#04232022

[batshaped]

finally, truth in advertising

originally posted to twitter

[shelivesbetweenthepages]

babe's post birthday lunch ft. my vanity

[dubstepcarcommercial]

trans bisexual and neurodivergent really is the holy trinity

[dubstepcarcommercial]

why is my gf asleeeeeeeppppp ;-; yes we woke up at 6am this morning but y are they asleeeeep

[mortifiedandawesome]

Gonna get sliced at the men's pee party in the windy park!

[mortifiedandawesome]

Puffy Cloud Season!

[mortifiedandawesome]

Mother FUCK

So after washing off an inch of dirt off of my car since not doing anything to it since december probably, I was driving in the nice Sun and I realized since I didn't wipe it off I didn't want spots to just stay there.

So, as I was on the edge of town at noon on a Saturday I drive into this very large parking lot of a building that has not a soul in it

The area where I'm at is the convergence of two roads that lead to the highway some miles down the road both west and south. The only roads are semi paved heading out to the other highway

It's a nice warm day the wind is ferocious and I'm wiping off my windows.

As I begin to leave out of the exit I noticed the writing on the cement in that previous photograph I posted.

I think oh I'd better take a photo of that, and I begin to back up I pause for a minute to open my camera app as I am listening to my podcast.

Beepbeepbepp!Beepbeepbeepbeep!!!

What the FUCK!? I look behind me, is it the one person in this town who honks his horn at me like it is 1973 (I really do not enjoy horn honking outside of emergency situations)

I see some car I do not recognize it is not who I think it is although I briefly Wonder because they are prone to suddenly having a different car, but the honking speed is such that I know it is a stranger.

I'm like what the fuck!!? And a rare instance of me, since I have my windows open I yell "what the fuck are you doing behind me!?" So I drive forward again without taking the picture and turn onto the road in a circle so I can go back into the parking lot and take the picture.

Fucker gets onto the road, I turned North he turned South, the residential area is like half a mile down the road, there is absolutely no reason to have turned off the road to go into the parking lot and exit where I was!!!!

Mother FUCK

It is bad enough this happens to me every single step I take in a goddamn store, now it's happening in the wild!!??!!?!?

I swear to God I can't go directly to an item in a store I have to circle around 15 times until a fucking parade of people are done standing exactly where I need to be, and if by a miracle I get to go in front of the product I actually want to look at within a nanosecond somebody is up my ass because they need either the exact product or the one right below it.

It is fucking impossible to look at nutrition labels unless I snag the item quick go over by a damn meat cooler and look at it, and even then that's still a chance.

I have been in Walmart at 3:00 a.m. in December walked straight in just for bug spray and some dipshit had to come in and stop right next to me the nanosecond I got there.

God damn, I wish I had the perversion where you want people to be up your ass every 15 seconds!!!!!!!!

[mortifiedandawesome]

Ladies..