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Was feeling a bit salty this morning
@zemathememequeen
romantic media.
Ok, what pisses me off about the visual that especially the media paints of romance and romantic relationships is not only that it promotes amatonormativity. But also that the image of the relationships there is usually highly unrealistic and often also toxic!! How many plots about lies and manipulation that were in the end considered ok and inherently normal have I seen in romantic media?? Tons! What is the basis of any healthy relationship (in my opinion)?? Trust.
Why is romance painted as some twisted game of smoke and mirrors, either until the people bamboozle each other into a partnership or within the partnership?? If society/media is placing the most significance on romantic relationships (which in itself is toxic), why oh why is it so often painted as such a dysfunctional concept full of pretense????
Apart from aros who suffer from this, I honestly also feel bad for alloros. They're taught this is the standard they either should end up in or will inevitably end up in. A relationship with a person who they can't be open with and who they have to manipulate in one way or another.
I'm SO DONE WITH THIS. Media often portrays these relationships as the one and only really important intimate relationship. That's bollocks. But then they normalize many really toxic images of these relationships, too.
This is a big problem. Not only is the the hierarchy of relationships that places the romantic relationship on the top a huge issue. The way a romantic relationship is often portrayed is messed up too. For some people, performative romance is something inherent to romantic relationships, and is often learned through examples and models. From where? Society and media.
I had to get this of my chest. I'm too tired to make my point better, but feel free to add onto this. There's obviously many sides to this issue, but I wanted to point this one out because I've seen too much of it in general and I've seen the negative effect it had/has on my alloro friends and their relationships. And I'm annoyed.
TLDR: So much of romantic media is screwing up the vision of intimate relationships for everyone.
Aros: Hey maybe being single isn't a terrible thing and society places too much importance on romantic relationships
Alloros: uM ACTUALLY SWEETIE SOME PEOPLE LIKE DATING YOU WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND BECAUSE YOU'RE A HEARTLESS UNLOVING MONSTER
Aros:
Some alloros: Hey maybe...being single is okay...
Alloros: Yeah!!!
Aros:
mostly i like being aro but y’know it does kinda suck to know that you’ll never be able to be the most important person in anyone’s life
Aro Questions: The List of Alloro Things I Don’t Get
n.1: Compulsory public handholding
Disclaimer: This post is not about all alloros or against subtle PDA. Just my personal feelings. Thank u and good night.
"When you get married you lose your friends" you literally don't have to but okay
@junietuesday exactly!! They'll get tons of notes for saying the bare minimum and aros will get made fun of for saying the exact same thing!! And!! I'm !! sick of!!! It!!!
Going through the “aromantic” tag
A quick summary of every post I find. I’ll stop when I get to a post which is exclusively talking about aros.
Post 1: General LGBT post.
Post 2: Ace post, not aro-related in any way.
Post 3: Vague general LGBT thing that sounds like it might be talking about aspecs.
Post 4: Ace post, not aro-related in any way.
Post 5: Set of flags, including aro and ace flags.
Post 6: General LGBT post.
Post 7: Post about aro/gay solidarity
Post 8: Post that is vaguely related to the LGBT community. (It mentions robots though. Maybe I could interpret it as voidpunk?)
Post 9: Gay post.
Post 10: Post about questioning.
Post 11: Set of flags, including aro flag.
Post 12: Set of aro icons. The first exclusively aro post!!
But obviously aro erasure isn’t a problem. After all, nearly half the posts in our tag mention us!
