so it's come to this

don't make me tap the sign.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

[narcissistcookbook]

"i've got no qualms about it" meanwhile i'm over here making qualm chowder

[chemicahs]

putting butter on toasted bread is so good has anyone else tried this shit

[icksludge]

intersring dish. drop the recipe

[chemicahs]

Im so glad you asked! In my family, we’re a little different. For generations, butter has been a staple ingredient in all of our recipes. It all started in 1943 when my great grandfather Jo discovered cows. As a youngster he used to churn milk while watching the family of mourning doves on the neighbors land fight over the plumpest worms each morning. The doves feeding their children inspired grandpa Jo so much throughout the years that an idea sparked in his head. He then started the family business we all know as Bo’s kitchen (changed it to Bo for the letter B from butter.)

One day a young woman named Margeryne came into our shop and excitedly declared she also enjoyed making food in the shape of a rectangle. Upon hearing this grandpa Jo almost called his lawyer to file a lawsuit, assuming if anyone else found a way to make food in the shape of a rectangle it must be a stolen copy of our one-of-a-kind melt-in-your-mouth butter recipe. But he stopped dead in his tracks when he heard her call this rectangular food a “Loaf.” We stared in awe at her creation for what felt like hours. That’s when I tried bread for the very first time. It was shockingly delicious and wonderfully fluffy.

But, even then, I had never thought about putting butter on top of bread before. In this recipe I will show you how two rectangular foods combine to make something even greater, something that will make you say Mmmmm! like you’ve never said it before.

Ingredients:

- butter

- bread

Directions:

Toast 2 slices of bread, spread a pad of butter on the tops of each, serve warm.

[icksludge]

2 stars. it was terrible. idk what went wrong, i replaced the bread with a brick and the butter for cement paste to cut back on carbs (im on the curbs diet) and it just tasted like rocks. WTF. 😡😡

[eternalcyclicality]

[daily-mettaton]

day 178

in case it wasnt obvious... (hes aroallo and bisexual to me. also excuse the aro ring being on the wrong hand i did this in a hurry)

[steadynightruins]

Fun Fact: The Artemis II crew dressed up as characters from the AppleTV show Severance for Halloween in 2025 and even worked in them for the day

[twilightarcade]

looper

[shencomix]

[squishymishi]

This is my first time posting on Tumblr, so Idk what I'm doing lmao. But here's a quick drawing to add to my portfolio of examples of my art. (⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠)

[missholoska]

happy super late 9th anniversary, undertale 💖

[appeypie]

Made this diagram like 4 years ago and never posted. but I feel like it’s always relevant

[yammpi]

[paintedhen]

based on a peanuts strip

[cilceon]

Did you know that there are 58 tortillas in space right now and that number dwindles as the hunger of four astronauts grows

[cheasewedge]

Bothersome creature

[cheasewedge]

MY FUCKING SOUP

[orteil42]

I must not explain the joke. Explaining the joke is the joke-killer. I will face my followers who did not get the joke. I will permit them to pass over me and through me

[orteil42]

you are making this so difficult

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Fool me once, shame on you.

Fool me twice… still shame on you. What? You expecting otherwise? Who raised you? My trusting nature does not absolve you of ethical recompense! Go think about your choices.

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

forgive the version of you that didn’t know any better

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

forgive the version of yourself that knew better but did it anyway. forgive every version of yourself. we are constantly learning from our mistakes.

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

forgive the version of you that didn’t know what to do and could not have foreseen what the right choice was, if there even was one. forgive the version of you that made a choice and regretted it.