Oct 19, 2019
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#me? questioning my entire sexuality AGAIN after that convo w my mum? more likely than you'd think#bc she was like#well if you tried being straight & it didn't work then being gay is fine#& like#i'm bi#so i technically could be w a boy#maybe if i tried more or idk#it'd make everything so much easier#like there'd still be the bf standards of my parents but it'll eventually be ok#if i told my mum i'm bi she'd be like well then just be with a boy????#& i haven't really tried for guys since i discovered i'm#*i'm bi#is that a bad thing#also why do i feel guilty now#& the thing w the girl#like#idk#i want to be w her#but being in a relationship w a closeted person is a lot™ & i am a lot™ & i don't want her to go through that#like she knows i'm not fully out yet but that's abt it#she doesn't even know that my parents are rlly religious yet#like we never talk abt it#also i'm terrified of change yeet#&my anxiety is already ruining everything for me again#rant
