Are You A Cactus, A Clinger Or A Babe Magnet?
Over the years I’ve spent alooooot of time learning attachment theory to help myself in my own relationships and for my clients
So I want to share with you 3 concepts that may be making, or breaking your connections with women...
and how to let go of them, so you can connect & relate with women fearlessly (and just be happy in yourself).
The cactus has been burnt too many times — so you use defensive language to push away ANY softness or good vibes towards you (or you meet it with suspicion).
You’ve disowned that part of yourself because you’ve either been told it’s weak, you’re weak…
or because you’ve stuck your neck out before, and had your head chopped off.
Deep down inside you crave connection.
But you use bravado, ‘don’t need no woman’ lines and have disconnected sex to protect yourself from feeling the feels.
Cactus men clash with cactus women (and vice versa)… and both attract (or create) clingers (sometimes even in each other).
Both sides can’t tolerate weakness in others, so in relationships, they bully and abuse the partner — because that partner is mirroring back to them their own weaknesses (it also makes them cling harder which the cactus can’t stand).
If you have cactus tendencies, just know it’s defensiveness borne from fear…
based on the false belief that you think it’s protecting you.
The belief you think you need to defend yourself against other people (women in this case) is the problem.
It’s exhausting, painful and will repel women — because it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.
The clinger is obvs the opposite.
Borne from abandonment issues and a need to be liked, the clinger gets overcome with anxiety at the threat of someone leaving them.
The clinger may have PTSD that’s gone unchecked and unhealed.
So you project those fears onto women and try to corner them into giving you the validation you desperately need (by love bombing them)…
If you’re a clinger, your #1 focus right now should be on healing your inner wounds.
You don’t have to live in constant fear of rejection… and healthier relationships are available to you.
Provided you do the inner work to get there.
QUICK NOTE: We all fall into both camps at different times. Often the cactus is that way because they’re terrified of their clinger tendencies. So it’s safer to act with bravado (but lonely as hell).
Just as much as the clinger is terrified of their cactus tendencies, they avoid confrontation at all costs.
In any case, they’re both imbalanced & create unhealthy dynamics which, if unchecked, will keep creating more of the same.
This is the healed version of you.
You’ve made peace with your past, accepted how you’ve affected others and accepted yourself.
You understand that in order to be happy, it’s your job to work on yourself and not rely on a woman to do it.
You live in a vibe of love & acceptance — which makes you happy, easy to love and confident in who you are.
And the key difference in all of them?
The first 2 are driven by fear.
The 3rd is driven by love.
When you simply let go of fear…
you naturally step into a space of love.
If you want powerful connections with women… and ultimately find the right one for you… I’ve created the Man Aligned 40 Day Transformation.
Every day for 40 days you get lessons & Attraction Attunement Activities to turn you into a total babe magnet — who can connect with any woman he wants.
Trust your own ability to meet, attract & date great quality women (from an aligned place in yourself)
Use who you already are to make connection ‘just happen’ (leaving her blown away by how ‘different’ you are to all the other guys)
Let go of limiting beliefs around women & relationships (so building a relationship feels natural & easy)
Be intentional about what you want… and how you get it (by using ‘methods’ to create a quality dating pool)
Build relationships with women with healthy, loving detachment (so you can be solid & stable in yourself)
Connect to your heart, so you can connect to hers (by being present in the moment)
Click here for all the info
