Weird Dreams
Last night I dreamt of HS. I was looking for you. You were there somewhere but never quite where I was. So I kept looking. Then I was in my car and O gets in. In an instant I layed down on him. Just had my head on his lap. We talked. I asked him what he thought of me and you. He told me he tries not to think about it. I asked him why did he say he had no problem with it. I told him I was mad that he didn't say anything. He said I didn't see the texts. I said I did...you sent me the screen shot. He said there was more. I told him to prove it. Then I couldn't find my phone to show him what you sent and I was getting frustrated. Such a weird dream. But once again I went back to him with no hesitation. Just like normal. Straight to his arms. Literally. Am I mad that he just let you have me? Hurt? Probably...but what else could he really do? Say no...he had no right to and he knows it. Out of nowhere I dream about him. It always goes back to him. Everytime. You always say I still love him. I always tell you I don't. The last time you said...that's right you love me now. Twice recently you said I loved you. Yet...I've never denied or confirmed. But I do...I know I do. I just can't say it to you. As for O...I always will somewhere in me. Forever.