gave a shout of light

havi | late 20s they/them queer writer & witchy punk. european. i make monthly playlists & vibe. message for misc questions idk bsky | ao3 | carrd | tidal

[titsay]

guardians of the forest

[delinquentbookworm]

one time I went over to a friend's house and their housemate was making paper in the living room, and we saw this big tub full of water they were using to dissolve old scrap paper into a slurry, and everyone was immediately like "oh, you need scrap paper?" and started turning out their jacket pockets and producing expired coupons and bus tickets and crumpled receipts and old shopping lists and whatever else they'd been carrying round with them for no good reason, and passing it all to the paper-making housemate to make sure it was suitable before it got torn up and dropped into the tub, while people took turns stirring the slurry with a big wooden stick. it was strangely ritualistic, like presenting an offering to some kind of temple elder for inspection before placing it in a watery shrine to be devoured and reformed. pulp for the pulp god.

[adhdwerewolfgf]

mr sandman

man me a sand

[thesylverlining]

Make it the cutest man car door hook hand

[adhdwerewolfgf]

i cannot begin to explain the emotions i feel every day knowing that this post i made in the middle of playing tf2 when i was 16 is going to be the one thing of mine that has made the largest impact on the world by a fucking mile

[michaelnordeman]

Eurasian nuthatch/Sitta europaea/nötväcka. Värmland, Sweden (16 July 2020).

[someonehasgiventheratsapen]

Im being normal about them ❤️

[michaelnordeman]

Roe deer/Capreolus capreolus/rådjur. Värmland, Sweden (16 July 2021).

[thatadhdmood]

Trying to convince myself to start taking adhd meds is hard because what do you mean I need to take a drug to change who I am? What do you mean I'm not enough, that I need to be more? Why can't who I am now be enough?

this is why i did an investigative assesment on the effectiveness of adhd meds in highschool for my personal essay question. cause u can pick anything

understanding how adhd meds worked helped me feel less weird taking them

its all about dopamine reuptake inhibitors: thats the meds

tonic and phasic dopamine: tonic is ur baseline dopamine, while phasic is the type thats released for task.

adhd people have a lower tonic dopamine baseline.

basically when neurotypicals do a task it releases dopamine, but it leaves a little dopamine out between the gap of the receptor and doesnt take it all it, and it makes doing the next tasks easier

with adhd it takes all the dopamine out so then theres no dopamine lubricant inbetween the connections to make it easier to keep doing tasks

the medication, stops the neuron from taking all the dopamine between ur neurons, and leaves a little out, so then you have more ease doing tasks

this is why doing so simpler tasks after taking adhd meds can help it start getting working because the dopamine start getting between the receptors as your tonic dopamine levels go up

having low tonic dopamine levels makes it hard to focus and makes you crave quick dopamine hits like using your phone in order to supplement it so you can feel alert and normal.

the meds are just evening the playing field with neurotypicals

thats what i learned from my research

hope this helps!

[thatadhdmood]

i feel you may have been looking for a more emotional based compssion driven response to this

but for me facing the logic and facts helped me come to terms with it most and take away the magical thinking of a little pill thatd make me normal, if i can understand the mechanisms of whats happening in my body when I take it and how my body differs from a neurotypical for it to be able to work

[thatadhdmood]

see your getting it!

nothing to do with you as a person

vacuum in receptors too powerful, we need dopamine lube!

its a neurons issue not a moral failing

[inber]

Say you break your ankle. You could know everything there is to know intellectually about the injury. Even with this vast knowledge, you will still experience physical pain.

Now take this logic and apply it to things like ADHD, autism, clinical depression, and other less visible/divergent disabilities. You cannot think your way out of feeling.

That is to say: you are not a bad, lazy, or selfish person for struggling, even if you know why you are struggling.

[thepolymorphexperience]

Genuinely, thank you so much for this.

[michaelnordeman]

Great tit/Parus major/talgoxe, juvenile. Värmland, Sweden (16 July 2024).

[t00thpasteface]

sorry to everyone out there who thinks they have the funniest tshirt but i think i can confidently say i just saw the actual funniest tshirt just now. i passed by a beautiful black woman with long multicolor braids blowing majestically in the beach breeze & she was wearing an oversized tshirt that said in gigantic letters "WHITE BOY OF THE YEAR"

[creditednature]

a collection of wildlife using the same log to cross water, captured on a Trail Cam and posted by Bobert-24 on r/trailcam

[twerkyvulture]

btw you guys ever think about Shedinja? i didn't know this before i raised one but Shedinja is created (separated??) from Nincada/Ninjask with the same moveset, same personality... i took it to have its friendship evaluated and the woman in Verdanturf confirmed: my Shedinja knows me. it loves me. though seemingly just created, it has memories of me, and maybe even memories of being a Nincada.

and yet, Nincada's evolved form is standing right there next to Shedinja. Ninjask is the completed form, the imago, with that exact same love, those exact same memories. until that moment of evolution, the two were one Pokémon.

i can't stop wondering. what must that be like? what must it feel like, being the ghost of a living being? finding yourself empty, outside your biological body, but your body is still there and the one inhabiting it is still you? and what does Ninjask feel, seeing eyes peering out from the shell of its old form, and then finding that those eyes are its own?

[trupowieszcz-moved-deactivated2]

r/scrungycats is fucking amazing

[fruityfinch]

This one is my favourite. It’s subtle. It’s contemplative. This cat has so much to consider

[stuckinapril]

do some people know they’ll be inscribed into my heart forever no matter the silence and the distance and most of all no matter the time

[candycoatedrox]

getting characters into world-endingly intense codependent queerplatonic relationships is literally what life is all about. it is literally what we were put here on this earth to do

[shizunhelpme]

shen yuan transmigrates into mu qingfang

at first he thinks he scored because hey he's gonna live! bingge left mu qingfang alive in PIDW, so he doesn't have to worry about escaping his fate. he can just putter around his peak, tending to disciples' scrapes and growing an assortment of interesting plants

only, he soon realizes that being one of the only medical professionals in the sect, and the only one with a status high enough to be trusted with sect secrets, means he is the default GP for every. single. peak lord.

access to confidential info + sy wife beam = sy is now booked for appointments through next year and his martial siblings are throwing themselves into pits of snakes to get emergency treatment and see their sweet, tender, caring shidi/shixiong. even shen jiu starts coming in for regular checkups despite his strong aversion to them, and liu qingge starts showing up to get his wounds treated if only to bear witness to that soft smile mu qingfang lets slip when he admits he's in pain (sy isnt a sadist he just wants lqg to take care of himself! he swears its not bc he likes the sounds of lqg's grunts and groans as he resets his dislocated joints and wraps his scrapes up real tight!)

not only is he making so many unexpected friends (...every peak lord is starting courting processes but sy does NOT notice), he learns...so much drama! which is entertaining, but starts to become a heavy, heavy burden very quickly

he brings the concept of therapy into the PIDW verse expeditiously fast and sets up regular sessions, at first with the peak lords, then the head disciples, and before he knows it he's discovering a new form of mental cultivation to heal heart demons!

he discovers the qijiu backstory and decides this is how he will protect luo binghe! he just needs to get these idiots to bone!! (they both want him carnally)

[ghost-kings-court-jester]

Hua Cheng getting the equivalent of a PhD every 7 years while looking for Xie Lian sounds fucking insane, because it’s been 800 years, but it also is very real.

Like he fr stress farmed all his stats because what do you mean he runs a city, knows how to make beautiful architecture, made thousands of statues, made a temple, learnt every weapon he has, made teleportation easier —something even the Gods haven’t figured out how to do, learnt multiple forms of magic, trained a butterfly army, unearthed an ancient civilisation and taught himself the language with no Rosetta stone to work with, figured out blackmail for literally every heavenly official ever, Learnt enough about everything to challenge 33 Gods in both combat and debate.

And that’s not even counting the stuff he sped ran, like making arguably the most powerful spiritual weapon in the series, and the stuff we aren’t explicitly told, like truly he must have only calligraphy left to learn because he for sure was close to running out of everything else.