Oct 3, 2024
“ Our entire life - consists ultimately in accepting ourselves as we are. ” ― Jean Anouilh
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“ Our entire life - consists ultimately in accepting ourselves as we are. ” ― Jean Anouilh
MY HALF OF THE TIDE
Richard Attfield , a minimally speaking autistic man who uses facilitated communication and a Lightwriter , writes about his communication journey , the ache to communicate like others and learning how to use verbal speech as an adult.
The day finally came, however, when I realized I had to join in the conversation as myself - no digital voice to do it for me. After all I am British, not American, and my good old English accent needs to be heard in this country as far as freedom of speech goes — from a person with autism and limited speech that is! So I finally decided that I was going to try once again to communicate through speech. I must admit I was rather like a cat on a hot tin roof — aggravated beyond belief — trying to get myself out of the situation that I found myself in, of wanting to join in a conversation but having so much difficulty still. So last September I decided to try to talk a few sentences each day. As a person that had never held a conversation in his entire life, attempting to do so was an overwhelming experience. The end result was not a happy one because eventually I felt I had failed again, although in fact I did manage a few sentences that came out rather well. The final crunch came, however, the day the sound/tone of my voice registered with me. It sounded odd even to my own ears! It scared the hell out of me to hear my own voice talking in sentences, I can tell you! As I mentioned to Doug at the time, I felt like I was dragging myself up the side of a mountain. It was a tiny little voice I heard, clear cut, sharp even, but not good enough for me — that is what I told myself (fine excuse). Here I was a tall six foot hunk — I did not want a tiny little voice coming out of my huge frame.
When i do actually try to speak the words as I type, I feel so sure of my own identity that I can hold on to it for hours afterwards. I feel so sure of who I am. I fill up with joy inside that I can hear myself speaking and I tell myself that I am the same as other people and not some inferior being, even if it is only for a few minutes. I feel so excited by the whole thing of being myself and joining in the conversation verbally for a short time but then afterwards I feel so hurt again by the feeling of defeat that comes over me because in reality I know I am not the same as other people. Then I go through the sheer hell of denying all I am again because I feel so bad but then I glance up into my Mother's face and see her dogged determination and I fight the anxiety that I feel, I fight the urge to give up trying, I fight the urge to go back to my own room and hide from people because I know deep down inside I want to be myself through and through.
Judging others By judging others either positively or negatively we are actually saying something about ourselves and how we are different from everyone else. This created sense of separateness (ego-building) is one of the fundamental causes of our suffering and keeps us from the peace that we might find in accepting others for who they are, and, in turn, accepting ourselves. — galeyman
To love is, first of all, to accept ourselves as we actually are.
Thich Nhat Hanh
Sometimes I hear people use the phrase "being present" like it is an elusive thing, one more additional thing in life that they need to get perfect at that they are not doing. The feeling surrounding it is similar to not eating your vegetables. So for education and counseling purposes, it's time to address it head on (get it??? because our heads?? and mental health?). Being mindful or present is a simple thing, but it might not be a natural thing. It is being where you are, in your body. Noticing what is happening only, not what might happen. Without realizing it, we often get in this state of presence when we are engulfed in an activity, feel happy, or we're doing something new. We are all capable of being present. So WHY oh WHY don't our minds let us get there all the other times?
Fortune Cookie Friday: How to Gain Some Confidence
Wish you had more #confidence? Learn how to gain some without the help of a genie. #fortunecookie
I love the animated movie Aladdin (1992). There are so many life lessons in the film: be honest to ourselves and others, society does not define who we are, be careful what we wish for, and all that matters is who we are on the inside. Practicing these ideas make us better and more confident. In the movie, Aladdin learns these lessons with the help of Genie, Abu (his monkey accomplice), and the…
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Ep 0144 – Getting Over Hard Times and My Reaction to Oprah
Here I am ready to have a little chat with myself down at the podcast rock. Podcast Recap I let go of assuming good things are always hard, share snippets and comments from BCs Dawny, Amy from WI, Josephine and Stéfanie from Quebec. I ponder my take on Oprah Winfrey’s oft-quoted comment about acceptance of herself when over 200 lbs. I read an excerpt from my blog post about the spaced out time…
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Is there anything we shouldn't change? Yes, there is.
Is there anything we shouldn’t change? Yes, there is.
I’ve been writing about change this week. But before I go on, a conversation I had tonight with a young woman prompts me to write this as well.
When we’re talking about change, especially as Christians, I want to make it clear that we are NOT talking about changing one’s personality.
That’s not the change I am referring to. We are all born with unique personalities.
The definition of personality…
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