Being lithromantic gets so annoying, bc all my friends think that I'm just playing hard to get whenever I refuse to be in a relationship. And it makes me feel so bad, like I lead people on, even tho I make it clear that I don't want a relationship.
If you’re being clear with your intentions and wishes, you have nothing to feel guilty or ashamed about. Unfortunately, people are really good at hearing only what they want to hear. It’s so frustrating, and absolutely annoying, having to constantly repeat yourself.
Even so, their inability to listen to you and respect your boundaries does not reflect on you or your orientation in any way. People always feel like they’re going to be the exception to the rule, the whole “love at first sight” syndrome. Their disappointment is understandable, since we live in a society that doesn’t comprehend those of us who don’t love in traditional ways, but also completely unfair to you. I hate that you’re having to go through this.
The good thing is that, if you keep being yourself and sticking to your guns, there will be people that come into your life that do respect you, or that even share those same feelings. So don’t feel like you need to change yourself to make other people more comfortable or be pressured into relationships you don’t want.
If you feel the need to say you’re sorry when your intentions are misunderstood, then do so, but phrase it that way--”I’m sorry that I wasn’t clear,” or “I’m sorry there was a misunderstanding.” Use “I” statements; it makes people more inclined to hear what you have to say because they don’t subconsciously feel like they’re being accused.
Remember: there’s nothing wrong with you. Being lithromantic/akoiromantic is part of what makes you who you are, what makes you special. You don’t have to apologize for that.
Thank you for sharing. I hope things improve! <3
