The Foxes as Things I Do When My Housemates Aren’t Home
Dan: Full-effort dance to k-pop/rap songs as I wash the dishes and pretend my neighbors across the street can’t see me through the front window.
Kevin: Work out, so my housemates won’t hear me grunting while I do pushups.
Andrew: Blast “No Scrubs” by TLC at full volume in the bathroom and sing and dance in front of the mirror.
Matt: Belt every one of Annabeth’s soprano parts in The Lightning Thief musical without warming up my voice at all, and jump down to tenor range / chest voice any time anyone else’s part comes on.
Aaron: Spend hours explaining to myself out loud how to do every problem in my chem labs / math / physics homework.
Seth: Think about how if I took a large amount of my seizure meds at once, it would induce a seizure and I wouldn’t have to do my homework or go to class.
Allison: Call my best friend to rant about how uncomfy the housemate whose room is right next to mine makes me (dont worry, she has since been exiled from the colony and replaced by an incredible human bean).
Nicky: Look at art on tumbr/insta and audibly gasp and whisper “I’m so gay” to myself everytime I see beautiful art of a beautiful boy.
Renee: Cook enormous batches of soup because nobody is there to be mad that I’m using both the pots, and within the hour eat approximately a half gallon of said soup straight out of one of the pots.
Neil: Ponder, research, and make plans to test whether I can use fingernail shavings to form a gelatin-like substance, and consider whether I, as a vegan, would eat foods made with my own fingernail shaving gelatin.