This is me at 41.
I’ve never had any Botox or filler partly because of fear and partly because with every year, I look a little bit more like my mother in the mirror, and I love that.
I’ve never colored my hair.
I attribute that to having a childlike-exuberant spirit about 38 years younger than my body is today.
Don’t worry.
I also found my first gray hair last month - which a few of my oldest friends in Texas will appreciate.
I sometimes use photo filters - I call it “Photox,” (😂) but I never filter my words or my heart.💗
I’ve used @LaMer since I was 20 years old, working in Neiman Marcus, even when my bank account had no business buying it.
I work out more now than I ever have in my life.
I drink wine every day.
I take a bubble bath every night
I kiss the man I love every day and night.
I thank God for all three of those things every single day.
I have books to write that I still need to finish.
And, I have books I’ve written that I haven’t had the courage - or, time - to send to publishers.
And, while I sometimes struggle with early morning anxiety - that sometimes wakes me up in a panic - once my nerves settle, every single morning, I get excited for the day in front of me and what’s up ahead.
I worry that I don’t make enough time for my friends due to my hectic schedule.
I worry that I spend too much time worrying.
I get to travel.
I get to play pretend for work.
I get to curate and host parties as part of my “paying job.”
The most common word I use is “excited.”
And, the word I never use is “bored.”
I get to meet hundreds of people every week and hug them and laugh with them and cry with them and get to know them in a way I never would have the opportunity to if I didn’t do exactly what it is that I do.
And, all I can think is how one little seed of a dream can grow into one big, perfectly imperfect life...and, how at 41, I finally look in the mirror and, smile at myself - sometimes even laughing - rather than decimating myself the way I used to.
Because at 41, I have come to know who I am, love who I am, and accept all of those “flaws” as gifts that make me different from anyone else on this planet.
And, I’ve always liked being different.☺️
📷: Nick Yedinak at The Ritz-Carlton Bacara, Santa Barbara — at The Ritz-Carlton Bacara, Santa Barbara.