Jul 20
i hate work bc every day I just want to go to work and do my job and yet everyday I feel like I'm playing an impossible interpersonal game of politics
#point 1 in the 'I might be autistic' category:#coworkers stress me out SO much#do they hate me? am I doing ok? do they think I'm the dumbest person on the planet earth? am I being weird? what are the vibes????#and when I try to explain my thought process it doesn't come across#and anyways#last week was hard#and i know it's bc the boss' sister works for us now#and I know that she thinks everyone is an idiot#which means she thinks IM an idiot#and every second I feel like I'm being weird weird weird#and doing things wrong wrong wrong#and I know she's messaging my boss abt me#and I'm just SO frustrated that no one understood what was going on with the proofs last week#and I saw a 'did you explain the process' message sent by my boss abt me#and it's like I KNOW THE PROCESS#I. KNOW. THE. PROCESS.#IM NOT FUCKING STUPID#but you were NOT UNDERSTANDING WHAT WAS HAPPENING#i BARELY changed a proof + added fb along the bottom to make something sturdy#in a way that WE HAVE DONE BEFORE#and NO ONE WOULD REASONABLY NOTICE#and therefore I didnt send a new proof bc I didn't want the customer to think we were being shady#SO PLEASE#I KNOW#I UNDERSTAND#STOP TALKING TO ME LIKE A FUCKING CHILD#and it really gets my goat bc it's not like she is perfect#she very very much has made so so so many mistakes as well#long and short is that I am really bad at interpersonal politics#and I just want to sit and do my fucking job for 8.5 hours and then go tf home after