#**oceans8

[aimmyarrowshigh]

a ranking of the movies that came out this year that are It’s 2018 And Everything Is Grimdark Depressing Ass Shit and Also Fuck Your Escapism These Franchises For Children Are Gonna Be For MEN and MEN ONLY Because It’s 2018 And ONLY MEN MATTER So Things Are Gonna Be Grimdark Depressing Ass Shit; Also It’s The Middle Third Of Trilogies Because Fuck You, as ranked from “this is a grimdark depressing departure from the underlying thematic arc of its base franchise, and also, now this thing for kids couldn’t be enjoyed by kids because it’s too scary (would watch again, but not with the same glee as every other installment in franchise)” to “godDAMN men rUIN EVERYTHING what the FUCK also STOP TRYING TO MAKE NEO-NAZIS SYMPATHETIC JUST BECAUSE IT’S 2018 AND EVERY GODDAMN WHITE MAN IN THE WORLD TURNS OUT TO SECRETLY BE A NEO-NAZI THAT DOESN’T MAKE IT COOL (would not watch again unless it was to savagely critique, Ruined Everything)”

1. jurassic world: fallen kingdom

2. the avengers: infinity war

3. star wars: the last jedi

a ranking of movies that came out this year that are It’s 2018 And Everything Is Grimdark Depressing Ass Shit Let’s Have Some Escapism, This Is More Delightful Than Pandering To Masculine Fragility

1. ocean’s eight

[aimmyarrowshigh]

very important ocean’s 8 thoughts

1) Tammy leaves her husband and gets back together with Lou and Debbie, right? As a healthy and ambitious poly-WLW triad, right? And they’re basically a trio of Carmen Sandiegos right?

2) Amita and Constance 100% fell in love on that pizza night, right? That “date” Amita went on at the end with Tinder Dude Who Doesn’t Matter was just a con and he was the scruffy, scruffy mark, right? Like. Amita and Constance are in love.

3) Daphne and Nine-Ball are also in love, right? And Nine-Ball’s sister moves in with them and they systematically destroy every shitty dude in Hollywood.

[aimmyarrowshigh]

Also, I really need an Ocean’s Eight/Ghostbusters 2016 crossover. Thanks.