#aluracein

[heavywingedcherubim]

Illusion

What is around me is the cause of my unhappiness

It’s his fault, it’s hers

I hate my body, I hate my job

It is the world’s fault I’m miserable

Holding me back from what is desirable 

My boss is an idiot, my friend is a jerk

I plod about each day without a clue

It’s everyone else’s fault that I’m hurt

What I don’t realize is I am a fool

As I continue to deflect blame and hate

To insist that the world would be great

If everything I wanted, I could create

When everything is perfect, then life can be celebrated

Yet I dance to someone else’ tune

Yet I continue to be berated

My parents suck, they don’t understand

Not realizing that it’s because of what I do

If only I had the right car, the right house

The best location, the best situation

I continue to be unaware that my strings are being pulled

By beings well outside of my control

Blinded by the media, the upbringing, and strife

I believed I was in control of my life

The facade came crashing down all around

Now that I know that control was always beyond

Yet it was out of reach and out of sight

I now know I must venture within

For my understanding of the truth to finally begin

[heavywingedcherubim]

Mountains and golden skies by tobysquid

I decided to share my painting. Enjoy it. I’m learning how to paint and I have not watched a tutorial for this, but I did watch three Bob Ross episodes if that counts. lol

[heavywingedcherubim]

As a student of #aluracein, I watched the first #matrix movie and I saw it with a different #perspective than I did when I was still heavily asleep and dumb. While the movie itself presents a rather action heavy story, I see how most people would rather believe this world to be real. The spoon isn't really a spoon, it's not truly there, but the #coding within the #program tells you to see a spoon. You can't bend it with your #mind because you believe it is solid. See? When you follow the rules, they apply. But when you decide to be like neo and stop following the #rules of how a reality functions, they stop applying. However, what you don't realize is that the #powers that be would not let you be completely #free and work diligently to set others free. Do you want freedom? Join the Church of I.M., learn the teachings given by @alura_cein @alura.cein . Follow the #illumination of #Metatron, the one who knows the matrix inside and out. (at Cattaraugus Reservation)

[heavywingedcherubim]

Got my Akasha reading done by @alura.cein . Highly recommended as it does provide valuable #insight and clear up any confusion that was had. I was up to all sorts of shenanigans but I learned from experience, though while I made a lot of mistakes and I did a lot of poor #choices, I was told that I had to get my act straightened out. It was like the fear of #God was struck into me and I didn't want the closing of my stay on Earth to end on a sour note. So I did get a #clearer perspective on memories I was able to have. I wasn't all bad, and I wasn't all good, and I was someone that tried to keep my learning #balanced, but the ways of the #world did tempt me. Lot of it was from being mislead. A lot of it was also being a rascal. Though in between that, I had many times I went and did #good. However, much of it was not according to #higherself and that's what kept me on the #karmic #pathway. You don't let it devastate you, but you can definitely laugh about the times you just didn't do what you were supposed to. You make up for that by doing right by higher self. And higher self would not be beating on you for mistakes made. It's like having grandkids, nieces and nephews, or children---you see yourself in a way that it is a teaching moment and you keep it in good perspective. Things got "hecked up" down here as #aluracein would say. Lol I give my gratitude to my teacher, the heavenly father, and the high heavens for what I was given. (at Cattaraugus Reservation)

[heavywingedcherubim]

As a follower of #aluracein, things I talk about is because I have faith in her word as those words come from the creator. Ultimately. As the creator is the absolute most all-knowing being there is and we all came from a source, which can from the ultimate source. I continue to work on transcending the programming that holds me back from being who I truly wish to be and accessing all I learned. I will transcend the #seeds planted in me that causes me to live according to someone else's will. It hurts to peel away layers of pain and trauma, but I love how good it feels after letting go of those seeds. #ArchangelJophiel would encourage everyone to go through the tough work because the reward happens after the unburdening. #ArchangelMichael was such a wise teacher as #Yeshua that I'm having fun learning from him and from @alura.cein explanation of his wisdom. There are several layers of understanding. #ArchangelSandolphon does visit me from time to time to give me a message and encourages me to keep going. His wisdom is what help me begin rising from rock bottom. I don't have a lot of trauma that's heavy, most of it is these little things that my mom does. I love her so much, and as I learn more about these things, I recognize much of it was for the purpose of being able to help her. These lessons we learn aren't just for self. It's for us to be able to help others. We need the #dark times to see the #light. People, believe me when o tell you that #aluracein is a real teacher and real messenger from the heavens. She would never steal people wrong. She always lives by the #angelic #virtues. Her #heart is completely dedicated to the #creator. Meaning, she will always #love each and every person that goes to her for help. She always has people's best in heart because she, like the creator, wishes for all people to get on track and grow. (at Depew, New York)

[heavywingedcherubim]

The evolution of Me. From Lauren to Tobias. :3 #transitions #energy #progress #growth #healing #changes #love #spiritualCalling #heavens #creator #lifecoaching #ally_angelica #alura_teachings #aluracein #aluraceinsupporter #feminine #masculine (at Buffalo, New York)

[heavywingedcherubim]

Healthcare work

I’ve been doing some unofficial work with my uncle to improve healthcare for native people. The longterm goal is to establish a care system that meets the needs of all indigenous tribes and nations across the country. What I enjoy about this is that I have a chance to help create something wholly positive. The downside is that I am on unemployment and that I have to make sure that I have the money to sustain my lifestyle. I don’t really indulge in anything, though my healing journey had revealed the tendencies for over-indulgence passed through genetics.

Aside from the work that I am doing for that, I am getting some experience learning to run a business and I’m very much a soft spoken person around strangers. I do not have a lot of comfort with getting into new situations and I recognize, through introspection, i am fearful of new experiences largely because of my memories of unpleasant consequences. Most of this was cleared away with though, I feel it still within my heart that I have been ridiculed, or put down before. Or even took a risk that resulted in utter failure. The difficulty is that much of what I feel isn’t just limited to my current lifetime. I carried memories with me from troubled past lives. It gets easier. I recognized the majority of this tendency to freeze is due to the conditioning I call “academic paralysis”.

Those of us who were conditioned to not question the system find ourselves unable to make positive adaptations to the “real” world. There are many of us that are unemployed and numbers of us who are employed, but drowning in stress. My issue is that I feel unable to think beyond what I normally can: academically and scholarly speaking. I can spit out information like it is my business but to learn new tasks, job duties, and anything that life demands take time. It takes experience, and at the same time, due to the nature of capitalism or any economy that emphasis the need to have a currency to pay for living expenses, I struggle. I struggle because I’m not a typical person. I am a little quirky and this academic paralysis I have makes it challenging to know what I need to do to ensure that I will survive in the world: financially.

It would not be so bad if I were able to offer services by even exchange. I could live in a small apartment and provide payment doing other things than having to be solely dependent on cash.

If you want to know what academic paralysis feels like, it’s overthinking coupled with the anxiety to make a choice, and the inability to be open of mind to new learning experience where risks are involved.

That’s it. Very simple. Though what contributes to the academic paralysis could also be the programming you are subjected to outside of academia on the regular basis. TV: the source of all the media, news, and subliminal programming that people willingly gorge on. Radio: Hidden messages and not so hidden messages within songs and conversations that cause people to be so controlled that they wonder why they are unhappy, but cannot fathom breaking free. What would they be breaking free from? Many people assume it is something outside themselves, like an annoying neighbor or that mean boss at work. The programming already went within. It’s in your mind. Your emotions are controlled as well. The layers of your being is polluted.

Would you consider living spiritually? It’s not a fad. It’s not a gimmick. It’s a real way of life that should be.

[cheriehunter]

https://alurasangels.com/angelic-virtues/

@aluracein @ethrealconsciousness