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hua binan/shi mei text posts pt. 3 (pt. 1, pt. 2)

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𝐻𝑎𝑖𝑡𝑎𝑛𝑔

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shi mei 2ha and max blacksails would understand each other

#2ha tag #black sails

I know that some people say that meatbun involved the flower curse to give Mo Ran/ Taxian Jun a “cheap pass” but I definitely don’t think that’s right. In fact, I think she involved such a curse to give Chu Wanning a reason to forgive Mo Ran/Taxian Jun

Meatbun fully redeems Mo Ran and lets him fully and completely atone for his sins before she ever reveals the curse. She constantly includes cruel taxian jun scenes and continuously reminds us of the terrible crimes Mo Ran committed, she doesn’t gloss it over, or allows us to ‘forget’ about the extent of the cruelty, or excuses any of it as the curse for at least 70% of the novel. No, she fully portrays Mo Ran as a previously bad guy and makes him suffer for each and every single thing he did before fully redeeming him and allowing him to rest easy after heavy atonement.

If that’s the case, and since she was successful, why involve a curse? As a quick excuse? A way to undo all her previous hard work? To guarantee more readers forgiving him in case some still hated his guts? Well, I actually think it’s to give a reason for Chu Wanning’s (and the other characters’) forgiveness.

Before Chu Wanning 0.5 discovers that Taxian Jun is cursed, he absolutely hates him and detests him. Gone is all the love he had for him. He sees him torturing Xue Meng, his own brother, burning 70 cities, delighting in the misery of all those innocent people and then coming back to the palace to rape him and humiliate him no matter how much Chu Wanning begs him to stop. You can feel the anger and hatred and heartbreak that Chu Wanning starts to harbor for Taxian jun, you can see him loving Taxian jun less and less with every flashback that meatbun includes. Until he discovers the curse. And then it’s like the long forgotten fire of love within him is passionately reignited with hope. Suddenly his previous indifference and hatred turns to misery and sadness and forgiveness and “please forgive yourself” and “please stop before you can no longer stand yourself” and literally sacrificing himself for the other

Similarly, when present Chu Wanning first regains his previous life’s memories, he can’t stand to look at Mo Ran. He literally says, “if you knew that it was me who fed you the rice porridge when you were five, would you have been as cruel to me? Or would you have shown me some mercy?” And Chu Wanning had every right to be mad. You know, I was actually worried and nervous that meatbun would make Chu Wanning readily forgive mo ran when he regained his memories, I was worried that she was gonna dismiss and belittle all his trauma and the fact that he was a rape and abuse victim for the sake of ‘love’ (which ISNT realistic and is actually disgusting). But no, Chu Wanning WAS angry, he didn’t want to be anywhere near mo ran and it was fully understandable if he later on chose never to see him again (despite that being absolutely heartbreaking and tragic), or their relationship never being the same, or him being unable to stand mo ran’s touch. But then he discovers the curse, discovers that Taxian jun sacrificed his kindness for him, that everything was given away just for him, and he is devastated and heartbroken and, how can he still hate him? How can he still turn away from him? He was a victim but so was Taxian jun and it absolutely tears him apart.

This also applies for the rest of the characters such as Xue Meng, I mean if it wasn’t for the curse, why would he forgive Taxian Jun, who literally killed and murdered his own parents and family? All the characters, Xue Meng and Chu Wanning included, can forgive Mo Ran cause he DID atone and redeem himself and change for the better, sure, but since they were victim under his hands, they have every right never to want to interact with him ever again, much less reconcile their previous relationships with him, not because they don’t believe in his change but because they themselves suffered greatly because of him. But when they realize that he’s a victim just like them, that creates an opening, that creates a reason.

You say meatbun included the curse as a back door to all of Taxian Jun’s actions? I’ll do you one better and say, she created it to give the characters around mo ran a reason to forgive him and accept him again and take him back and rebuild their relationships with him, without disrespecting and disregarding abuse and rape victims and their trauma and having Chu Wanning unrealistically forgive mo ran easily.

In conclusion, meatbun is an absolute brilliant genius who literally put EVERYTHING into consideration

2Ha Thoughts.

I honestly applaud Chen Feiyu for taking on the role of Mo Ran. It's really hard to act out his character, so I said to myself that I wouldn't have any high expectations for the incoming live drama adaptation. Most people think that Feiyu will act out 3 versions of his character - Mo Ran 0.5, Mo Ran 1.0, and Mo Ran 2.0 - but for me, I like to think that there are 4 different ones.

SPOILERS AHEAD!! BE WARNED!!

First, he'll act out as the infamous Taxian-jun, who is a savage, bloodthirsty, and lustful mound. He is quick to anger and won't hesitate on killing anything that's on his path (except umm..of course, Chu Wanning hehe). This version is the evil form of his emotions, the one that the flower brought out, and twisted himself so hard that he would be horrified by the things he've done if he had any left sanity in him. (2Ha readers would, of course, know this as we experience his thoughts and emotions as he was reincarnated in his second life later on.) Everything this person did was on the image of his supposed lover, Shi Mei. He thought he dearly loved him so held everyone, most especially Chu Wanning, in contempt after Shi Mei passed away.

Second, he'll act out as Mo Weiyu. In this version, he is a disciple of Chu Wanning, the Yunheng Elder, and he is also a cultivator and an acquaintace to others, such as Ye Wangxi and Nangong Si. People see him as a person with filial respect (which WE know will be ironic since he fell in love with his shizun later on, for goodness' sake 😂) and average skills - he doesn't have a spiritual weapon yet, nor does he have good calligraphy or communication abilities. He is a hardheaded person, as we can see from his vehement denial on many things, including his affair with Rong Jiu. At this point, he is slowly "falling out of love" from Shi Mei and he begins his path towards redemption, looking for things and silver linings in every situation.

Third, he'll act out as Mo Ran, which subjectively, is the hardest role yet. Even I can't explain him this well because this version of his character is so complex. It can actually be divided into two parts. The first part: as a child, in his heart, he desperately craves and needs love. Mo Ran was the child that loved his mother, who named her as the first person that he liked the most in the world. He was the child who saw the hope and joy in everything despite all the pain and hurt that the world gave him. He was the kid that was beaten down to the dust, yet when he recived food from a stranger, he held the latter dearly in his heart, grateful for his blessings. He's the teen who entered Sisheng Peak, who immediately picked Chu Wanning because he said that he looks the gentlest and the most easy-going. He's the person who only had the purest love for Chu Wanning, and he's also the person who died just to protect him. (For me, this version of him died when he made Shi Mei take him instead of Chu Wanning. At that point he slowly became Taxian-jun, a puppet molded by Shi Mei.) And let's not deny it: just like how Mo Ran unknowingly loved Chu Wanning here, the latter also unknowingly loved him too. As of that point, they didn't "fall in love" with each other, but they were each other's light - they both gave each other the love they both deserved, so at most, they were each other's precious treasures.

The second part is on his next life. He is now known as the cousin of Xue Meng, the adopted nephew of Madam Wang & Xue Zhengming, the sect brothers of A-Mei and A-Meng, and the unruly disciple of Chu Wanning. At this point, he realizes that he may not have loved Shi Mei that deeply as he thought, but take note that he doesn't think that he is in love with his shizun yet. In the contrary, at this point, he is still adapting to his new circumstances, and he is learning new things as well as patching up misunderstandings. From his past life, his personality drastically changes, as shown from the immense change in spiritual weapons, from Bugui to Jiangui. This goes to show that even if they are the same person, he is a breaker that can lead himself to a different path. (Readers would also be giddy when they find out that Jiangui is similar to Tianwen, which symbolizes the deeply encased love he has. It also symbolizes that Mo Ran is an oblivious idiot periodt.)

Mo Ran is also the version who was conflicted by his own emotions. He is the person who begins to understand and notice some things, the person who finds out that his shizun was protecting not only him, but also everybody all along. It is he who sees Chu Wanning truly, and he notices that despite all the harsh wards and cold persona that the latter has, deep inside, he has a soft heart. It's he who notices everything that went wrong in his previous life, and he's also the person who's confused on his past actions. After Chu Wanning died, through Xue Meng drilling it into his brain, he found out that he was protecting him from the shadows, going as far by carrying him through more than three thousand steps to save him. (catch me crying in the corner I CAN'T WITH CHAPTER 97 HUHUHU) He's the person who regretted deeply.

Finally, the last version he'll act out is Mo-zongshi. This version started after the death of Chu Wanning, and also when he was about to go to the underworld. At that point, he saw all the instances where his shizun showed his love. He saw the wontons scene, in which he tried his best to assure his shizun that he doesn't need to be sorry, because on that specific day, the very reason why he was whipped, was because he stole that flower just for Chu Wanning, him. (btw all the symbolisms in this novel ARE INSANE like the flowers?? it could be for either the one mentioned or the ones Shi Mei planted. let's not mention the food: wontons, bowl of soup, bowl of congee, EVEN THE DAMN HOTPOT) He's the person who put back the pieces of the one he loves, brought him back to life, and waited five years for him.

He's a man in grief. He's a man in love.

While he waited for Chu Wanning to wake up, he now became the person that he very much wanted to be when he was younger: a hero. Now, he was Mo-zongshi, a famous cultivator known for his strength and bravery. He took on fights and got injured, but he never once stopped because he did it all for his shizun, to make him proud. Unconsciously, because of his yearning (CATCH ME CRYING AGAIN the quote?? "To yearn unwittingly breaks the willow branch." nOO), he copies Chu Wanning, down to his handwriting, his style of fighting, his outfit, and the way he looks. The person that's deeply in his heart is shown outside, so much that even Nangong Si mistakenly thought that he was Chu Wanning. Later, after Chu Wanning wakes up and after certain circumstances, he realizes that he was and still is in love with him all along, not Shi Mei.

At this point, Chu Wanning also falls in love with him. He saw the goodness in his heart, the strength and bravery he had, and the kindness he showed towards others. Aside from the bonus brownie points which is Mo Ran's looks (not blaming shizun, our husky is too good-looking!!), they now resolve their misunderstandings and their relationship turns deeper. When Mo-zongshi finally confesses...incoming fluff all around.

But like the Mo Ran version, his ending is way too sad. He deserves to know that it wasn't his fault that he turned out this way. It wasn't his fault that he turned out to be evil and hurt his lover. I know this, you know this, all readers know this, Chu Wanning knows it, but he doesn't, which is the most painful thing ever, because how much does it hurt for you to think that you abused the man you love in your past life? I was quite literally sobbing when he mentioned that Chu Wanning was his "God", his dragon, who had come to save him even if he felt like he didn't deserve it. He died, and he was the person who Chu Wanning mourned over, because it wasn't his fault, it never was.

(...i'm so empty inside...chapter 279...that chapter legit suffocated me due to my tears...)

But at the end, all those versions of him are, at core, the same. They may not show it similarly, but they are all strong on their beliefs, they are all stubborn and determined, they all love deeply and fiercely, immensely passionate and protective over the ones they love, and they are all a good person, if you look deeply into his heart.

Through Taxian-jun's dreams and his protection of his lover's corpse, through Mo Weiyu's determination on his redemption, through Mo Ran's regrets and understanding, and through Mo-zongshi's grief and love, it can be said that this character is one that you couldn't help but love. It's been so long, but his character really stood out to me from the many novels I read. This character is complex, with different versions of himself, but at the end of the day, it's still the person we love: our very own husky A-Ran.