Nov 15, 2024
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tag as 0176. hello I'm very scared and very ashamed right now. When I was younger bout 17/18 (7 years ago) I read a fanfic. Now I never searched for this fix, just came across it, and clicked on it. I didn't realize what it was gonna be but when I opened it it turned out to be a sexual fix abt 2 fictional characters as kids. I remembering reading it but I can't remember what I thought about it and now I'm scared I liked it and just don't remember. I didn't save the fix (usually save the fics-
that I like) so I'm inclined to think I just didn't think anything of it and didn't really enjoy it. But I'm really worried I might have liked it or liked bits or something because I know I read the whole thing, and why would I read it all if I didn't like it? I have POCD so I'm really struggling with this and believe I might just be some freak. Pls help. 0176.
Hey lovely,
I’ve answered one of your former asks around two years ago and what I said back then still stands!
Sometimes you come across something and it isn’t something that you’d normally read. But you don’t know that before you start reading. Reading it doesn’t mean that you’re a bad person or anything like that. Finishing something also doesn’t mean that you liked it; I know that I will finish everything I start reading even though I really don’t like it. So that honestly doesn’t mean anything!
As you said, you tend to save the fics that you like. Now that means something. You didn’t save this fic, which is a very real ground to believe that you didn’t like it! And I know it doesn’t feel that way to you, but it was just reading something. Even if you did like it (which I don’t think you did), it wasn’t real and it doesn’t say anything about what you, as a person, like or desire. POCD can cause you to believe that it does, but it really doesn’t! That would be the same as the following situation; if I was gay and I was reading a book with a hetero relationship. If I looked that book, would that mean I wasn’t gay anymore? Sounds quite odd if you put it like that, right?
When struggling with intrusive thoughts, which can be a big part of OCD and which I think is what’s bothering you a lot with all this, this four step program can be very helpful. It helps you recognise and realise that these thoughts aren’t yours and that they don’t mean anything. It can help you be less affected by them, which most definitely is what you deserve! You might also want to check out our OCD page series, as there’s some helpful information and tools on there as well.
You’re not a freak. I really hope you can see my reasoning and work on letting this go. Because honestly, it makes me feel sad that this has been bothering you so much! You really deserve to be free of this worry. I know that can be really tough though, so it’s also completely okay if you need a little additional help for it. You can visit your GP / local doctor and explain to them briefly what’s been going on. They can arrange a referral to a therapist, counsellor, or other mental health professional. You can read more about getting help here. I hope this helped at least a little and let us know if there’s anything else we can do to help!
Sometimes what seems impossible, is just hard. Love Pauline
Most Beloved Wrestler Tournament
#0176
PAC
Mistico
0176 - Togetic
The Happiness Pokemon
Fairy - Flying
2' - Around the height of a Crocodile.
7.1 lbs - Around the weight of a Grass Trimmer.
From the Johto region.
Mainly male species.
Evolves from Togepi (0175), evolves into Togekiss (0468)
Can only evolve with a Shiny Stone.
Info:
It is said that Togetic will appear before kindhearted and caring people and shower them with happiness and good fortune.
Togetic grow dispirited if not with kind people.
Togetic do not need to flap their wings to stay in the air.
To spread happiness, Togetic sprinkles people with a glowing powder that people call "joy dust."
There are no records of Togetic being seen in the wild.
April 30 - Azania - iPhupho L'ka Biko
Azania by iPhupho L'ka Biko
Bandcamp / Youtube
One of my colleagues recommended this one to me, and he was worried that with it only being an EP that it wouldn't count. EP is still an album by my thinking, just slightly shorter.
Gorgeous album with phenomenal rhythms and textures from start to finish.
TT: Pick up sledgehammer.
> ==>
its rude to call your vegetarian alters "hamster ass bitch" btw.
