Jan 27, 2021
bastard man
seen from Germany
seen from China
seen from Belgium
seen from Malaysia
seen from Belgium
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Russia
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Maldives
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from Belgium
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from Belgium
seen from South Korea
seen from Malaysia
bastard man
“Kuroshitsuji” characters as zodiac signs
Aries: Finnian
Taurus: Tanaka
Gemini: Undertaker
Cancer: Mey-Rin
Leo: Elizabeth Midford
Virgo: Sebastian Michaelis
Libra: William T. Spears
Scorpio: Baldroy
Sagittarius: Lau
Capricorn: Ciel Phantomhive
Aquarius: Grell Sutcliff
Pisces: Aleistor Chamber (Viscount of Druitt)
So I know that there was something going around about this faceless lady from the Curry Contest Arc
I have a headcanon that that is Claudia Phantomhive being pictured alongside a teenage Viscount Druitt. I like to imagine that they met at a party and had an arguement, as I doubt that the Countess would take kindly to his poetics and perverse behaviour and I reckon the memory of her rings comes from her delivering a sharp slap to his face when she inevitably lost her temper with him.
Art by @luci-on-the-moon
It’s Sunday, and that means another drabble from the AU I’m collaborating on with @luci-on-the-moon! This week, you get to see a scene featuring our favorite bromance to ship, Bard and Luci!
Joker, their boss, is the king of the adult business in Houston, but the real money and power comes from extortion, and it’s up to Bard and Sebastian (Luci) to collect those dues each month.
Today, get a sample from their work day and what their friendship is like. (And who doesn’t love seeing Druitt--Aleistor Chamber--beat up?)
If you want to read the other drabbles from this AU I've posted, check out my Fan Fiction page, where you can also get links to the other art Luci has created, including Sebastian, Luci, and Ciel!
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Sebastian was silent as he held the flashlight so Bard could deactivate the house alarm and pick the lock. Aleistor Chamber, their first visit of the day, lived in what was once a posh Memorial mansion, but with a significant portion of his funds ending up in Joker’s pockets each month, the post-Harvey renovations to repair the flood damage had stalled, leaving the first floor a half finished mess of gutted walls and construction equipment.
Concentrating on his work, Bard found it worrisome that Sebastian was being patient. Normally by now he’d insist they simply break in, not wanting to wait. Despite being even more proficient at lock picking than Bard, Sebastian—or rather, Luci—simply didn’t have the patience for it. Subtly was not Luci’s motto.
“This is ridiculous,” Sebastian grumbled. “Every goddamn month. Joker should add a key to the tab already. Would save so much time.”
Sebastian’s comment made Bard grin, relaxing subtly. “You can’t kill him. He’s one of Joker’s cash cows, don’t forget.”
Sebastian rolled his eyes, but said nothing as they snuck in the house soundlessly, their black clothes blending into the darkness, easily finding their way up the stairs to the master bedroom.
Chamber had an affinity for white, everything in the room a mockery of purity, including the oversized king bed where the man slept, stupidly oblivious to the presence on either side of him.
Bard nodded to signal Sebastian could do the honors, and the man grinned devilishly, reaching over and grabbing Chamber by his long platinum-blond hair, dragging the mostly naked man out of bed just as Bard hit the switch, light filling the room and bouncing blindingly over every pale surface, causing the unprepared Chamber to cry out and squeeze his eyes shut tight, fingers uselessly trying to pry Sebastian’s from his scalp.
“Morning, Al. Did you miss me?”
“Of course, little raven.”
Bard winced. He was convinced by now despite his education and position, Chamber was a moron. Because only an idiot goaded Luci.
Sebastian snarled at the nickname and threw Chamber into the wall.
The man hit hard enough to send a framed picture crashing to the floor beside him, and he sank into a heap, whimpering.
Sebastian strode over to the man and put his foot on Chamber’s head, pushing him into the wall. “Where’s the money? I’m asking nicely.” And he was. He had yet to draw a weapon, his favorite pistol resting against his ribs in its holster and several knives strapped to his legs, some visible and some hidden. Chamber was still in one piece. Not even bleeding yet.
“I don’t have it.”
Sebastian pressed harder, his boot leaving an imprint on the man’s fair skin, his pale hair tangled and standing up from where it had been grabbed. “Not the answer I want to hear, Al. You know what happens if you don’t pay, right?”
Bard lit a cigarette, smirking at the way Chamber’s face reddened at the idea of the smell corrupting the purity of his room, an amusing thought considering what he was being blackmailed for.
“First, I get to play with you,” Sebastian sneered, the tips of his sharp canines catching the light, his red eyes seeming to glow. “And then the entire state can find out the chairman of the board of Children’s Hospital likes fucking underage boys.”
Bard took a long drag of his smoke, smirking. Joker didn’t let anyone who wasn’t legal work as an escort, but he did have several young people of both sexes who could easily pass as jailbait. The man Joker had Chamber on camera with was actually 20, which made the extortion even better, because it was a bluff.
Sebastian kicked Chamber in the chest, shoving him to the floor with a single boot. He leaned in, putting his weight on the man’s sternum. “Dr. Chamber, I bet you could tell me how long the recovery is for a broken breast bone.”
Chamber wheezed. “I told you: I don’t have the money.”
“Do you know,” Sebastian said coolly, bending his knee and leaning on it casually as if he weren’t using Chamber as a step, “that Joker has several journalists in his pocket, so while he doesn’t get as much from leaking stories as he does from blackmail, he profits either way? I wonder what the Chron headline will read in a few hours. ‘Children’s Chair Loves Kids Too Much’?”
Bard snickered. He purposefully tapped the ash of his cigarette on the pristine white carpet, putting the butt out on the bottom of his shoe and picking it up so they wouldn’t leave behind any evidence. He checked his watch. “We got a schedule, Luce.”
Sebastian growled but nodded. In a swift movement, his foot moved from Chamber’s chest to crash down on the man’s nose with a sickening crunch.
Aliestor howled in pain, cradling his face with his hands as blood slid down his cheek to the floor, staining the fibers.
Sebastian wiped his boot on the carpet to Chamber’s horror, and bent low, leaning in until his nose nearly brushed the top of the man’s hand. “Might want to call your plastic surgeon when we leave if you want to keep your pretty, pretty face. That’s a nasty break. Not gonna heal well. Get it? Heel?” Sebastian burst into laughter at his stupid joke, glancing over to see if his companion found it nearly as humorous.
Bard just sighed and rolled his eyes, shoving another cigarette in his mouth, unlit.
“Can I castrate him, Bard? Please?”
Bard sighed. “Not until I call the boss and find out how he wants to handle this. Not gonna be pleased being woken up at this hour. Probably put him in a real bad mood.” He cast a telling glance at Chamber, another reminder that he better pay up, or his career wouldn’t be the only thing he’d be losing.
Sebastian pulled his large Bowie knife from the holster on his hip and sank down until he was straddling Chamber’s legs. He cut the whimpering man’s underwear off with ease and frowned. “Might need a smaller knife for such a tiny job. This why you like kids? Even the tightest adult virgin ass not tight enough for something so . . .” Sebastian sank his knife into the ground just beneath Chamber’s balls, making the man jerk and tremble. “Hey, Bard, what’s another word for ‘tiny’?”
Bard had his phone out as if he were dialing Joker. He shrugged as he pressed it to his ear.
“Ask Joker.” Sebastian had his index finger on the top of the blade’s handle, gently nudging it from side to side, grinning at how it made Chamber sob harder, his nose still bleeding.
“OK, OK!”
Bard hung up, disconnecting the call to his favorite pizza place, eyebrow raised.
“My dr—drawer. Dress—dresser,” Chamber stuttered. He pulled a hand from his face to point, his nose, eyes, and cheeks already bruising.
Bard leveled a hard look at Sebastian to warn him to behave, only moving once he saw the man take his hand off the knife and sink back onto his haunches, sulking. Nothing got Luci going more than someone who abused children, making him even more dangerous than normal.
Bard crossed the room, pulling the first drawer out and dumping its contents on the floor before tossing it aside. His nose turned up at the vast assortment of dildos, vibrators, buttplugs, and other sex toys, grateful he was wearing gloves. He was about to try the next drawer when he spotted an envelope taped to the back of the cabinet. He leaned in, prying it off. When he opened it, he saw a row of crisp $100 bills, more than enough for the month’s payment. He fanned them with his thumb to show Sebastian, who sighed loudly, yanking his knife from the floor in such a way he drew a thin line of blood from Chamber’s scrotum, but otherwise caused no further harm.
Bard pocketed the money. “Was that so difficult? Coulda saved yourself a lot of pain if you’d just given us the money from the start.”
Sebastian slid his knife in its scabbard and stood, kicking Chamber for good measure. “Shoulda let me cut his balls off.” He pouted, but made for the door anyway.
“Maybe next month,” Bard said, patting Sebastian’s shoulder, casting a warning glare Chamber’s way, suggesting next time he might not be able to hold Luci back.
A few thoughts on Aleistor Chamber
Aleistor Chamber is part of the whole Characters-we-don’t-know-enough-about league in Kuroshitsuji (also starring Francis, Undertaker and many more - stay tuned!). It isn’t clear enough if his character is purely for comic relief purposes in the manga or if there’s actually something more about him, if he could know something more.
As you all know, but just to make it clear, the theory that I’ll go down with:
I strongly believe the prefect behind Vincent in this picture is Aleistor.
It is possible that Aleistor was someone Vincent trusted, or at least worked with, occasionally - without him being necessarily part of the Aristocrats of Evil. I’d say that is how Undertaker got to Aleistor, through Vincent. But well, this is my opinion.
We also know that Aleistor Chamber has been acting like ‘who is this, who is this’ each time he met our Ciel. While he really might be that stupid not recognize him at all, in the Campania Arc he says something really interesting.
“I shall be eagerly awaiting the day when I am able to gaze into both of your eyes.”
What struck me when I read this was, was he actually talking about real!Ciel there? The moment they would be successful in awakening real!Ciel?
It’s not impossible. It’s not the only time he says something fishy like that. Also, as you can see, what he says here appears to be in bold. So yes, there could be something going on. I’d say, at least, Aleistor might have known about Undertaker’s goals this whole time and actually helped him with them. Why? Although it’s another matter to discuss in another post, I’d say either Aleistor is too foolish and can be easily controlled, either he has something he’s after.
Do remember Undertaker says:
This is it for now! Thank you very much for reading and I’m always eager to hear your opinions, be it here, on this post, in private or through the anonymous asks. :)
Kuroshitsuji Minor Character Poll
Eden: With the overwhelming popularity of the Devil Six, we wanted to see how the popularity spread changes without them. It seems a bit unfair with such a difference between 1st and 7th place so we put together this poll to see how the Western fandom sees the minor characters.
All responses will remain anonymous but will be compiled into some fancy graphs to compare everyone’s rankings. With that, we thank you for taking the time to do this poll.
// VOTE HERE //
I was going to post this draft but its honestly too insulting to flat-earthers