THE QURAN READ-ALONG: DAY 81
We were talking about how disbelievers are hellbound. Today, let’s talk about a happier subject, namely how great believers are.
13:19 is the first ayah of the day, Mohammed again compares disbelievers to blind men and Muslims to those who can see, which is one of his favorite metaphors. The seeing/believing people, Mohammed says, are those who keep their pact with Allah and “fear their Lord, and dread a woeful reckoning”. That’s all rude (ableism!!!11) but neutral, I guess. I’ll put 13:22 down as good on the good Muslims go to jannah basis, as it says that those who “overcome evil with good” get to go to paradise. In jannah, angels will greet them.
Well, that’s pleasant. You know what that means. 13:25:
And those who break the covenant of Allah after ratifying it, and sever that which Allah hath commanded should be joined, and make mischief in the earth: theirs is the curse and theirs the ill abode.
Of course. Kuffar hell counter: 1, and bad! Man, that tiny section about jannah was so refreshing and now we’re back to the same old shit. Whatever, we’re over halfway done with the surah already, so let’s continue...
People shouldn’t rejoice in the life of the world but rather aim for jannah, according to 13:26, and Allah giveth and Allah taketh away. He sends disbelievers astray and guides believers towards him, which seems circular as per usual. The first two get put down as bad, the last as neutral.
13:29 is another good Muslims go to heaven ayah (those “who believe and do right” go to jannah) which is, again, good; 13:30 just has Mohammed declaring himself a prophet.
13:31 has Mohammed responding to people who keep bugging him about the whole “well why can’t you perform miracles, then?” thing:
As for those who disbelieve, disaster ceaseth not to strike them because of what they do, or it dwelleth near their home until the threat of Allah come to pass.
Bad! Not necessarily a kuffar hell counter hit, though, since it’s just vague “disaster” like the poor bastards of surah 7/surah 11. Allah continues his threats in the next ayah, which says:
And verily messengers (of Allah) were mocked before thee, but long I bore with those who disbelieved. At length I seized them, and how (awful) was My punishment!
If you have to keep repeating something it probably ain’t as clever a threat as you think it is, Allah boo boo.
I guess we’ll just finish up the surah today, since we’re so close to the end. 13:33 again reminds everyone that the polytheists’ gods are fake and says that their words only sway those sent astray by Allah. Er... what?
Nay but their contrivance is made seeming fair for those who disbelieve and they are kept from the right road. He whom Allah sendeth astray, for him there is no guide.
I mean... am I just missing something? Am I the crazy one? How does this make sense? Why does Allah make people believe in polytheism and then get mad when they believe in polytheism?! Bad, again!
Regardless, the polytheists go to hell.
For them is torment in the life of the world, and verily the doom of the Hereafter is more painful, and they have no defender from Allah.
Since we’ve been told that Allah gives disbelievers happiness on earth (so they will remain disbelievers and he can throw them in hell for it...), I guess this must mean the polytheists will face The Doom at the end of their lives, in addition to hell. You know, the Awful Cry, an earthquake, the hail of brimstone, something like that. Kuffar hell counter: 2 and bad.
The next ayah continues the thought, again saying that “the reward of disbelievers is the Fire” while Muslims go to jannah.
A line that may offer a clue as to whether this is a Mecca or Medina surah is in 13:36, where Mohammed claims that those “unto whom We gave the Scripture rejoice in that which is revealed unto thee”, meaning Jews and Christians. This was quite clearly not the case in the Medina days, though some tafsir authors think it’s about... this one Jewish guy from Medina who converted to Islam. You may remember him from that horrible hadith about stoning from surah 5. This ayah makes it likely that the majority of the surah was a late Mecca one, though some Medina ayat may have been stuck in there imo.
The Quran has been revealed in Arabic so that (Arab) people can easily understand it, and those who refuse to believe it “have from Allah no protecting friend nor defender”. Allah writes what he wants, so learn to deal with it. Lo! Allah taketh not literary criticism. Bad.
Minor note here on that last ayah: it says Allah has the “umm al-kitab”, literally meaning “the mother of the book”, which is typically used in the ahadith to refer to the first surah of the Quran. But the way it’s used in the Quran is... not that. We’ve seen it before back in surah 3, where it seems like Mohammed was using it to mean basically the foundation of the Quran--the laws and clear requirements contained within it, versus vaguer ayat. This ayah here, though, seems to mean something else. Allah has this “umm al-kitab” with him in heaven. So the phrase is often taken to have another meaning based on this: it’s Allah’s heavenly prototype of the Quran, written at the start of creation, or it’s a book containing... everything that will ever happen, including the words of the Quran and all the other scriptures. It’s very confusing and Islamic scholars were confused by it, too! More on this subject much later.
Anyway, prophets can only perform miracles by Allah’s permission, and he hasn’t given permission to Mohammed for some reason, so stop asking him to prove he’s a prophet you assholes. He is only meant to “convey the message” (of the disbelievers’ doom). Well, that’s neutral enough.
This ending section has an uncertain subject matter:
See they not how we aim to the land, reducing it of its outlying parts? (When) Allah doometh there is none that can postpone His doom, and He is swift at reckoning.
Some tafsir authors think this is a Medina ayah referring to reducing polytheistic territory (by conquering it and bringing it under Islam), but if it’s not that, then what is it? What “outlying parts” are being “reduced” here, and by whom? We don’t know, but it’s bad either way thanks to that last part.
Finally, no one can out-plot Allah and the disbelievers will learn the error of their ways soon enough, and Allah knows that Mohammed is telling the truth.
And that’s it. At least it was short...?
The Quran Read-Along: Day 81
Good: 4 (13:22-24, 13:29)
Neutral: 11 (13:19-21, 13:28, 13:30, 13:36, 13:38-40, 13:42-43)
Bad: 10 (13:25, 13:26-27, 13:31-35, 13:37, 13:41)
Kuffar hell counter: 2 (13:25, 13:33-35)
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