s okay, my love. I’m here now.” Or “I was an idiot. I didn’t love you properly when you needed it the most.”
And across you two, the sun slowly began to finally set, casting the last golden glow onto your skin. You claw tightly onto his back, desperate to feel that he is there with you and nowhere else.
“I’m sorry,” you hiccup, your tears slowly dissipating. “I felt so terrible that I posted our relationship on an online forum.”
“It’s okay, my love. You didn’t know what else to do, and that’s okay,” he murmurs. “I’m sorry too for neglecting you and hurting you in the process. I never desired for you to hurt because of me.”
You shake your head, but you couldn’t bring yourself to say that it’s okay. You swallowed thickly, “I forgive you,” was all you could say.
“And I don’t deserve such forgiveness from the sweetest girl in the world.”
You chuckled half-heartedly, digging yourself closer to his chest and inhaling his scent much further, memorizing the warmth of his body, and how he holds you.
“Am not,” you retort jokingly.
“Yes, you are, miss cheesecake_plushie73.”
You weakly punch his stomach in response, laughing softly at his attempt to lighten the situation. He sighs contentedly, pressing a kiss on the crown of your head.
“I love you, my dear.”
r/relationship_advice
u/cheesecake_plushie73 ∙ 12 mins ago
UPDATE: I (25F) feel like my boyfriend (27M) is falling out of love with me, and I don’t know what to do.
I think I owe everyone an update here. My boyfriend and I had finally talked things through, and all my worries had vanished. Apparently, he was meeting up with all his childhood best friends, and it had been a decade since they last saw each other. He also apologized for the neglect, and he took two weeks off from his work to go on a short trip with me to make up for lost time. I felt silly for being worried, but he assured me that it was not silly to feel valid emotions and that we would work things through. I also apologized for closing myself off and for making up bad assumptions about his bestfriend. Anyway, I’m off to pack for our trip. Thank you all for all the advice and comments.
P.S. He also saw my post here which prompted our conversation T___T
⬆️201 💬79
u/linkonsfinest ∙ 5 mins ago
see! all you need is a good ol’ conversation and everything’s okay! glad you fixed it, OP! despite him seeing the post and prompting the conversation lol. still, congrats!
⬆️32
u/cheesecake_plushie73 ∙ 3 mins ago Thank you.
u/starbunny ∙ 5 mins ago
Nice. Glad U worked it out.
⬆️30
u/fishie_painter307 ∙ 5 mins ago
Finally some good news in my feed! Congrats, OP! Bring us some souvenir from the trip, will ya? ;)
⬆️27
u/cheesecake_plushie73 ∙ 2 mins ago Thank you! Also, my boyfriend said your comment was one of the reasonable ones including u/linkonsfinest. Except he didn’t like how you called me insecure lmao T__T ⬆️25
u/evil_overlord901 ∙ 3 mins ago
Aw, no fake deaths?
⬇️-91
u/cheesecake_plushie73 ∙ 1 min ago Please get off the internet. ⬆️90
a/n: heavily inspired by empty house by neck deep and is it over now by taylor swift !! also, i saw this reddit style format writing somewhere in tumblr and thought i had to give it a try!! comments r very much appreciated :)
loml: zayne
a/n: thank you for this request!!! this one is angstyy hehe this song is perfect for angst :3 zayne is probably ooc, sorryyyy not sorry
wc: 1,214
there were few indisputable facts in the world: the grass is green, the sky is blue, and zayne li was the love of your life.
zayne still has your name written down in his calendar for a routine checkup next tuesday, but he’s already holding your hand for the last time.
the emergency room is a blur of bright lights and shouting nurses, but everything goes perfectly silent the moment he reaches the gurney. your hunter’s uniform is torn, stained with a deep crimson. you took a fatal blow protecting your team during the cleanup and the damage was down before the ambulance doors even flew open.
zayne’s white coat is ruined, stained with your blood. his fingers are pressing down firmly against your chest, his knuckles white from the pressure.
“stay with me,” he says. his voice isn’t the calm, cool one the hospital is used to. it’s low, rough and trembling. “keep your eyes on me.”
“z-zayne.....” you whisper, voice barely louder than a breath. you slowly lift your hand, fingers shaking as you reach for his face. “it’s okay... you don’t.... you don’t have to f-fix it.”
“be quiet,” he commands softly, but his voice completely breaks on the words.
zayne catches your fingers mid air, bringing them up to his chest. his hands are usually cold but right now, your skin shedding its warmth so fast makes him feel like the warm one. “save your energy. i am not letting you close your eyes.”
“i’m just so tired,” you mumble, vision blurring as the bright ceiling lights begin to fade into darkness. “it dosen’t hurt anymore....j-just really dark.”
“look at me, please,” zayne shouts, his composure shattering. he leans down close, forehead almost touching yours, his breath hitched. he uses his free hand to cup your pale cheek, his thumb desperately wiping away the blood near your mouth. “don’t you dare close your eyes. you....you can’t, don’t leave me. stay right here.”
you wish you could stay. you wish you could stay with your zayne. but it seems death is pulling you towards its side. you try to give him one last, faint smile, fingers weakly squeezing his.
“zayne..” you breathe, using every last ounce of strength left. “i l-love you, okay?”
zayne’s heart stops. no no no. he will not lose you. he will not survive in a world where you don’t exist. where he can’t hear your sweet voice. where he can’t lay next to you. a world where he fails to save you.
“no, don’t say that. you are going to be okay.”
“say it back,” you whisper, voice slipping away as the darkness closes in. “p-please..? i want to hear it one last time.”
a look of pure agonizing panic washes over his face. “i love you. i love you so much. so stay with me, keep your eyes open–”
but your hand goes completely limp in his, your head rolling slightly to the side. beside the bed, the heart monitor lets out a long, flat, agonizing scream.
beeeeeeeeeeep.
“get back!” zayne screams at the rushing nurses, his voice cracking.
he locks his fingers onto your chest and begins CPR, forcing his weight into every compression with a terrifying, rhythmic desperation. he is a surgeon who knows exactly how much pressure a human body can take, but right now, he’s fighting a losing war against death itself.
“come back,” he whispers, his voice thickj and raw. sweat drips down his temples, his shoulders tensing as he tries to force your heart to remember how to beat. “breathe for me. i can fix this. i can’t survive without you. please.”
the monitor stays flat.
“doctor zayne... stop. it’s over,” yvonne whispers softly, reaching out to touch his shoulder. “let her go.”
zayne’s arms slowly lose their strength, locking in place above your chest. his fingers stay pressed against your skin, shivering from pure grief.
he doesn’t yell. he doesn’t smash the equipment. he just slowly collapses forward, burying his face into the hollow of your neck. his shoulders shake violently as he lets out a silent, broken sob against your skin.
zayne was a brilliant surgeon, but for the first time, his hands feel completely useless.
Nothing was going right for Zayne today, exhaustion and cling on his weary form like a second suit, an intern messed up his medical files in an attempt to clean, back to back surgeries without rest, he lost a patient today and the family blamed him, fingers pointed at him as if he was the one who delayed the surgery in the first place despite his several insistent reminders that they did not have much time. Why isn't anyone listening to him?
His steps were heavy as he closed the door of his home with a controlled slam. He quickly makes work of his coat, his tie. Vanilla notes fill the air and he knew you were home from your trip to the mall.
You hummed as you finish piping the cupcake you were working on, perking up as you hear the door open and close, albeit a little forceful and it made you flinch a bit, but Zayne was home!
With a carefully decorated cupcake in hand on a small plate, you rush to greet your boyfriend.
"Zayne! You're home!" you beamed at him in that soft, dainty voice of yours that usually soothes his weary bones, but he was too agitated to care.
You were holding out the plate for him to take, "I made some sweets! I know you a hard day at work, I understand so-"
"Mhm," he quickly says, wishing you'd drop it and just let him go, determined to just retire in bed.
"But you need to eat!" you gently huffed, "Just eat one of these while I get started on dinner, okay?"
"Put it somewhere, I'm not hungry."
"But you haven't eaten anything! Yvonne told me-"
"For god's sake, listen to me!" his voice bellowed, startling you. "Are you deaf? Are those ears just for show?"
He knew he should stop, he should shut up. But he couldn't help it as his frustration finally spill out.
"I just spent an entire day of work with idiots who don't know how to follow instructions, I don't need one in my home too." he spat bitterly, "What the hell do you know about hard work? All you do is stay in my house, eat my food, waste my money. I don't have the time to play house with you. And if there's any semblance of intelligence in that brain of yours, you'd know to get off my back."
Somewhere, in your soft little heart, something breaks. You bow your head in shame, eyes starting to water, you lips start to wobble.
He tries to walk away, accidentally nudging your shoulder in the process as the plate fell from your trembling hands, shattering into the marble tile with a sickening crash. You let out a small yelp.
That woke him up.
When he looked back, you were already kneeling. Picking up the pieces of broken shards, visibly shaken.
"My love," he uttered as it finally dawned on him what he had just done. He was quick to approach and kneel with you, holding your hands to prevent you from picking up the shards any further. He fears you might hurt yourself.
"It's alright, please, it's dangerous to-"
"I'm sorry," you let out a shaky whisper. "I'm so sorry, Zaynie," you shoulders were tight, your hands on your lap. You looked so so small. Tears fell from you eyes and onto the back of your hands.
He just shouted at you. He yelled at you. He made you feel stupid, when in fact, you were the best thing that could have ever happened to him. He made you cry.
His heart lurched, a sickening feel starting to form in his stomach.
He slowly helped you up, steering you away from the broken plate as you slowly wrap your arms around his torso, tight.
"I didn't know, I'm sorry. I'll do better." you sniffled in his chest. You hadn't stopped shaking at all.
Zayne's eyes start to sting as he looks at your trembling form. "No, no, sweetheart. I should be the one apologizing, you didn't so anything wrong, I- Fuck." the words were stuck on his throat.
You, his sweet, shy little darling, couldn't have done anything wrong, it was his fault. He let his frustration take over him and he vented his anger on you, his angel. The only person who has never made him feel like he was an asshole, yet he's being one right now.
"I'll get a j-job." you say, "A-And then I'll work hard. I-I'll do my best," you whimpered.
"Absolutely not, you don't-" he gulped, "you don't have to, I know how anxious you get around other people and- I- I'm so sorry, my love. I'm sorry." his voice wavered.
His arms wrap around your shaking shoulders, holding you impossibly closer to him as he finally let his tears free. And under the coldness of the winter night, you held each other through your tears, Zayne remembers the reason he pushes through each grueling day, it was all for you. He doesn't deserve you.
"I keep on hurting you," he croaked through his tears.
"I love you." you reply. That just made him sob harder.
As you talked things through, and Zayne doing his absolute bestest to assure and show you how much you really meant to him, you finally drifted to sleep in the bed you both shared, he slips out to clean the mess. On the floor, the ruined cupcakes sat, untouched.
He picks one up and takes a bite. It was sweet.
His favorite.
Zayne, amidst the quiet, never felt more regret. Fresh tears finds it's way down his cheeks as he slowly savored the pastry you prepared.
He will never let this happen ever again.