#{crack tag}

[pzychojinx]

deleting my dating apps because i want to meet someone the old fashioned way (i am brutally beating a man to death to maintain my extremely fragile status as captain of my pirate ship and you're my new lying ass fake cook with his silly little fake name witnessing the scene like you're both scared and horny)

[unitlead]

How does Kate feel suspecting the First Lady of Earth shagged her dad?

She's banning all aliens within 100 million yards of Earth's atmosphere thanks.

[plasmablasts]

wanna watch secret hospital? :)

no because i have ptsd from when i was telepathically induced into falling in love with the nurse who nursed me when i was in a coma by her ten year old son who really wanted a dad and that ruined my relationship with lorna permanently ( outside of when we were in space and at war )

does your mom play a character like that?

[gongzhuyue]

Whether Alex Wesker knows it or not, she's about to be given the worst and most frightening thing that a woman crippled with perfection could ever be hit with: MOTHERHOOD.

[ofamess]

"Unlike you, I might be able to sell my bath water."

[bindredtrigger]

"Those are one of my favourite foods. Have you not been paying attention?"

[rustedcrow]

"WHO SUMMONED THE DEVIL WOMAN?!"

[just1love]

　.. have you seen my boyfriend ? DON'T LOOK AT HIM THOUGH !