#((hes clueless

[basu-shokikita]

I meant to post this forever ago

[metiredlr]

Izaya: you give me many hickeys n bite marks but if I bite you my teeth hurt, I hate it. Why r u like this

Shizuo: Shut up! That's not my problem!

Izaya: fuck you Shizu-chan!

Shizuo: ok. It won't will unfuck your ass tho

[hufflautia]

Slytherin: I think I’m very good at reading and understanding other people’s feelings.  

Hufflepuff: Then how come you didn’t know I was in love with you all this time? 

Slytherin: YOU WHAT?! 

[death-scout]

Roxas not knowing what to do TM and Xion giving her good friend some solid advice

[enderon]

My favorite consistent gag in Torchwood fanfics is that Jack doesnt know anything about sports

[m4rks]

any artist that isn’t from sm:

doyoung:

[kups-war-stories-archive]

Hey kup do you have ligma?

"Ligma??"

[lovelylittlegrim]

Theo and the Little Big Problem.

Theo’s not panicking except maybe he is, he doesn’t know really, he’s never had a panic attack before but he thinks he might be close to having one right now.

“For fucks sake Liam pick up the fucking phone,” Theo growls into the receiver of his cell as another long ring drones out. He’s about to hang up the phone and gather the courage to call someone else when the ring cuts off and Liam answers.

“Theo,” Liam mumbles sleepily into the phone. “Dude, it’s 6 am, what do you want?”

“I, fuck, I have a little problem.” Theo says because there is literally no other way to explain it other than as a problem.

“Problem,” Liam sounds much more awake now. Theo Can hear the rustling of sheets as Liam slides out of bed. “What kind of problem? Are you okay?”

“I’m not sure,” Theo says slowly turning his head to stare at said problem. The little girl smiles at him toothily, her chubby hands clutching to a raggedy old stuffed dragon as she sits in the dirt across from him. Her large green eyes watching him as he speaks, appearing far more intelligent than her looks would suggest.

“I... might have accidentally kidnapped a child.”