#dc comics#dc#batman#bruce wayne#dick grayson#tim drake#dc fanart#batfamily#batfam
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Sometimes, we look at each other like we know each other, but talk like we don't. I don't understand this relationship.
Since I'm doing some venting on here right now. I think I should say something a little more positive. This one goes out to Marion :)
So Marion what can I say about this girl? Well I can say that we have a lot of good memories together, I'm not even sure if we have any bad ones to be honest. We never fight and can joke on each other without being insulted. Like how I joke on her giant ass and she calls me cracker and stuff. It's all great. I've known her since the end of 7th grade I think around 3rd quarter which is April-Mayish. This was back in 2007. We met on the school bus. I knew she was new but was kinda scared to talk to her, but then one day my friends were being ass's and didn't wanna let me sit with them on the bus so I asked if I could sit next to her and she said yeah. This girl everyday she'd read on the way home. Somehow we got to talking and I found out she was in my cluster in school. It took me forever to remember her name though haha. I felt so bad I'd always forget it and would call her something else that started with an M. I think it was Mari or something close to it, I don't know it was so long ago. But yeah at school I had this second life I guess you could say, because I lived out of district and the school had my old address so I could go there. It was a pain, I'd wake up at 5 or 6 every school morning then get the 7:10 city bus and take it across town to my school bus stop, usually I'd get there for 7:50-8ish. But yeah I had to keep where I lived a secret so I came up with this completely different Rickii. A Rickii whose father lived in France and who was from France and whose brother lived in New Mexico. She was the first friend that I made there that I just ended up telling my real story to. It was one night when we were on the phone and for some reason I decided to tell her the truth. She didn't care about the fact I didn't have a car or computer and was glad I told her. But I'm gonna fast forward a little here. Marion has always been someone I felt comfortable talking to about things. When I'm talking to her I know I don't have to tell her not to tell anyone because she just knows. She's really smart and is gonna go far in life. I'm so grateful that I've gotten the chance to know her so well and experience some amazing times together. Like in 8th grade on a field trip to the basketball hall of fame. I still have that picture of me, her, giau, and denisha :) Marion if you read this I love you girl, never change and I'll always have your back. And when you find a man that's worthy enough of you and that I approve of I better be one of your maids of honor =P I'm so proud of you and happy that you've come so far. Thankyou for being my best friend :)
MELISSA M. READ THIS if you want.... "We use to be so close......... now all this just made us farther apart :/"-Melissa
Anyone who isn't Melissa can read this, but all it basically is me talking about relationships with friends. So just warning you in advance.
Ugh "used to be" but I stopped telling you everything once you got so pissed at me talking about Bryan whose one of my best friends. You'd always criticize him and hate when I talk about him. But it wasn't it his fault for the way things happened. It was mine. I was overly clingy and controlling and emotional. I was the one who pushed him away and made him act the way he did. As days pass by I'm still starting to understand why he did things the way he did. I feel terrible looking back on it. Yeah I felt hurt but I wasn't the only one. It wasn't easy for him to push away one of his close friends like that, but it got to the point where he felt he had no choice. I became unbearable and if it wasn't for what happened and Malik giving me a reality check and everything else that's happened then I would have never felt this sense of understanding. I understand you felt bad he hurt me but when I would try and tell you it wasn't his fault you wouldn't hear it. You'd get mad whenever I would bring him up so I was able to tell you less and less things. The good and bad, all of the fun times, and that was a huge chunk of my life. You may hate him or have hated him but he's one of the reasons I'm even still around today. In the spring and beginning of summer I got really depressed and was reading these books. One was Thirteen Reasons Why. Bryan and Malik saw it and were afraid. They knew I had been depressed and would try and talk to me but I'd just shut them out. I feel so terrible looking back on it now. I put them both through so much. I had a lot of breakdowns in the course of those weeks, I even went wandering around in wet clothes after getting wet by a hose. It wasn't a good idea since I was ideal pray for a creep. Girl in short shorts, spaghetti strap tank and flip flops in hand. There ended up being this thunder storm that night and Bryan begged me to come back because it was dangerous. I was an idiot. But yeah I was overly clingy and needy and was basically on suicide watch by those 2 because of my behaviors and the book and the fact I carried pills with me. You say I could've talked to you, that you would have been there for me but the truth of the matter I couldn't. Part of the problem you didn't wanna even hear about and the other part was just too much to explain through text. I needed people who were around, who I saw almost everyday and knew me better than I knew myself, which is kinda scary but it's true! I highly doubt you've read up to this far CUZ if you have then good for you. None of this is your fault so stop pitying yourself and tell me off or something! You're a strong person! I may not tell everything to you but we've still had a lot of fun times together without me telling you everything, so why does that have to change now? Hmm? So what? Eat some chocolate! Punch a wall! Do something, anything EXCEPT PITY YOURSELF. Focus on the good things. Even before all of this happened we didn't talk that much. Me and Malik would randomly show up at your job and you'd come over sometimes but things have been weird lately so we haven't had the chance to.
My week has been fucking perfectttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt, my mom bought me Liliha Bakery coco puffsand we ate chip and dip today for lunch yahhhh
I love when you cannot, for the life of you, figure out how a friendship began.
Like one day you were strangers and the next you were the best of friends.
I really do love those.
I have never seen anyone as happy to see me as Rico was last night. So many emotions are flooding my body right now making it difficult to get anything in to words.
The feeling of being wanted is such a marvelous feeling that I don't really get to experience all that often, so last night, catching that vibe from somebody I haven't even seen in at least two years was incredible. I'm glad it wasn't as awkward as I thought it was going to be. It's like our friendship never ended, it was just on pause for a couple of years. There was a really strong bond between the two of us at one point in our lives, I cannot believe we ever let that go but I do suppose that things are better that way because it really gave us time to grow as human beings. The situation between us would definitely have been a lot better if we hadn't have been in the eighth grade and so incredibly immature at the time but there really isn't anything to do about that now.
I hope that seeing him at the show won't be our last encounter. Or if I get the opportunity to go see the band that Chris Skinner is in play on Tuesday and see Rico again, I hope that won't be the last of it. I would really love to just go hang out by the river and go get a pizza or something with Rico. It would be so nice to just sit down and do some catching up with out all of the things going on around us like at the show.
Experiences like that remind me so much of why having friends is awesome. I mean Tamara and Derrik were really the only REAL friends that I have even had. Even Rico was technically an acquaintance because we never hung out outside of school... except at Dakota's birthday party and we were both closer to naked than clothed so that was strange :D I just want people to think of me as a really awesome person to hang out with because I really am. It just takes time to get me out of the cage of shyness and most people don't care to stick around long enough to see that happen. Maybe some day I will be cool enough.
