#40daysuntil40

[soulcooljay]

The #birthday shenanigans start tonight! . The Art of the Turn Down w/ Salah The W Downtown . Tomorrow night is Kickin’ Up Dust W/ DJ Kemit @ The Sound Table . . . #40daysuntil40 #countdownto40 #JB #kickinupdust #artoftheturndown #salahananse #djkemit @thesoundtable @djkemit @salahananse @whotels (at Atlanta, Georgia) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bp-h33HlkiU/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=18ws7j5yx29qv

[soulcooljay]

#1dayuntil40 So, before this chapter closes, I reflect on the woman who brought me into this world and prepared me for this journey. I always joke with a friend about the term ‘Day 1’ because it’s rarely used to describe those who were there from literally day 1. Lena Bing is truly my Day 1 & my Day Forever. She was born in Oakland Park, FL and the youngest of 12 surviving siblings. She grew up on a migrant camp and had to pick vegetables & cotton growing up. She spent summers traveling to work in hotels in housekeeping to bring money home for the family. She lived in a home where they didn’t have enough utensils for everyone to eat, so they learned how to eat w/ their hands. When she was in her teens, she was part of the 1st group of Black students to integrate Richards Middle school. She had to fight w/ students who hated her because of her skin color. After her mom passed when she was 16/17, she was able to move into a new home, gain a new family and thrive. She got her associates degree. Then she had to raise a son on her own. . . She had to deal a son who didn’t have his father. A son with low self-esteem. A son who tried to run away from home. A son who was energetic and active. A son who got bored with school often. A son who questioned his existence. A son who was raw, closed off and isolated at times. A son who made mistakes. All of the amazing people in my life she introduced me to them and approved them. She made sure what she couldn’t teach me, she found someone that could. She played every role in my life that was needed for me to survive and grow. She made a dollar stretch to $10k just for me to experience all I could. She sacrificed a life she could’ve enjoyed to make my life memorable. . . We’ve done everything together. It’s been the 2 of us since Day 1. If God gave me the choice to do it over, I would choose her as my mother every single time. I am Lena’s Son. My life’s goal is to never fail her. I hope I make her proud. . . #40daysuntil40 #countdownto40 #lenasson #anthony #jamesanthony #bing #beanie #lena #justthe2ofus #lauderdale #blackmoms #blackmothers #ilovemymom (at Fort Lauderdale, Florida) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bp8b7RTF5vg/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=xuujgxr43qlf

[soulcooljay]

#2daysto40 This is my 2nd mom Mrs. Hester Polk, but everyone calls her Auntie. If I wasn’t with my mom, then there was a high probability that you would find me with Auntie. I went to her home every morning before school and I caught the bus to school from her house. She was a childcare specialist and had her own nursery and babysitting service. This is where I was in the summers before I started traveling to Baltimore. She taught me a whole lot. I remember as a child, she had a routine for every child she kept. She loved to watch TV. So she made us take a nap before Young & The Restless came on. We had lunch while The Price is Right, and we couldn’t wake up from our nap until Guiding Light came on. She potty trained me, and took care of me like I was her son. She made the best Cream of Wheat ever! She would let me play outside and go play basketball until the street light came on (do kids today have this kind of restriction?). She was waiting by the door too, she was not playing about being in before that street light came on. . . I remember when we used to have communion on 1st Sunday at church. When the ceremony was over, I would follow her back to the kitchen where I would drink the rest of the leftover communion drink (man, that Welch’s grape juice was so good 😋). I remember I had a wound and I needed to put rubbing alcohol on it so it could heal, but that felt like the worse pain ever. So she would put it on me and let me run the pain off and then come back to put some more on. I used her encyclopedia collection to do all of my book reports and research papers all through grammar school. She’s been at every important moment in my life. When my mom couldn’t be there, she was there. She raised me. She kept me. She loved me like I was her son, and in many ways I was her baby boy. She would pick me from school, church or band practice. She showed me what unconditional love was. I am not alive today without her in my life. She raised and cared for a lot of children, but I was her 1st and favorite. Love you Auntie... . . #40daysuntil40 #countdownto40 #anthony #auntie #melrosemanor #westwood #bing #beanie #jamesanthony #james #auntieraisedme #moms #lauderdale (at Oakland Park, Florida) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bp6U11CF6UO/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=ze07g3k7fn9x

[soulcooljay]

#3daysto40 This is the man who changed my like. He is Robert E. Evans Jr. He was the apostle @ Beth-el Temple Church of Christ. He was born in Manning, SC and moved to Baltimore when he was 5 yrs. old. He was accepted into the Peabody Conservatory of Music, and studied at the Bible and the Howard University School of Divinity in Washington, D.C. He was a teacher and Maryland state worker for the Income Tax Division before becoming a full time minister. I visited him every summer from age 11 until I started college. He taught me how to be a gentleman. He’s the one that taught me how to open doors. He disciplined me. He taught me how to serve and lead with service. He taught me how to be a man. He taught me how to give. He taught me how to value women. My approach to friendship is based on his life as a leader. He gave of himself immensely. He worked tirelessly, barely taking any time for himself. The demand for him was huge, but he never turned down anyone. People loved him so that they always referred to him as “my bishop”. They took ownership of him. He was an incredible man & human being. . . I remember my 1st semester of my freshman year @ FAMU. I’d gotten a letter that devastated me. It said a familial relationship I longed for never developed because of me and I had to initiate it for it to start. I harbored that hurt that entire semester. That Christmas I went to Bmore to see him. He sensed something was wrong and I told him of the letter. He pulled over, placed his hand on my head and began to pray. I broke down. I just cried for what seemed like an eternity. He helped me release that pain. He took care me. Bought school clothes for me, even got my tux for my prom. He shaped me. My granddad & uncle Oscar are who I pattern my movement after. Bishop Evans is who made me, who I try to live for and impressed. He’s the greatest man I’ve ever known. When people say Black men are no good, they never met him. All I am as a man is what he taught me to be. I wish he were here. I live to make him proud. He was the greatest. My dad. Love you Bishop forever. . . #40daysuntil40 #countdownto40 #beanie #anthony #james #bishopevans #roberteevansjr #bmore #baltimore (at Baltimore, Maryland) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bp3yOP1l6tf/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=14v4ll7a2z397

[soulcooljay]

#4daysuntil40 So this amazing woman is my 3rd mom, Mrs. Wahseeola Evans. You see that fur coat don’t you? She was always styling. She is the first lady of the late Apostle Robert Evans, and she was a powerful woman of God in her own right. During all of my teenage years, I used to go to Baltimore every summer and spend the whole summer there. So, while I was there, she stood in and watched over me like a mom. She was a mother to a few young men and women. When I think back, she did a lot of heavy lifting. To work for The Baltimore Parks & Recreation department, running a home & helping build a ministry and support a rising leader in the Christian world was a lot to handle. Yet, she still made sure her summer kids were taken care of. She was a tough soldier. She had a strong personality and she demanded excellence and you carry yourself a certain way. She kept you in line. I remember she didn’t like for you to bring in too many grocery bags in at once. She loved order and for things to be right. That’s what I took from her the most. She taught me to be strong in your convictions and to carry yourself in the most upstanding way. . . I still remember when she introduced me to cream chipped beef. It was a dish I’d never heard of before, but she made it for us for breakfast. I thought it was the best thing since shell toe addidas’. That dish summarizes her and our relationship. She was a caretaker, faithful in her commitments, and a woman of her word. Yet, she was humble and knew where she came from and that never left her. She was strong, educated and sophisticated when she needed to be. She also loved the simple joys of being around family, being loved and adored, laughing and sharing moments with those close to her. She was the embodiment of what an example should be. She believed in living her words and not just saying them. She knew people were watching her, and she knew who, what and whom she represented. She taught me through her walk about what it meant to be an example for others. I’ve never forgotten that lesson. Love you Mom Wahsee... . . #40daysuntil40 #countdownto40 #beanie #james #anthony #bing #jb #jamesanthony #soulcooljay #bmore #randalstown (at Baltimore, Maryland) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bp1DNt-Fvsh/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1aigma6n4559j

[soulcooljay]

#5daysto40 So, anyone who knows me intimately knows that I lay claim to having 4 moms. Momma Lena is a birth mom who raised me, taught me, fed me, clothe me and did everything for me. Yet, I’ve had 3 women in my life who’ve mothered me in certain points in life and watched over me like I was their own son. This is my 4th mom, my college mom Ms. Benita Lamb. She was an office manager for Student Activities on FAMU’s campus while I was there. She was part of a 2-woman tandem that ran Student Activities and helped SGA do some amazing things. She was apart of the backbone of the machine that put all of the SGA funded activities on. All the travel for SGA, PA’s & The Court they handled. The BeOutDay’s, Crab Boils, special speakers, homecomings, there was the students put on that they wasn’t behind. She was behind the students, always encouraging us to fight for what we wanted. Even when we were fighting for voting rights, marching for disenfranchisement or the law school, she was behind us. She became a mom to me on The Hill. She was on top of me about my course work, always looked out for me and took care of me. She even stayed in touch with my mom to help her keep me in check. . . I remember one Thanksgiving holiday I didn’t have a ride home. I had no way or means to get back home that Thanksgiving. So she invited me to her home that Thanksgiving to be with her family. It’s 1 of the most memorable Thanksgivings of my life. She sent me home with food and checked on me after. I was with her family the whole day. It was like I was one of the family. I remember when I got sick in college she bought the medicine for me to take. She even fed me at times when I might have been struggling as a college student. She was truly a mother to me. I would not have made it through and out of FAMU without her. My FAMU experience wouldn’t be great without her. She was a mother figure to her fair share of students. Love you dearly Ms. Lamb . . #40daysuntil40 #countdownto40 #JB #james #bing #anthony #beanie #lilanthony #jamie #bingbing #FAMU #SGA #famurattlers (at Tallahassee, Florida) https://www.instagram.com/p/BpycRwQFziQ/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=nonk0dddaju5

[soulcooljay]

#7daysto40 So that’s me standing in the chair, apparently about to sing happy birthday to me or blow out the candles. The little girl with the hat is my Aunt Suretta. This photo is about one of the most important Black women in my life, Mother Francis. Her was Myrtle Francis, and she was an entrepreneur and pioneer in Fort Lauderdale. Born in South Carolina, she was an ordained minister at the age of 18. She moved her family to Florida and founded Universal Pentecostal Church where she was the Head Pastor. Despite women being told they couldn’t pastor or lead a church, she was doing it in the 1950’s. She also was a DJ on WRBD for 15 years & was their religious broadcast director and gospel DJ. She was a landlord, had her own Hands of Friendship foundation and more. The title as “Mother” wasn’t just a nickname either. She was a temporary foster mom as well as adopting several children and raising them. . . True story. I was a scrawny little kid. So every time Mother needed help to get up from the couch, she’d call me to come her up. I used to struggle badly. You’d think I was trying to lift a building. She would just laugh and giggle at me trying to help her up lol. I was her Anthony, her little grandbaby. I used to run to her every time I saw her. . . Mother was the quintessential definition of a strong Black women. I’ve been asked whether I have an issue dealing w/ strong Black women. Well, those are the only women I’ve ever dealt with. She’s the last matriarch of what Black women are. The most amazing thing about Mother was how she loved & invested in Black men. She never used or weaponized her strength or success against Black men. She’d pray for, teach, invest & help them no matter what. She’s one of the major reasons I am forever indebted to and in love with Black women. She was amazing. Love you Mother. . . #40daysuntil40 #countdownto40 #anthony #motherfrancis #james #bing #beanie #jb #soulcooljay #iloveblackwomen #blackgirlmagic #strongblackwoman #blackmatriarch #jamesanthony (at Lauderhill, Florida) https://www.instagram.com/p/BptK9sBlsA8/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1jgmc3ypgdnar

[soulcooljay]

#10daysto40 So... remember when I talked the time my high school art teacher encouraged me to try out and model? Well, this is the impromptu photo shoot we had near the cafeteria and band room area to submit for the competition. I guess you can say this is my 1st comp card. I remember I had no clue she was going to do this. I didn’t try and dress for anything that day except for a normal day at school. She saw me walking in the hallway and told me to come by after one of my classes. Ms. V was the photographer with a decent camera. This was me at 16 trying to do serious poses and smiles like I was a serious model lol. I didn’t have a haircut at all, I wasn’t prepared at all to do any kind of real or semi-pro photo shoot. Man, these pictures would never have flown in this era. They probably wouldn’t have given me a second in today’s climate. . It’s crazy, I remember how bad I wanted to grow a beard back then. I was trying to be an adult way before my time. I’m kinda hairy, so I could grow my facial pretty early. The problem is my beard could never connect. Regardless of how I tried to so-call shave in the area to make the hair grow, it never worked. Yet, when I went to my barber Daniel at the time, I remember him telling me that he was never shape a full beard for me then. He said I was too young to wear a beard like a grown man. You know what, he was right. I was too young. I appreciate Daniel and the OG’s back then for not being afraid to tell a lil man when to slow down. You think you want to be grown until those responsibilities, bills and consequences hit you. Then you start wishing you were a kid again. Thank you Ms. V for believing in me, and thanks Daniel for checking me and keeping this kid a kid... . . . #40daysuntil40 #countdownto40 #model #modelsearch #anthony #james #bjng #beanie #jb #bingbing #soulcooljay #jay #mrsmellgood #jamie #lauderdale #davie #floridaboy #vintage (at Davie, Florida) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bplb6V1D17B/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=6tl0fjdkeqzl