#13cupsofreblogs

[rydersworldbro]

I try my best to iron out the creases on the surface // I mould my face into what I’m told by society is something resembling happiness // inside I am a rapidly decomposing mess // heart on fire beating erratic in my chest // I smile for you even though I’m breaking // even though I’m not sure I can bear the weight I am taking // my feeble little shaking shoulders // what looks like rocks feels more like boulders // you don’t know how weak my knees can get when I feel these looming threats // why did I choose now to try and give up cigarettes? // I guess I’ll just drink coffee after coffee to keep it down // heavy is the head that’s about to drown // I must keep it in // I keep it in under this thin ageing skin // my veins pumping hard with unwanted adrenaline // but I’ll keep it in // all of the chaos that dwells within.

Just another anxious tailspin // ©️@rarasworldbro

[dirtysouthpawpoetry]

Visit Original Link

teacup13

there are people who leave

your heart full of heartbeats

& sentences that weigh more

than a tongue in purgatory,

yet my dreams have stalled

for a thimble to fill a cup of

blood & I can still time your

evaporation; if I dreamed

hard enough, it would be, if

I drew casts on the trees, they

would believe too - darling, in

the end we’re all just

stories

[imperialhaiku]

we came home from war / as the prophecy foretold. / to a home no more

haiku 283/365

[followcb]

Express It

leave it all here

verbs, words

spill your stories

pain, strain, glories

let it roll, let them go

tell them because they need to be told

do not hold

the dam, the avalanche, the twister,

the flood, the rush of blood back

express it, get poetic

that's that

FollowCB | Copyright July 27, 2018

[leftiswhatgodmademe]

Wolves do “Family” better than humans

"In some version of your existence, you'd have the strength to protect them all, alas, here we are, and this is not it." - Wolves know the truth about family

[rydersworldbro]

2am and it’s -2 degrees - my hands are numb. Winter has played most of its coldest cards by now, but I’m still so fucking afraid of the weather. I’m on the back porch thinking about how the last couple of months have transpired and led me onto this inevitable path I find myself walking... It all happened so suddenly and without me really realising it, or being fully conscious of the potential consequences. In retrospect it seems like somewhat of a hazy dream. I’ve finally chosen a direction instead of labouring in my own stagnation. It feels good to have an image in sight of the future, instead of the grey mass of amorphous cloud that I’m used to when I picture it in my minds eye. But fear keeps nibbling at me, I worry that as it takes shape with time I won’t be able to manage. Control seems easier when your standing still, isn’t that funny? I wasn’t controlling anything - everything was nothing, but it felt safe. I’m folding my brain into ugly origami because I keep creasing it the wrong way, the edges are beginning to fray. I can’t see into the future but I’m hoping it won’t fall in on me like a house of cards - all I ever want is stability; what if I’ve unwittingly entered a free fall? Is anything ever safe at all? Who would I call if it all crumbled down around me? There is no net at the bottom of life to catch me. I could end up like a rorschach splattered on the pavement, becoming one with the cement. Can I afford the rent? Maybe I don’t have to eat everyday? Who needs electricity anyway? I just want a place to call my own. I’ve got to do this, and do it alone. That’s the scariest part really. I have so many friendly faces around me encouraging my courage (that’s come far too late) but at the end of the day my trajectory is something I have to achieve solely. I have to rely only on me.

I’ve waited too long to finally feel free // this is something I wrote a couple of weeks ago... still resonating so I’m sharing it. ©️@rarasworldbro

[followcb]

The Story Of Our Lives

alone, together

together, when we're apart

disconnected yet connected

the story of us, from our start

I love you love me

differences exist between how we see

togetherness, intimacy

we're not a question of the heart

love is there, both of us care

there's never a question about time we share

yet we struggle, both somewhat dissatisfied

different desires, different lives

we're a balancing act upon high wires

we have it all, yet still we fall

into patterns, into usual habits

can't we learn to get out of our way

why no tolerance for what the other has to say

listening without prejudice

understanding, empathy

that's what we need, you and me

come together, weather stormy weather

see life through each other's eyes

seek to find...

where love empowers compromise

you and I

test of perseverance, testament to time

partly cloudy, partly sunny skies

twenty-nine years, the story of our lives

FollowCB | Copyright June 3, 2018

[rydersworldbro]

Brown bare branch silhouettes reach up towards the grey sky welcoming the rain pouring down, the roots beneath soaking up the moisture from the ground. The dewy grass dances softly with each drop that falls, the gods have finally heard nature’s calls. Cracks in the barren soil open wide and welcome the precipitation, a timely gift for a drought stricken nation. Some might think this is just a dreary grey winters day, but my sunburnt country sees this as a reprieve from decay.

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This is for @gracebabcockwrites who has been kind enough to help me out by contributing to my PayPal in the midst of a difficult time for me. Thank you so much!