#anhelm

[haartebeest]

I didnt feel like drawing any more but i didnt want to stop also?  So I made a compilation of my best An drawings :P ya I crazy

[themnemosyneorder]

The Cave of First Light: Cyrene's Plea

The cave smelled faintly of salt and iron, as if the stone remembered their bodies. Cyrene stood near the mouth, tasting the sea’s endless breath on her face. Her hair was unbound, long brown threads falling like a river over her shoulders, catching the dim glow of the lantern Anhelm had set between them. He sat cross-legged on the worn slab where they had once lain together, his hands clasped as if in prayer, though his eyes were restless.

“You speak of heaven as if it were a garden already blooming,” he said softly. “But the Scriptures speak of a day yet to come—a trumpet, a descent, the dead rising." He sighed. "Cyrene, please..”

Cyrene’s expression was warm and bright. Her eyes gleamed with pure affection: “And yet, beloved, did He not say, ‘Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand’?” Her voice carried the cadence of wine poured into clay, and he stirred.

“Not afar", she continued, "not locked behind the veil of death—at hand, my sweet. Here.”

She reached out and touched his breastbone lightly. “Within us.”

Anhelm’s jaw tightened. “At hand does not mean fulfilled. Hebrews says, ‘Christ will appear a second time, to save those who wait.’ And Acts—‘This Jesus will come in the same way you saw Him go.’ That is not metaphor, Cyrene. That is promise. Even command! A caution against pride. My darling, please..” His face twisted sorrowfully.

Her smile was tender, almost pitying. “And Luke tells us what he heard from the Son of God himself: ‘The kingdom of God will not come with observable signs; they will not say, “See here!” or “See there!” For indeed, the kingdom of God is in your midst.’ In our midst, Anhelm! Amongst us. Not in some distant sky, but in the marrow of our becoming. Straight from our Lord we know this!”

He looked up at her then, and for a moment his eyes were raw with longing. “If only that were true..” he whispered to himself; then something in him pulled away.

Cyrene knelt, her hands resting on his knees.

“It is stewardship, my love,” she said. “Isaiah dreamed of the lion and the lamb lying together. Harmony, not conquest, sweetheart. We are called to tend creation, not abandon it for a world beyond. A world that may not even exist - a delusion, a misinterpretation, a lapse in our own understanding of ourselves!"

Her eyes flashed and she stood up. "Why would we turn away from God's own, unbound ambition for us!?"

She turned and clasped her hands around his neck with fierce affection: "Would rejecting this possibility not be a terrible lapse of faith, my precious, precious, husband?! And even if I am wrong, even if a Second Coming happens in a different way, my darling, how would it be wrong to welcome our Lord from beyond the stars, with love in our hearts? With children who love and parents who love and with LIFE everlasting? Life in God's word and in God's own flesh! Will he tell us off for aspiriing to that? Love God and Love your neighbour! What law mentions a mandatory death!?"

"And if I am right, just consider it, Anhelm! Rejecting this terrible, beautiful, extraordinary path, my love, our own failure would condemn us to eternal purgatory! Our whole species! Condemned to approximations and failures and self-deception in the face of avoidable biological death, avoidable decay! Has Ashwinter taught us nothing? Indeed how can we tend to a child's wellbeing today and tomorrow, and in a year's time, and to our own health, but then at some arbitrary time, to suddenly stop and welcome death?? And if we celebrate and protect and enjoy health, why not do so wholeheartedly, unceasingly? Why limit ourselves to decades. Would anyone dare argue that medieval life expectancy pleased God? That penicillin and modern medicine and life-saving surgeries are hostile instead of angelic? Why not three centuries, then? Why not millennia? Is the world really so boring and its richness so scarce that we become bloated with the gift of life!?"

Anhelm’s breath shuddered. “And yet Revelation speaks of a new heaven and a new earth. A consummation DESPITE physical decay. A raising and judgement of the dead.” He ran his hand through his hair with visible anxiety.

Her laugh was soft, filled with a deep sadness. “Revelation? A vision in a cave, Anhelm. A man exiled on Patmos, fevered with solitude. You know this—you dismantled the other lies yourself. Mary and Joseph, chastity twisted into chains. You tore that veil. Why stop now? Why not lean on Christ's words alone?!”

His eyes darkened. “Because this is different. This is eternity. Our power is limited for a reason... these, these mortal fingers perish so, so that our faith in a world beyond us can be glorified, even in Death!"

"NO! My God, Anhelm! GLORY AND DEATH?! Only if unavoidable!! The Son of Man himself wished it not, his sweat was blood and the cup unbearable! He did it so we don't have to!!” she exclaimed. “Please." She stopped, took a deep breath. "The Lord's words were not riddles, but seeds. ‘The kingdom is at hand.’ ‘The kingdom is among you.’ Why cling to the old scaffolds of fear? To drink his blood is to learn! To eat his flesh is to live!! Was an innocent death not enough? Was it not enough that He wished He Lived? He died so that we could live! It's so clear! It’s so clear! THE WHOLE UNIVERSE was made for us, Anhelm. The Father  will and CANNOT change what HE preordained - He will wait forever for us to create his Kingdom, create it HERE AMONGST US as his Son told us to! There is NO necessity for us to die in order to fulfil the law - LOVE AND LIFE ARE NOT AT ODDS WITH EACH OTHER! Yes, we must be ready to die FOR love, but equally we must seek life and turn away from death. It is a binary, my love! There is no middle ground! You either want to live, or you want to die! Please, Anhelm!"

There was a brief and tense quiet. The light of the lantern flickered silently between them.

"Do you understand what you're asking me to accept, my love? To watch my body dissolve while my mind still burns for you?" Her face was for a moment the face of agony.

Anhelm rose abruptly, pacing the cave like a man pursued by invisible birds. “You speak as though flesh could bear divinity. But Paul says—‘This perishable body must put on the imperishable, and this mortal body immortality.’ Realising midsentence that this was not the direction he actually wanted to veer towards, Anhelm quickly added: “But NOT by artifice, Cyrene!! By death… yes.. and by.. by resurrection - NEITHER of our own hand but through, through Christ alone!!” His face was a mask of pain.

“What?! How?! Have you not said yourself just now? Even Paul glimpsed it. Wherever does it say that to not die one must die first?! Please, you are classically trained, Anhelm! Please, use your Reason - relinquish the dogma, relinquish the fear!!” Tears started pouring down her face.

He turned, eyes fierce, not listening: “And what of the angels? Thrones, dominions, powers—Colossians names them. Orders beyond our ken. Do you think we can vault their hierarchy by chemistry and will? That we can storm heaven with our own hands?!”

Cyrene’s voice was steady. “And yet Christ Himself shattered that hierarchy by incarnation. He walked among us. Ate, wept, bled. If divinity could stoop to flesh, why should flesh not rise toward divinity? Be perfect as your Father is perfect! It is what he taught us!! Children of God! Her eyes shone through the tears. “You know that God works not, cannot work against Itself - angels and demons and whatever other principalities exist, they are bound by the same laws of physics and metaphysics as we are - if it is ordained that we encounter them, if indeed they play their subtle part in the full Order, as they probably do, and have done for centuries, then surely the Angels will sing and praise our vanquishing of the illness of decay, just as the demons will snarl away at it and lie about what’s true and right!” “I see it happening right now”, she thought, and nearly said it.

Anhelm’s tone hardened. “Yet death is the crucible. Without it, there is no redemption. The Church, the Church teaches—original sin, corruption inherent in flesh. We cannot mend that fracture with our own hands. We need deliverance, Cyrene. Metaphysical deliverance through Christ alone!!”

Her eyes glimmered like wet stones. “And what if that deliverance is not a thunderclap from the clouds, but a slow dawn within us? What if Christ’s second coming is not spectacle, but incarnation—again and again—in those who dare to love without fear?"

He continued pacing in the narrow light of the lantern. She continued, softly: "I have held dying children in my arms, Anhelm. Please don't preach to me about the beauty of endings.” 

He closed his eyes, looking away from her terrible face; suddenly he could think of nothing but cite Revelation; he began in a sort of mournful fugue: ‘Behold, I saw a new heaven and a new earth… and the former things passed away.’ He spoke it aloud, as if to anchor himself. “If the former things pass away, Cyrene, then what you propose—immortality, perpetual stewardship—defies prophecy; it defies God.” He finally looked at her, pleadingly.

She leaned close, her breath warm against his face. “Or fulfils it. If the old order passes, let it pass through us. If a new earth dawns, let us be its dawn. Tell me, Franciscan —how would living another year, and another, how would loving and keeping love alive be sin? If it is not sin today, how could it be tomorrow? Would you ever stop loving me, my husband?” She pulled her soft warm body to his and she sobbed.

He trembled. 

Outside, the sea roared like a neglected animal. For a long while, neither spoke. Then Anhelm reached for her hand, and then for her shoulder, and then for the back of her neck. 

[themnemosyneorder]

Scene: Anhelm and the Wolves

The northern inland moors beyond Lindisfarne were raw and wind-scoured, a world of heather and stone where the North Sea’s roar came unabated. Here, far from the glass cathedral rising on the tidal flats, Anhelm had begun his own work —he saw it an act of fidelity to the earth as it was.

He dug with his own hands, spade biting into peat and clay, carving out the foundations for a low, iron-framed structure—not a proud paradise, but a shelter against the storm. Around him, wolves moved like shadows, their pelts silvered by frost, their eyes bright with feral light. He had raised them from pups, fed them on synthetic meat to blunt their hunger for blood, yet he had not broken their wildness. They were companions, not pets—creatures of edge and honesty, as he believed life should be.

The largest of them—a male with a ruff like winter fog—pressed its muzzle against his shoulder as he worked. Anhelm paused, fingers curling into the wolf’s fur, feeling the heat of its breath, the pulse of its heart. “You, Cassian” he murmured, “are truth. Not a garden of glass, not endless days. Just this—wind, earth, and the mercy of time.”

Above, drones from the Huánghǎi Corps traced arcs across the sky, ferrying material to the south. He looked toward the horizon, where the abbey’s spire gleamed like a lance of light, and his jaw tightened.

“She builds forever,” he whispered, “and calls it grace. But grace is not conquest. Grace is surrender.”

The wolves circled him, their bodies weaving through the heather like time. 'You are wild as the breath of God', he thought.

In the distance, a lion roared.

Cassian froze, but he did not whine.

-

The heather bent wildly and they slept.

[themnemosyneorder]

Scene (Cyrene, Anhelm): The Argument in the Lab (Lindisfarne, Earth, 2139 A.D.)

The abbey had risen from ruin like a glorious old modern cathedral. Its cloisters were glass now, its arches veined with steel, and in the heart of the old choir stood a laboratory humming with light. Gene-sequencers whispered where monks once chanted. On the walls, fragments of stone scripture gazed down upon screens alive with code and color.

Cyrene stood at the center, her hands trembling—not with age, but with the weight of revelation. Before her, Anselm sat rigid on a bench of polished oak, his Franciscan cord still knotted at his waist though the habit was long gone. His eyes were shadowed, his jaw set like a locked reliquary.

“I have done it,” she said, her voice low but fierce. “The senescence barrier is broken. No more decay, no more slow surrender to dust. Anselm—this is what Christ meant when He said the Kingdom is at hand. Not a distant heaven, but this world transfigured.”

He stared at her, silent.

She moved closer, her words gathering fire. “We are stewards of an infinite cosmos. Do you think God gave us stars to die before we reach them? Do you think He delights in graves? No—He called us to subdue, to heal, to bring the lamb and the lion together. I have done it, Anselm. Predators and prey, reconciled through grace and gene. Synthetic flesh for the wolf, peace for the lamb. The curse undone.”

Tears burned her cheeks, bright as molten glass. “And you—” her voice broke, then rose again, trembling with hope and fear—“you and I, in this love, in this joy—how can this be a thing of moments? How can God give such bliss only to snatch it away? We are His image, His presence in the universe. To throw that away is not humility—it is treason.”

Anselm’s hands clenched on his knees. When he spoke, his voice was iron. “You speak of conquest, not stewardship. You speak of heaven, but you build Babel. Life is precious because it ends, Cyrene. A rose that never fades is no rose at all.”

She laughed, bitter and bright. “So you want me dead, then? Is that your gospel? That love must rot to be real?”

His mouth opened, then closed. He could not answer.

She pressed on, relentless. “Christ condemned death. Whether He rose in flesh or only in symbol, the meaning is the same: death is the enemy. After hatred, death is the enemy. And you—you would make peace with it?”

“Better peace than pride,” he said, his voice low, almost pleading. “Better a short life in grace than an endless one in rebellion.”

“Rebellion?” Her eyes blazed. “To heal is rebellion? To love without end is rebellion? By the Lord, Anselm, be reasonable!!.”

He turned from her then, his shoulders bowed, his silence heavier than any curse. The hum of the machines filled the void between them. Outside, the tide was rising, whispering against the glass like the ghost of the old sea.

Although she knew the loss then, Cyrene pledged to have this conversation again and again until he was either dead or enlightened. For how could the two coexist.

[themnemosyneorder]

Timeline (Writer's Note): The Cyrene Epoch and Martian Transition

2098 – Birth of Cyrene in ?, Earth.

Raised in a post-climate-crisis Europe, educated in biochemistry and theology.

Early affiliation with Mnemosyne Order during its formative years.

2120s – The Ashwinter Years Begin

A chain of volcanic eruptions in the Pacific Ring of Fire triggers a decade of atmospheric dimming and agricultural collapse.

Earth enters a prolonged resource crisis; religious and political tensions escalate.

Mnemosyne consolidates influence as a stabilizing force, promoting emotional literacy and controlled reproduction.

2130s – The Great Schism of Doctrine

Mnemosyne’s theology of “governed birth” and sanctified union clashes with the Roman Curia and other Earth-based authorities.

Cyrene becomes a leading voice in the debate, publishing her commentaries on the Nine Clauses.

Her marriage to Anselm (a former Franciscan) becomes both scandal and symbol.

2140–2148 – The Mars Covenant Era

First permanent Martian colonies established under strict governance frameworks.

Mnemosyne Order gains authority over birthing rights on Mars, citing Cyrene’s principles.

Cyrene pioneers regenerative medicine and telomeric stabilization, quietly achieving near-immortality.

2148 – Apparent Death of Cyrene (Age 50)

Official records mark her passing during a Mnemosyne mission on Mars.

In truth, she enters deep concealment under the Order’s highest secrecy, continuing her work on life extension and societal ethics.

2150–2170 – Post-Schism Reconstruction

Earth stabilizes under new federated governance; Mars becomes a cultural crucible for Mnemosyne ideals.

Emotional literacy programs reshape Martian childhood, leading to phenomena like the Versiform Habit.

2170–2195 – The Versiform Era

Spontaneous adoption of Shakespearean-like verse in Martian society during moments of heightened emotion.

Seen as a cultural flowering linked to Mnemosyne pedagogy.

2200+ – Cyrene in Shadow

Still alive, operating under multiple identities, guiding Mnemosyne policy from behind the scenes.

Her great tragedy: Anselm refused immortality, aged, and died decades earlier, leaving her to mourn in silence.

[themnemosyneorder]

Scene: Cyrene on Lindisfarne – The Retreat

The tide was out, and the island lay opened to the wind. Cyrene stood on the headland, her cloak snapping like a banner, the sea cold against her cheeks. Below, the Mnemosyne sisters moved in quiet procession along the strand, the sweep of their robes drowned by the cry of the gulls.

She was thirty then, her hair bound in a simple knot, her hands calloused from work. A Taurus born on the first of May, she loved the weight of wool, the grain of bread, the honest heft of clay cups. These were sacraments to her—textures and tastes that spoke of a Creator who delighted in matter. How could such a God despise the body? How could Rome, with its penitentiaries and its iron dogmas, call pleasure a sin?

She thought of Mary and Joseph, their names worn smooth by centuries of pious denial. Did they not touch? Did they not laugh in the dark, whispering like any lovers? To Cyrene, it was unthinkable that holiness required sterility. Love was not a concession to flesh; it was the flesh transfigured.

Patience, though—that was her hardest virtue. Patience with the stupid, the proud, the men who mistook rigidity for righteousness. She had debated priests until her tongue ached, endured their smirks when she spoke of chastity as governance, not negation. They quoted canons; she quoted the self-evident reality of the most obvious kind!

Now, as the sisters knelt in the sand, she felt the old fire stir. She did not know it, but this was her last retreat before the storms began. She drew her cloak tighter and turned toward the cave where Cuthbert once prayed. The stone would be cold, but she welcomed it. Cold sharpened thought, and she had much to think on: the Order’s future, the children yet unborn, the laws that must be written.

Somewhere beyond the dunes, a man walked alone.