Belt of Venus
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Belt of Venus
I’m vaugly recalling my Sophmore year of highschool When some brat hit me in the face with a twilight book for calling Edward Cullen and the rest of the vampires in those book “Blood Sucking Pixies” I’m sorry if I’m not a fan of those books. Forgive me for being particular about my literature. >:C
Hit your keyboard with a book and blog that.
About three things I was absolutely positive. First, Edward was a vampire. Second, there was a part of him- and I didn’t know how dominant that part may be-that thirsted for my blood. Third, I better haul ass away from this school, this town, and call the police. I mean, who falls in love with a vampire anyways? I’d rather date a wizard.
The next motherfucker to tell me that Twilight was a better series then Harry Potter, I'm going to Sectum Sempra your chest cavity. Those are fucking fighting words. Stop it. Do not compare a glittery, angsty, controlling bitch of a vampire, and his emotionally constipated, not knowing what she wants, can't accept a fucking gift girlfriend to the Golden Trio. EVER. If anyone wants to argue about this, I swear to God. I'm not even going to talk, I'm going to put on my house robes, apparate to your house, and fling boiling hot butter beer in your fucking face.
wxngman replied to your post “wxngman replied to your post:i have to read an analytical essay about...”
....how on earth is twilight a feminist piece?
the person thinks that since they did a role reversal of the male being the one who isn’t all about sex, and the girl being the sex driven one, that it was making a feminist statement. ( which i dont think that qualifies as something being feminist and also she said “The novels also respond to mainstream awareness of feminism and the political correctness of empowering female characters”..which lbr here - Bella isn’t an ‘empowered’ female character. )
Vampires
Sparkling vampires are as realistic as cloning dinosaurs from a fossilized bug. Nor should vampires be romantic. Sexy? Hell yes. Erotic? Oh God, please! But romantic? Please…you’re lunch not a prospective wife. I can look at chickens and think “Oh pretty.” Or “Damn that’s a handsome bird.” But that doesn’t stop me from ringing the little bugger’s neck and frying it up. So in short vampires can totally be drop dead gorgeous and the source of many sleepless nights but in the end they still want one thing-and it is not sex. They sure as hell don’t watch their victims sleep, and let’s be honest that’s creepy whether it’s a super natural being or not. I mean really-girl wakes up to find some strange dude leaning over her watching her sleep. Half the time she has never seen the creep before and what is her first thought? “He has pretty eyes” or “So handsome” or something along those lines. What it should be is “What the hell is this creep doing?!” followed by the sickening crack of his nose breaking under her fist. Unless it’s a vampire. Then the sickening crack comes from him catching her fist and breaking her arm. Unless she is a vampire hunter. Then there’s a possibility she could have realized the creep is a vampire and because of years of intensive training she is able to plunge a wooden stake through his heart. And yes wooden stakes through the heart kills vampires because honestly who wouldn’t that kill? I mean seriously, stick a wooden stake through anyone’s heart, Jesus himself for all I care, and they’re going to die. Jesus may come back, and then there will be some serious consequences because he’s the son of God and he’s probably really sick of this getting murdered shit, BUT the average person will just die.
Twilight is how Sasuke apologist see the Naruto series
A few days ago I made the joke that Twilight is how Sasuke apologists(big difference from Sasuke fans, who understand his flaws like how he doesn't give a shit about Sakura or Kakashi and apologists that love THEIR version of Sasuke, who contradicts with canon Sasuke) view the Naruto series. But I just realize that joke is disturbingly correct. If we look at it like this. Sasuke is Edward, Sakura is Bella, and Naruto is Jake.
Edward is the good looking, popular boy that is hunted by his past just like Sasuke is. They are both aloof and stoic. And based on Midnight sun(I don't really read the series, I looked it up on Tv Tropes to see how fucked up it was), both are arrogant. Part I Sakura was the girl that fell for the popular boy, was selfish and didn't really do anything, which is pretty much Bella. While Naruto like Jake was the kind boy that likes Sakura/Bella, but she only liked him as a friend, and has a rivalry with Sasuke/Edward. And that were the comparisons to Naruto canon end and where the SS delusions start.
SS is in the end of a day, an abusive relationship. But the SS fans refuse to see it as that. They think it as a perfect relationship(I am very scared for these people.) Sasuke has done nothing but cause pain for Sakura since Part II. Yet SS fans seem to think the idea that Sakura's feelings for Sasuke are turning platonic is impossible. They think his actions are tough love, and make a lot of excuses for him being a tool. Just like how the Bella/Edward relationship is portrayed in their canon. Edward and Bella relationship is abusive, Edward puts Bella down, he manipulates her, he makes her decisions and has harmed her. You know just this list. But the in-universe view is that their relationship is the "purest of all loves"(I nearly vomited just typing that), and the fanbase sees it as that as well.(WHY???). Similarly how Bella will always love Edward despite him breaking up with her cause her to literally be suicidal and causes her tons of emotional anguish.
In fact the Jacob/Bella relationship is just like Naruto/Sakura relationship before Jacob turned into a werewolf. Naruto/Jacob was the nice guy that liked Sakura/Bella. They had a kind and supportive relationship. When Sasuke/Edward leaves Naruto/Jacob become closer to Sakura/Bella. And that is where canon ends. Then Jacob turned into werewolf and Jacob is now SS version of Naruto. A jackass, who is not any better than Edward. He tries to control Bella. Like how SS fans think Naruto was being Sexist towards Sakura in 676(good god he wasn't. This is insult to both the NaruSaku ship and Naruto, he is Ninja jesus read 680.)
Or that by having Sakura stay in love with Sasuke as SS fans claim. Sakura get no character development at all. She stays the same since Part I. Just like how Bella never changed in Twilight. She did nothing and get her happy end, doing NOTHING.
Or how the love triangle ends. It is a Bella/Edward ending, aka a SasuSaku ending. And how does Jacob gets dealt with? He instantly falls in love with Bella's daughter. It happened in a slight second before he tried to kill her. Kinda like how SS want Hinata to win Naruto's heart. Which makes no sense as Naruto never thought of her as anything but a friend. It would make as little sense as Jacob/Renesmee.
So yes SS if you want an SS ending you want Naruto to have the quality of TWILIGHT. Let that sink into your heads
Ok now that Ed threw Bella into the wall and I had my laugh time to find a new channel. God this movie would have been so much better if Ed just let his brother eat her.