Chapter 8: Hello Roen, I'm just stopping by to find out if you're having a nice holiday
[G-slur] looked unusual as a human. She was wearing a fitted suit with a skirt that went down to her knees. She looked quite like a businessperson.
Do these Gevirian leaders have nothing better to do? Imagine if the Prime Minister kept popping up in US cities to torment their adoptive son and their adoptive son's super platonic friend.
G-slur grins, seemingly thrilled that Roen is having a terrible time.
If she knew what had just happened, her turning up was sick.
Unintentionally hilarious sentence.
G-slur starts mocking Roen's relapse into alcoholism, which is lovely. In response, Roen says:
“Did you get your little killer to tell you where I was?”
Hold up. If Roen thinks she sent Crega, surely he must think G-slur knows what happened to him? Why did I word that totally sick sentence like that?
Regardless, G-slur seems to have no idea what he's on about. Roen argues with her, explaining what just happened, and she thinks he's either making it up or drunkenly hallucinated the whole thing. Because of this, she refuses to engage, and instead asks Roen why he's in El Paso.
...
YOU GAVE HIM THE PASSPORT. Why the hell would you do that if you didn't want him to use it?
Presumably someone is following them, because Shafinah told Layane they're being tracked, but I don't think it's Crega. All I know about this mystery stalker – assuming they've been following Layane and Roen this whole time and weren't able to tell G-slur why the dynamic duo came to El Paso – is they're godawful at their job.
Roen lies and says he's here on holiday. I do love that one of Roen's defining character traits is how terrible he is at lying. Luckily for Roen, G-slur decides she doesn't care if he's lying or not, for some reason. She's here to tell him something, unrelated to why Roen decided to go on holiday to Texas of all places.
“We have heard that a body was found,” she said. “The body of a young male Gever. We do not yet have proof, but all Gever on the surface are being questioned.”
Roen has remarkably little reaction to this, considering he was kidnapped and almost murdered at the end of book one. I'd ask if G-slur thinks this is anything to do with those bad guys, or maybe even the quad-wielding Gever who attacked me less than ten minutes ago. Instead:
He saw where it was going; she thought he could have let someone out. What an absurd thought it was. He hardly knew anyone in Geviria, bar servants and other members of G-slur’s household. He simply wasn’t allowed to know anyone. If he had let anyone out, it would have been a stranger.
G-slur: we've found the body of a dead Gever.
Roen, who has been kidnapped once, almost killed twice, and knows Shafinah is up to something:
Maybe Crega hit Roen harder than I thought.
Roen, for some reason, tells G-slur he didn't let the dead Gever out of Geviria. Unprompted. If I was G-slur, that's what would convince me Roen was involved, but never mind.
“And even if I wanted to, I couldn’t now.” [Roen said]
When two of the kidnappers removed the diamond piercings from his skin, they were taking away more than simple body-jewellery. It was the reason that – according to Layane – Winchester killed the men who stole and sold the jewels. It cost him his entrance to Geviria.
So I did remember this happened. If you're thinking, oh, maybe Roen is going to realise it could be someone who stole/tracked down/bought the diamonds who did this, you would be completely wrong.
G-slur tells drunk, beaten Roen that she didn't think he had anything to do with it. Not in a but I do now way, she genuinely doesn't react at all to how suspicious Roen is acting. Instead, she believes the Gever may have been born on the surface. She gives no evidence for this whatsoever, but the reason she wanted to speak to Roen is to warn him that Elint might not be around for a while, seeing as all Gever working in the outside world, and who are old enough to be the corpse's parent, are being questioned about this in Geviria.
Fucking hell. She came all this way for that? I know she can teleport, but she doesn't even like Roen! Why would she come here just to give him a heads up that his buddy might not be able to let him into Geviria for a few days? I hope to god she's doing something evil in El Paso that hasn't been revealed yet, or it makes no sense whatsoever that she's here. And as well as not making sense for G-slur's character (yes she likes to torment Roen, but this is maybe the first time she's left Geviria in over a decade!*), this scene reveals exactly NOTHING that we don't already know, or that couldn't have been mentioned by Shafinah.
* Assuming she is indeed the one who filled Layane's parent's house with water, I honestly can't remember if that was ever confirmed.
“Fine,” said Roen. “I still want you to call off Crega. He killed someone.”
G-slur laughed. “I honestly have no idea what you are talking about, Roenakah.”
They bicker for a while about whether or not what happened to Roen really happened. It ends with Roen telling G-slur fine, if she didn't send Crega, she needs to find out who did because that guy is dangerous. I love that he's appealing to G-slur for help here, as though he's forgotten she's evil and hates him.
The fact Crega only attacked Roen after Roen attacked him first does not come up.
G-slur still doesn't believe Roen, so he tries to bring her into the alleyway to... see the crime scene?
Come to think of it, where are they having this conversation? There's been no grounding at all, but I can only assume this drunk, beaten man and businesswoman, who presumably both have vaguely European accents, have been having this entire conversation in public on a busy street, near to where the cops have been called to a murder scene.
Wait a second. English isn't these characters' first language! Why are they having this conversation in English? Whenever characters speak in Gevirian I italicise it. Did I forget to do that?
They reach the alley/crime scene and Roen points at the crowd and cops and tells G-slur this is proof of what he saw. Except... is it, Roen? All she'll see is some human nonsense.
“I don’t know what you saw,” [G-slur] said, “but we are the only Gever here. Trust me.”
“Maybe... maybe he’s connected to the dead Gever, then!”
FUCKING FINALLY. I honestly thought we were about to get through this whole chapter without one sensible thought.
Unfortunately, G-slur still thinks he drunkenly hallucinated Crega. Then they switch to speaking Gevirian, which means I didn't forget about that, and they just decided to have that entire previous conversation in English. In public. Yeah.
“Why aren’t you trying to kill me again for being here? Or for arguing with you? Or fo...?” [Roen said]
“Shut up. I am leaving you be because your actions mean very little to me at the moment, and I have my own things to deal with. If you want to stay here and get drunk, that’s fine. But don’t drag me into anything that’s going on.”
Drag you into... girl, you came here unprompted to hassle Roen! If you have your own things to deal with, why come here? And why arrange to get Roen a new passport if you're so busy? Wouldn't it have been easier for you if he was stuck in Geviria?
Roen gives one last ditch attempt to convince her that Crega is real, but she teleports away. That's pretty funny, I'll give myself that.
He kicked the air where she had stood, as if somehow the blow would reach her. She had come to see him for no reason but to anger him.
Finally, Roen has an emotional reaction to what happened. G-slur might be lying to him, and Crega could still be out there with all four of his guns. Maybe even following Roen and Layane! What're you gonna do about it, Roen?
If you guessed, 'down the rest of his vodka', you'd be exactly correct.
Hi Sam! I just wanted to thank you for tagging your cocktail posts with "alcohol". It's a small thing but not a lot of people seem to remember that tag and as someone with an alcohol abuse problem it really means a lot to me that you've been so consistent with it with your recent posts. So thanks again, and thanks for all the wonderful stories you've written and shared with us too!
I do my best! I try to be consistent about tagging, although I don't know how well I succeed overall. The ones I try to be super conscientious about are food, intoxicants, and anything where I'm conscious I'm yammering about one specific interest that others may not have the passing obsession with that I do.
It sounds like you're in a pretty good place with regards to the problem (at least I hope!) and I'm glad I can help to keep you there. Addiction/misuse/abuse is a truly messy, misunderstood issue, and if I can't actually do much to help at least I try not to make it worse. Having quit smoking (nine years next Halloween!) I know how much damage simple exposure can do in terms of re-igniting cravings.
I do like how my approach to chapters can be summarised as:
DRAFT 1 - chapters that are pretty long
DRAFT 2 - new chapter every time a character blinks!
DRAFT 3 - chapters that are WAY too long
We open in media res.
“I have to swim?”
“Well, we can’t take the boat too close to the island, I don’t think it’d survive the collision,” Elint said, laughing.
I like how I've realised that a tiny, unmarked island in the middle of the ocean presents logistical difficulties, but I haven't realised hard enough to do anything about it.
It's the early hours of the morning (exactly ten to three, if you're interested). Apparently Elint woke Layane up to tell her they needed to go, so she got up and ran into the shower before he could say, "Hold up, you're about to go for a dip in the ocean!"
She then returned to find him putting her belongings into plastic bags.
I have no idea why I didn't open with Layane about to swim, nor why Elint didn't try to stop her, nor why she didn't just ask what the plan was.
Also, didn't she have a crazy long shower before she went to bed?
When [Elint] finished bagging up Roen’s things, he walked over to him and shook him. He groaned, and slowly sat himself up. “Time to go?” he said, yawning. At least he looks sober, Layane thought, sighing.
I also have no idea why Elint didn't wake Layane and Roen at the same time. Maybe he somehow foresaw Layane's weird shower thing?
Roen rubbed his eyes and stood up.”You’re not coming, are you?” he said, addressing Elint.
“No. But G-slur already knows everything. A message was sent ahead, we thought she would act kinder if she knew what had happened before seeing you.” Elint looked over at Roen, who looked shocked. “The message does not blame anyone for what happened, it simply states what did happen, and that Layane is turning up.”
Uh.
Don't worry Roen, it's okay, we just told G-slur that Layane and Clemant were kidnapped under your watch, not that you were at fault!
I guess Roen isn't at fault for the same reason Elint wasn't at fault for telling Roen to go off on an eleven month jolly and then repeatedly lying to HQ about it.
(I'm still unclear on what exactly happened there.)
“I am really going to die,” Roen said, lifting one of the plastic bags. “I hope I get a painless execution.”
At least Roen sees how serious this is.
Elint laughed a little, but his expression was serious. “She won’t kill you,” he said. “Your death would anger too many people.”
“That’s good to know,” said Roen. Layane stifled a laugh.
His death would anger soooo many people, but G-slur sent him out into the world at fourteen, so unprepared he nearly died of hypothermia, and has let him drink himself to death repeatedly since then.
I guess G-slur could argue that Roen drinking himself to death is slightly different from her pulling the trigger, but it's still a hell of a choice.
Anyway, there was literally no reason for this entire section to be included, so the chapter opened with 500 words of nothing.
They head outside with the bags. It's five a.m. somehow, which according to the timestamps means their short conversation lasted over two hours. It's raining heavily when they reach the deck.
I'm don't know much about cruises, but feel there must be a less conspicuous way to secretly disembark than jumping off the deck. And, you know, a safer way. I know the Gever can fly, but Layane certainly can't.
Maybe Elint will fly her down?
Elint turned to Layane. “It looks further away from up here,” he said. “It’s a lousy day but you’ll be fine. Remember to land feet-first. I’ll save you if you get stuck.
Maybe not.
I'm pretty sure Layane could very easily die doing this. It's freezing. She had swimming lessons years ago, according to the narration, but she's never swam outdoors.
Elint is clearly meant to be a kind, paternal figure, but... he's kind of a dick, right?
Elint did defend Roen to G-slur, tried to get G-slur to replace Roen as Protector after he almost died, and gave Roen a bunch of money to swan off into the sunset, yeah, yeah.
But... Roen has been a Protector for years. Elint seemingly enabled and covered up Roen's issues all that time, and now he's thrown Roen to G-slur's mercy and is acting like nothing is wrong.
Also, he fully admitted that he assumed Roen would die in Spain.
Layane treats Elint as an authority figure that she can go to for help, but I have no idea why. When Layane came to him for answers, Elint spent several pages defending Roen's (and his own) actions before anything else. He dismisses Layane's concerns and acts like Roen's tragic backstory absolves him of blame. He could probably accompany Layane and Roen to Geviria, but chooses not to, essentially leaving Layane alone with the dude who's been stalking her for years and who got her sister kidnapped.
If this is the only other option, I'd try my luck with the police.
The below continues directly from the last dialogue I shared:
"(...) Just hold onto Roen or something.”
Disgusted by that idea, Layane decided that the [swimming] lessons would come in useful after all.
You're the adult here, Elint! Why don't you fly her down?
And why are you pushing her towards Roen this hard? You spent pages and pages in the last chapter trying to convince Layane she shouldn't hate him, made them sleep in the same room, and now you're telling her to 'hold onto him' in dangerous situations? Are you acting as his wingman?
(Pun intended.)
They strap their bags to their backs and Roen climbs onto the railing. Layane asks Roen if he's going to fly down, to which he responds no, because he has the bag it would be easier to swim.
Okay. Surely gliding down with the bag in your many arms would be way easier than dropping down into the ocean and then swimming? This chapter has me questioning more stuff than most of the other chapters combined.
Without responding to Roen, Layane climbs onto the railing next to him. The water looks very far away, and she hesitates.
“You’ll have to get off soon,” said Elint, who had returned to the railing to look at the island. “It’s not as bad as it looks, really. Once I broke my wing and I had to drop down, it wasn’t bad.”
Be honest, Elint, is this some creepy wingman shit? Are you trying to do the fear-is-an-aphrodisiac thing to get Layane to like Roen? Would it ruin Roen's game if you came along too?
Layane tightened her grip. Maybe it wouldn’t be that bad, but from her angle, it certainly looked it. He turned to Roen, to try to catch a sign of worry on his face, but there was none. When he realized she was looking his way, he held out his hand for her to hold.
“No!” she said, taken aback. “I’m fine…”
There must be some pronoun typos in here, or it doesn't make sense at all.
I now firmly believe that this is some wingman shit. Roen fell in love with the girl he was stalking, told Elint, and Elint is trying to find a way to push them together because he's Team Roen all the way.
She lifted her arm to push away his hand, when she felt something force her forwards, hard. It was only when she was falling that she realized Roen had pushed her.
Layane has milliseconds to recognise that Roen pushed her with one of his invisible arms before she freefalls into ice cold water. Initially she cannot move, and it reads like she's gone into shock. Then she manages to find some momentum and drags herself and her bag to the shore.
If you are misguidedly trying to romance this girl, Roen, you could have at least pulled her out of the water into your big, strong (four) arms.
Then, she noticed Roen. He had just left the water, and was looking through one of his bags at the edge of the island.
“You pushed me!” she shouted. She dug her foot into the soft ground and kicked a lump of sand at him.
“You weren’t going to jump off,” he said, pausing his search to flick the sand off his legs.
“I was.”
“Well, you were taking too long.
Lovely.
Roen throws her a towel, which feels like the time he threw her a first aid kit when the narrative made it sound like Layane had a serious head injury. Layane wants to change into the dry clothes in her bag, but doesn't, because that would mean changing in front of Roen.
Look. I get that this isn't a great situation. I get that it's weird Roen has been following you. But given you must be freezing, why the fuck don't you just ask Roen to turn around or stand on the other side of the cave while you change? He probably wants to change, too!
Instead, Layane explores the cave. There are symbols carved into the back wall, and Layane asks Roen what they say. He says that the symbols are super old so he can't read them very well, which is a cool detail. He does know the gist, though.
“A lot of it is about how it took millions of years for the Gever to come up here. This part says that they were worried that the surface of the world was on fire, and this part says that it had been the Prophet Shafinah who had convinced us to tunnel upwards.”
Shafina is now a Prophet and has the Gever H at the end of her name, I guess.
This is possibly also a flaw of the previous drafts, but I'll flag it now: is it really 'tunnelling' if you're building a corridor through the sea?
Layane remembers they are here to save Clemant - even though it's unclear how going to Geviria will help Clemant in any way - and shouldn't waste time reading old words carved into a cave, so she tells Roen to get on with whatever he needs to do to get them inside. Roen wordlessly puts his hand through the back wall of the cave, which disappears into a dark, stone corridor.
Wanting to see more, she took a step forwards... and slammed into the rocky cave wall. With a flicker, it reappeared. “What... happened?” She held her hand up to her nose, and found that it was bleeding.
“Great,” she muttered, holding the towel up to her nose to prevent blood from going everywhere. “Would you like to explain...?”
“Humans can’t walk through unescorted,” said Roen.
You could definitely have warned her, Roen.
“But you’re right next to me!”
He held out his hand. “Yes, but it will only be recognised if I’m happily leading you in. And that means holding your hand or something.
Clearly this is because I'm dying for Roen and Layane to hold hands, but I have questions about this.
Does the cave sense if a Gever is being forced to bring a human inside against their (the Gever's) will?
If yes, surely it doesn't matter if the pair are holding hands, and it wouldn't make sense for Layane to have walked into the wall?
If no, couldn't a human just drag a Gevirian towards the wall to get inside?
I guess maybe it depends if the Gever is thinking, 'I want this person to enter Geviria' or 'I do not want this person to enter Geviria'.
If it does, that means Roen canonically made Layane walk into a wall so he could hold her hand. Ah, romance.
Layane holds out her arm, and Roen drags her into the tunnel, which seems to go on forever. There's no boat on wheels this time, so I'm not sure if they're going to walk or slide down, but I'm excited.
Once inside, Roen immediately starts smoking. Layane looks at pictures of a Gever woman carved into the walls, because she's trying to distract herself from the boredom of walking down an endless corridor with someone she is giving the silent treatment to.
“It’s Shafinah,” said Roen, who had noticed her looking. “She is a prophet, and one of the current Four who I think Elint told you about. After she persuaded the Gever to build this tunnel, they carved her likeness into the stone.”
“What?” Layane laughed. “Elint said that was six hundred years ago. She can’t be alive now.”
“Yes, well that’s what we all think, too. But she is. She’s just been – around forever. We call her a Prophet.” He sounded breathless. “Some Gever reckon… that she’s been around from the beginning.”
He also mentioned all that half a page ago, but I guess you (or more likely I) forgot.
They've been walking for a while when Layane finally asks the question she probably should have asked back on the surface.
“How long does this take?” Layane said, irritated.
“I don’t know,” said Roen. “Something happens in the middle. You’ll see.”
How cryptic. I love that my Magic-Aware characters never bother explaining anything to Layane, and for some reason, Layane never asks them to elaborate.
The tunnel gets narrower, and Roen has been chain-smoking the whole way down, so Layane stays ahead of him.
It started to get warmer as they went down, but it didn’t help. At first Layane hoped that the now-hot air would dry her clothes, but it quickly became humid and made her feel sticky and horrible. She turned when she stopped hearing Roen’s footsteps behind her, to see him sat on one of the steps and drinking from the large, plastic bottle.
This is one of the more realistic choices I've made. By which I mean Roen not having the stamina to endlessly walk down a corridor, not the magic corridor heating up the closer they get to the centre of the earth, or whatever I was going for there.
Even though Roen told her 'something happens in the middle' with no elaboration, Layane decides to press on without him. She walks down the corridor, entertaining herself by trying to read the Gevirian writing.
Yes, really.
The symbols captured her interest again. While she walked, she entertained herself by spotting characters that looked like Latin ones. She had been looking to the right at something that looked like an ‘f’, when the temperature dropped.
She turned. The corridor had vanished from in front of her, and all that was in its place was shadow. “Roen?” she called up the corridor, not taking her eyes off the strange phenomenon.
Here we go.
Layane doesn't move. She calls Roen's name several times to no response. For some reason, she doesn't walk back up the stairs to look for him, but opts to wait around for him to catch up.
A chill passed down the back of her neck. She slowly turned around, and the darkness clouded her vision. A sickly-sweet smell filled her nostrils, which gave her the immediate instinct to run.
“Roen, something’s happening!” she yelled up the stairs. Her feel scrabbled at the stairs, but they couldn’t find a flat edge for support. Her attempt to stand left her winded and flat on her stomach. She was helpless as the black fog completely engulfed her.
Something was scratching her stomach, but she had little time to contemplate this. After a few breaths of the mist, she felt dizzy.
THE MIST!!!!!
I was wondering when magic mist first showed up! Had no idea it was this early! The story is now called Into The Mist and has been since around 2016, and I'd forgotten that I used magic mist this early on!
Maybe I'm getting hyped for no reason. 'Magical knockout gas' as mist is a trope, so who knows if this is what inspired the later drafts.
Anyway.
No, I have no idea what's scratching Layane's stomach. I hope it isn't Shafinah.
She threw her hands in front of her mouth, after realizing that she could be breathing in a poison. What if the Gever had put up precautions against humans breaking in - and this was one of them?
Or... maybe it's the 'something' Roen mentioned? You know, back when he said that and you made absolutely no attempt to get him to elaborate?
Furious with herself, she realized she should have stayed with Roen. This was probably happening because she abandoned him.
Then, she realized what was happening. The thought rushed into her head the moment before she slipped into unconsciousness – the stairs had smoothed into a rough slope, and she was gently sliding down it.
My characters love to realise things.
Layane is probably right. She should have stayed with Roen, because he could have explained what was happening.
Or, you know, she could have asked him what the fuck he meant by 'something happens', so he could tell her, "There's a slide so rad you need to be knocked the fuck out before you ride it."
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Star Wars - All Media Types
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Satine Kryze
Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Anakin Skywalker, Qui-Gon Jinn, Satine Kryze, Padmé Amidala
Additional Tags: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alcohol Withdrawal, Obi-Wan Kenobi-centric, Obi-Wan Kenobi Needs a Hug, Self-Reflection, Obi-Wan Kenobi Has Self-Esteem Issues, Pre-Star Wars: The Clone Wars, References to Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008), Canon Compliant, the jedi temple really should have invested in a therapist, references to death and violence but not graphic, Hurt No Comfort, well not in the way it usually looks, Recovery, Underage Drinking, also its alcohol misuse now not abuse, the 212th appear briefly, Obi-Wan Kenobi loves so much, Force Ghost Qui-Gon Jinn, The only beta we know is CSC-02
Summary:
Obi-Wan stared blankly at the flask as the old man gestured to the wreck around them. He remembered the children in the Young, how they reminded him of his creche mates, the girl in his arms; they weren't nearly old enough for everything going on. But they were old enough to die, a voice cried out inside his head. Obi-Wan took the flask and held it to his lips, the liquid burning his throat as it went down. He'd never felt so cold.
-
From the perspective of Obi-Wan Kenobi, from padawan up to 9BBY, this is a take on his life as if he suffered from alcohol misuse and how it impacted his life.
What Are the Biggest Risk Factors for Mental Problems?
In practicing a healthy lifestyle, people must consider all health aspects. Pursuing healthy living is deemed useless without ensuring this. This is why people must consider all components of wellness at all costs. Although this seems so simple, it’s a lot more challenging in reality. There is a huge tendency for people to neglect mental health.
